DON’T BE A JERK: SMALL BEHAVIORAL CHANGES FOR BIG IMPACT

INTRODUCTION?????

When we think of leadership, we often focus on acquiring new skills to become better leaders. However, what truly sets successful executives apart is their behavior. At the highest levels, technical skills are a given, but it's behavioral changes that make the greatest difference and impact.?

BEHAVIOR CHANGE IS OFTEN THE ONLY SIGNIFICANT CHANGE

However, the list of behavioral changes can sometimes be very long: active listening, communicating effectively, recognizing your team, giving and receiving feedback, coaching, managing conflict, regulating your emotions, displaying empathy, ...

For most people, when change feels overwhelming, they procrastinate and end up doing nothing.

Consequently, many executives struggle with behavioral change due to our natural resistance to it. However, it's precisely this change that can make or break a leader. An executive's behavior can either inspire or demotivate their team.

Many executives still believe that what got them where they are would lead them to where they want to go and when things don’t work out anymore for them, they might feel puzzled or stuck.

Here’s an example. An executive landed a CEO role for the first time in his career in a thriving multinational company. Three months after he arrived, his direct reports were already burnt out. Some of them went on sick leave while others said they would resign as soon as they can.

The CEO was great on paper, academically and professionally speaking. On the behavioral side, however, he had multiple shortcomings. He used to sigh and roll his eyes anytime someone speaks for a bit too long that what he expected. He used to criticize his direct reports’ work in group meetings and never say something positive or encouraging about it. He used to call them late at night, like 11pm, including the weekend.

The company’s founder then requested an emergency executive coaching for his new CEO (note of the author: I am in favor of preventative coaching for C-Suite executives in order to avoid reaching damage control coachings because, well, the damage has been done).

What changed?

Did all the board of directors suddenly performed less? No.

Did the CEO misrepresent his achievements on his resume? No.

A new CEO arrived and he wasn’t ready for the job behavior wise.

In his case, he would have a lot of things to start doing in order to become a “good guy”: being patient, saying thank you, recognizing people, changing his own schedule to start calling his team at reasonable hours, listening more, being polite, thinking before speaking, choosing carefully his words, …

That’s a lot to ask. No one has the time nor energy to go through a complete personality overhaul! Instead of trying to adopt numerous new behaviors, focus on stopping detrimental ones.

In other words, instead of trying to be the good guy/girl, simply stop being a jerk.?

SMALL CHANGES YOU CAN MAKE

Ceasing to be a jerk doesn't require learning new skills or undergoing a personality makeover.

Eliminating only a few recurring detrimental behaviors can significantly improve your relationships with your direct reports and your peers. You will also feel better because you would cut all the stress and negativity that come with being a jerk.

Simply stop:

·???????? Interrupting or dismissing others’ ideas.

·???????? Using condescending language or tone.

·???????? Micromanaging.

·???????? Criticizing your team’s work.

·???????? Arguing when receiving feedback.

·???????? Making excuses.

·???????? Telling someone who offers valuable ideas that you already know about them.

·???????? Starting your sentences with “No”, “But”, “You’re wrong”, “This won’t work”.

·???????? Lying or hiding information.

It doesn’t require you to go through a hard and long training. Nor to be the smartest person in the room.

All you need is to stop doing one or a few things.

?

REAPING A BIG AND POSITIVE IMPACT

?The corporate world – like the educational system - is known for rewarding people for taking action.

The quality of the annual performance reviews relies on the results that have been delivered, the good things you’ve done and the great behaviors you displayed. Little do they rely on you to stop doing something.

However, truth is that great successes can be achieved as well by not doing certain things: not scrolling through social media, not merging with that company, not hiring that CEO, not selling certain of your products/services to that customer because they don’t meet their needs, etc.

By simply stopping negative behaviors, you'll:

·???????? Improve communication and collaboration

·???????? Boost team morale and engagement

·???????? Increase trust and respect

·???????? Enhance leadership credibility

In a healthy workplace, people’s skills matter more than technical expertise.

It's time to redefine what makes a successful leader. It’s less about prestigious degrees and career and more about the way leaders behave, treat us, deliver bad news, listen to our ideas and concerns, make us feel heard and seen.

None of this is taught at school so leaders have to nurture a constant growth mindset to learn, improve and implement skills such as emotional intelligence, self-awareness, non-verbal communication and compassion towards others.

CONCLUSION

As executives rise through the ranks, behavioral changes become the most significant factor in their impact on coworkers and quality of life. By focusing on small changes, you can achieve big results. Remember, it's not about being the smartest person in the room or going through a complete personality overhaul. It’s about letting go of yourself and making it about others first by treating them with benevolence and respect.

?

NOTE ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Hasnaa Akabli is a passionate and caring executive and leadership coach whose biggest strength is to see people’s potential before they even see it for themselves.

She works with ambitious and successful C-level executives who have a vision to achieve. She believes they are fully whole, capable and resourceful. She helps them make those small changes in perspective and mindset that change everything in their lives and their careers.

More about executives and leadership development at: https://hasnaa-akabli.com