Don't compare your Chapter 1 with someone else's Chapter 10.

Today's post is something of a mind-bender. It is about reacting to other people's success. While inspiring, some people's achievements can discourage us. We see them thrive while we struggle, and if we allow it can mess us up emotionally.

Don't get me wrong...

There are things we can always learn from successful people.?

What is it that they are doing that we can mirror??Seeing other people achieve success can be a great motivator. It tells us what is possible with the right amount of focus and determination. But be careful you don't compare yourself to others.

If you think someone is too far ahead, you need to let that shit go. It's not good for one's emotional well-being and mental health. An idea might be to compare yourself with yourself. That works for me.

I'll compare yesterday with today and use it to improve and do things better tomorrow.

So while there are benefits to being inspired by others:

? Use it to drive you forward and as motivation.

? If it starts draining you, learn how to disconnect.

? It takes 2 secs to unfollow someone on social, yet you remain connected.

? Never be discouraged by the success of others because everyone is on their own journey.

? Remember, we all have to start somewhere.

Don't compare your Chapter 1 with someone else's Chapter 10.

Some people will have different experiences, situations, and skills than you do.

Use it as inspiration, but it should always continue you from achieving your dreams and goals.

Everyone deserves respect. But not everyone will celebrate your success. You see, you can't control what other people think about you. The only person you can control is you.?

Performance coach Seanie Meyler once asked me:

"Martin, what's the most important thing to you right now: Your character or reputation?"

A tremendous amount of freedom comes about from knowing the answer.

Things don't work out with people. When you try to control it, they rarely go the way you want. So you need to let it go, seriously.?

These last few weeks, I've listened to the following:

7 Strategies for Wealth & Happiness with Jim Rohn

Here's the lesson…

?? For things to change, Martin need's to change.?

?? It's not other things that need to change.?It's Martin that needs to change.?

?? For things to get better, Martin has to get better.?

Tuomo Vauhkonen recently shared a powerful post on LinkedIn:

5 Questions To Coach Yourself Every Morning!

?? No.1 - Am I moving toward my Goals?

?? No.2 - Which Process Do I Follow?

?? No.3 - What Skillsets am I developing Today?

?? No.4 - How can I simplify my act?

?? No.5 - Where am I losing Energy, or What Do I NOT Need to Focus on Today?

They are powerful questions to ask yourself.?It helped me think about the following:?

??Who do I need to speak to reach my goals?

?? What coaches and mentors can I access??

?? What books do I need to read??

?? What podcasts should I be listening to??

?? What needs to happen for a breakthrough??

Like many things, we can't just wish for any of this. It will require focus. What we focus on grows. If you aren't happy right now, you should ask yourself:?

How can I learn from the situation? Maybe it's the company you keep that's beating you down.?Here's what works for me:

?? Spend less time with people who are not pushing you toward your dreams.?

?? Invest time instead with people who will push you towards achieving those dreams.?

?? Surround yourself with people who won't allow you to hide but encourage you to be the best versions of YOU.

It will be hard if it's relatives, friends, and loved ones, and I get that. But it will be an essential step to make on your growth trajectory!?You must limit your time with these people, good intentions or not.?If someone is not pushing you toward your dreams and goals, are they seriously worth being around??

They'll often refer to the "tall poppy syndrome" in Australia and New Zealand.?

According to the Oxford Dictionary, it means:?

"a perceived tendency to discredit or disparage those who have achieved notable wealth or prominence in public life."

It refers to cutting a tall poppy down to size so it doesn't stand out. Whether you receive a promotion in work or excel in business, your peers criticise that success.?

Some examples of "tall poppy syndrome" from peers include:?

? Pointing out your flaws.??

? Downplaying success, e.g. "He paid for that."

? Reminding everyone of your "so-called" past.

? Exclusion from a particular group or event.

? Hiring your competitors instead.?

? Refusal to collaborate.

? Sly remarks.?

Tall Poppy Syndrome exists in schools, universities, communities and small towns. Arguably it's everywhere...?

It can cause a great deal of distress if you allow it.?You may be experiencing it, causing low self-esteem and overly self-consciousness in everything you do.?

Key indicators include:?

? Hesitating to contribute and share new ideas.?

? Losing ambition and not pursuing your dreams.

? Using negative self-talk and talking down your achievements to others and yourself.?

? Holding back from celebrating success.

Here are my thoughts on Tall Poppy Syndrome.?

Never let jealous individuals' negative words and actions stop you from outgrowing their limitations.?

Don't let those without the balls to do it themselves stop you from achieving your goals.?

?? Follow Your Tribe - Spend time with people who encourage you to be the best version of yourself.?

?? Give Gratitude - Compliment those around you on their success and achievements.

?? Collaborate - If you know someone in a similar line of work, see how you can partner rather than compete.?

?? Practice Self Care - Congratulate yourself and be proud of your achievements.?

?? Talk To Someone -?Never be ashamed to speak to a counsellor or health professional qualified to offer advice specific to your situation.?

??Try New Things - Seek out people and activities that reliably make you feel empowered. It could be learning a language, trying a new sport/hobby or joining a hiking group.?

?? Work on yourself. Be the best version of yourself because that's all you have.

If any of that resonates with you, could you do something??I'm confident you will feel a million times better.?I hope you have a great week. ??