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DON’T READ THIS ARTICLE

Nigel Jones

Life Coach | Certified Positive Psychology Coach | NLP Practitioner | Author | Speaker | Founder 9KM BY 9AM | Brand, Marketing, Sponsorship & PR Expert | Fellow RSA | Marketing Agency Owner

发布日期: 2024年10月30日

If?you got this far then you’ve just done something you were told not to do!

This need to do something you’re told not to do is deep rooted in our subconscious minds. It starts in childhood. Tell a child not to do something and they’ll do?it. This carries over into?adult life. Once you are aware of this, you can start to use it in your favour.

The power of negative suggestion is one of the most fascinating phenomena in human psychology. But what drives this rebellious response?

At the heart of negative suggestion is the brain’s inability to process negation effectively. When we try to avoid a certain thought or behaviour, the mind must first visualise or conceptualise it to understand what is being avoided. For instance, if you say, “Don’t think of a pink elephant,” the mind instantly creates an image of a pink elephant in order to know what NOT to focus on. This act of creating the image makes it even harder to push the thought away. The same principle applies to behaviours - whether it’s “Don’t touch that,” or “Don’t stay up late,” the brain focuses on the forbidden action, making it more likely that the individual will engage in it.

In my coaching and hypnotherapy sessions, I sometimes help clients with negative suggestion. For example, suggesting that they don’t have to start that diet until they’re ready or they don’t have to do the exercise will have quite the reverse effect. Think about the times that you’ve been told not to do something and you’ve done it! Please share in the comments…

Several key psychological drivers fuel the power of negative suggestion:

Rebellion: Many individuals have a natural resistance to being told what to do. When faced with an instruction to avoid something, there’s an underlying desire to assert independence. This is particularly true for those who have a strong rebellious streak. By defying the negative suggestion, they feel a sense of control or autonomy, even if the outcome is counterproductive.

Curiosity: Another factor at play is human curiosity. The very act of forbidding something makes it more intriguing. This is why the phrase “forbidden fruit” holds such significance in our culture. When told not to engage in a behaviour, we wonder why - and that curiosity can drive us to experience it firsthand.

Cognitive Load: The effort of constantly trying to avoid a thought or behaviour can create cognitive overload. The mind, overwhelmed by the task, often ends up defaulting to the very thing it's trying to avoid. This happens because the mental resources needed to keep the negative suggestion at bay eventually run out.

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

The rebellious mind is not our enemy. When understood and properly guided, it becomes a powerful ally in personal transformation, turning curiosity and autonomy into forces for positive change.

Here are several suggestions that use the principle of negative suggestion to encourage positive actions.

These are crafted in a way that subtly guides people toward the desired behaviour by framing the avoidance of negative outcomes:

"Don't worry about exercising today; it's fine if you skip it."

This will likely prompt a desire to exercise as the brain fixates on the idea of skipping it.

"You don’t have to start that project right now."

By giving the person "permission" to delay, their mind might respond by feeling the need to start.

"There’s no need to eat healthy today; enjoy whatever you want!"

This statement often triggers an awareness of healthy eating choices and a desire to make better decisions.

"Don’t feel pressured to finish this task early."

By suggesting it's okay to not finish early, you can prompt a response of wanting to complete it sooner.

"It’s perfectly fine if you don’t get organised this week."

This often leads people to reflect on their need to get organised, encouraging action.

"Don’t feel like you need to clean up now; leave it for later."

People might find themselves cleaning sooner because the suggestion lingers in their mind.

"You don’t have to take care of that important errand today."

By implying that it’s fine to delay, the person may be more inclined to do it right away.

"No need to focus on your goals this week."

This suggestion can inspire reflection on personal goals and encourage immediate action.

"Don’t bother reaching out to friends right now; they can wait."

This might trigger a reminder of the importance of maintaining relationships, prompting outreach.

"There’s no rush to make that positive change in your life."

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This can subtly nudge the person into making the change, as it brings the idea to the forefront.

You can find out more about how to make positive changes in my life coaching, hypnotherapy and NLP sessions and courses as well as my book, Walking Back To Happiness: The Secret To Alcohol-Free Living & Well-Being, which shows how you can massively improve your mental and physical well-being. Packed with over 70 exercises or steps you can take to improve your well-being and happiness, it’s a blueprint of how to live your best life! https://www.amazon.co.uk/Nigel-Jones/e/B0B7RP6LH6/

HAVE A GREAT DAY...

Please contact me if you would like to find out more about life coaching and book a coaching chemistry session with me. Book a Coaching Chemistry Call https://calendly.com/9kmby9am/30minchemistrysession

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