Don't Be a Miser in Self-Love
Debesh Choudhury, PhD
Information Security Researcher, Academician, Entrepreneur | Password & Cybersecurity, Digital Identity, Biometrics Limit, 3D Education | Linux Trainer | Writer | Podcast Host
I love myself less than I should. It is one of my OMG moments!
Today I have read a micro post by a fellow blogger. It is about self-love. To my utter surprise, I have discovered a stunning fact about myself. I love myself less than I love others. My love for the world is much bigger than I love myself.
I know that I should be proud. But, I am not. If I can't love myself unconditionally, how can I do justice to others? It is not just possible. I must love myself more.
Image 01: Photo by?Hassan OUAJBIR?from?Pexels
Love for ourselves is the food our souls deserve.
We should not be miser in devouring enough self-love.
How many times have you offered yourself leisure time?
I always thought that utilization of time is an outstanding achievement in life. I generally don't work very hard, but I never gave myself a dedicated holiday entirely for myself.
I spent enough time with the family. I often went on vacation with them. These were like rituals we enjoyed once or twice a year.
Sometimes we paid a considerable cost in traveling and hoteling. The places were beautiful that we visited in different geographical locations. There were hill stations and seasides. There were homestays in country regions.
All these were for enjoyment along with the family and friends.
Image 03: Photo by?Pavel Danilyuk?from?Pexels
But, I never tried to go on a solo short trip, say a half-day trip to a riverside which is not far. I like to explore nearby places, sometimes by walking, and sometimes by taking the help of a bicycle. Bicycle trips are very energy efficient, and completely devoid of environmental pollution.
Do you think of giving a little time for yourself? It won't require much time and money. It won't take a long time away from your family and friends.
How many times have you offered yourself a food treat?
Image 04: Photo by Lisa Fotios from Pexels: https://www.pexels.com/photo/selective-focus-photography-of-pasta-with-tomato-and-basil-1279330/
It may sound very typical to eat something you like very much once in a while. For example, I like vegetables which don't appear on our regular menu in our home. Although I buy vegetables almost every alternate day, I don't put enough seriousness into preparing a simple vegetable item for myself!
Since last year, I started to cook food items that are close to my heart. I cook vegetables, fish, and simple snacks. All these food items are not costly and are not high calories foods.
Enjoy cooking and eating foods that you like.
Let your family and friends have a taste of your cooking experiments.
I and my friend from Iran used to prepare chicken barbeque on the terrace of our college dormitory. He was a foreign student pursuing doctoral research at our university. I enjoyed having Iranian preparation of chicken with rice. The other students used to laugh at us. But, we used to enjoy our self-prepared simple foods.
Or, you may even try eating in a countryside restaurant which gives simple and cheap foods. Let the small restaurants earn something.
And, you can always ask your friends and family members to join you. They will enjoy a day out around the village sides of your country.
How many times do you think to pursue your passions?
I used to learn an Indian percussion instrument called Tabla for many years. I had known it since I was the 2nd standard in elementary school. I pursued Tabla until I left my home for graduate research studies away to a reputed university.
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Throughout my doctoral research, I engaged myself more vigorously in Tabla and music. I started learning a keyed instrument called Harmonium. I even tried composing modern and fusion music among our student music groups of the university.
I sometimes visited the homes of celebrity musicians. Yes, some of the classical artists in India are quite approachable. They directed music even for top-rated Bollywood movies, but they remained down to earth.
Lately, I have discovered that I have lost touch with the classical and folk music of the world. Very recently, I started to sing with karaoke music. I may share some glimpses of my musical experiments here via my Odysee channel.
How much time do you dedicate to your hobbies?
Image 06: Photo by?Samson Katt?from?Pexels
Hobbies are very close to our hearts. Whatever insignificant subject it might be, any hobby activity can help elevate our mental spirit relatively high. Even we should try new hobbies that suddenly come to our mind.
Reading and writing are two inherent desires almost every human may have. Even in the good old days, when people didn't know the art of writing technology, ancient people used to tell stories from their everyday experiences.
Don't you remember Aesop's fables that a wise old human told the neighboring people?
Pursuing some time in hobby activities can enrich life in a big way.
You are worthy of love and care
Image 07: Photo by?Tim Mossholder?from?Pexels
I don't know about others. But, I often have a lack of empathy for myself. It may be due to a lack of self-confidence. It may also be due to a wrong notion about selfishness.
Lately, I discovered that I didn't pay enough attention to my inner core of the heart. I could have enjoyed life more sustainably if I had spent some degree of self-empathy for my own life.
I remember how much mental fulfillment I used to get by sketching whatever came to my mind during the first year of joining a government job in 1996. The simple needs of my mind are more important than any other earthly possessions.
Self-care is something many of us neglect. Our lives could be better lived if we paid enough attention to our mental needs.
We need to love ourselves more than we love others, the external world, planet earth, and the universe.
Bringing it altogether
Postscript
I always try to concentrate more on my core work. But, I also spend my precious time reading, learning, and growing. I enjoy extra-curricular activities as well. I am interested in connecting with fellow content creators who have matching subjects or overlapping interests.
I have been developing solutions for cybersecurity, data privacy, especially authentication technology and password security. I also write blogs here and elsewhere. I have started to create videos, and often appear on live video chatting.
I look forward to meeting like-minded bloggers from coherent domains interested in collaborative research and content creation.
* This article was originally posted on read.cash.
Cheers!
Cover Image:?I created the animation with my texts,?and a Photo by?Hassan OUAJBIR?from?Pexels Sources of all other?images?are mentioned below the respective images.
Disclaimer: All texts are mine and original. Any similarity and resemblance to any other content are purely accidental. The article is not advice for life, career, business, or investment. Do your research before adopting any options.
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Text Copyright ? 2022 Debesh Choudhury — All Rights Reserved
January 22, 2022.
#selfcare #selfimprovement #lifelessons #life #humans #writing #learningtimes #debeshchoudhury
chicken whisperer?voice-in-the-wilderness?the thinking man's circular knitting machine mechanic
3 年I struggle with many things, but, perhaps, this isn't something that I struggle with. I am my own best friend, and favourite co-worker... Oh, that sounds terrible, but, perhaps, true. I often look at parents with more than 1 child, and wonder whether I could have done it. Devote so much time of my precious life. I can't imagine running 4 kids here and there for sports, and the like. I really need my time for myself... Perhaps, I struggle with the opposite of this.
Personal Brand Expert, Certified Image Consultant, Business Etiquette Coach, Speaker and Writer
3 年Debesh Choudhury, PhD great post and so true. Thank you for this
PhD, MPhil, PGD, BSc, Chem.Tech. Eng, Text. Tech, C.Text ATI, C.Col SDC, Diplomate SDC ~ The University of Leeds
3 年Superb article Debesh Choudhury, PhD in total agreement with your views my dear friend; Thank You.!
CEO | Delivering AI-powered solutions—AI Agents, Chatbots, Voicebots, and Automation—that help growing businesses boost efficiency, streamline operations, and reduce costs.
3 年I agree. Thanks for sharing. Thanks ???