Don't Do It!

The KJR: John R. Nocero, Ph.D., MBA, CCRP, GCP, CC, ACB & Katherine J. Pryor, MPM

“I can’t believe you walked down the hall and blatantly ignored her. Aren’t you friends?”

"I can't believe you wrote that in an e-mail.”

“I can’t believe you said that at the conference; it came across critical and rude.”

It can be a wake-up when a friend or colleague points out questionable and uncharacteristic behavior. Perhaps you said something snarky, impolite, or hurtful. Or worse – you did something that presents a negative moral compass to the world – it was offensive, crass, prejudiced or plain nasty. It begs the question, is that the true you or were you having a bad day? Either way, when someone points out the poor behavior, it is time for a quick assessment and adjustment. Perhaps even an apology.

When a professional or personal relationship develops, we come to a beautiful point where we accept each other as we are – with all our greatness, merits, faults, and imperfections. But others, to whom we are less known, might not share the high opinions we hold of ourselves and one another. In today’s world, we assume that everything we say, write in an e-mail, post on LinkedIn, or tweet, will eventually end up in front of the one person in the whole world whom you would like to see it least. And they probably will see it; as may all your future employers, customers, colleagues, and friends.

The #1 item on our Not-To-Do List: Don’t say or write anything we don’t mean and won’t stand behind.

Most of us know that it’s great to keep a to-do list. It’s downright smart and keeps tasks at the forefront. Everyone’s heard of this method of organization and prioritization. Some just checked off “Read John & Katherine’s blog this week” on theirs. Whether your list is on your phone, your e-mail, or written using old-fashioned pen and paper (like Katherine’s), the idea is the same: you list in priority order the items you want to get done. Simple. Elegant. Powerful. Until, of course, you have more items that you can physically get done.

We borrowed the idea from Michael Hyatt and created a “Not-to-Do List” which includes things we are going to intentionally stop doing for the sake of greater productivity and professional relationships. According to Hyatt (2011), here’s why this is important: As people succeed at work, they attract more and more assignments; it is as if they turn into a task magnet. The problem is that you are a finite resource. To think that you are not is ridiculous and counter-productive to your success. The only way for you to continue to grow without going insane is to decide periodically what you are not going to do.

It’s tricky. But we have faith in you. Give it a try. And never-ever ever send or say anything you don’t mean.

References

Hyatt, M. (2011). Do You Have a Not-To-Do List? Retrieved June 17, 2017, from https://michaelhyatt.com/do-you-have-a-not-to-do-list.html