Don’t Ask to Pick My Brain – Hire Me!
Brian Ahearn, CPCU, CTM, CPT, CMCT
Keynote Speaker | Cialdini Certified Coach & Consultant | Applying the Science of Influence to Boost Business Results ??
Let’s get right to the point: Don’t ask to pick my brain. Hire me.
If you’re a consultant, coach, or in any field where advice is your product, you’ve probably heard requests like “Can I pick your brain?” or “Can we hop on a quick call? I’d love your thoughts.” It sounds innocent, even flattering, but here’s the reality: They’re asking for free advice.
Time and expertise are valuable. When someone casually requests “just 30 minutes on Zoom,” they often overlook the years it took to gain that expertise and the countless hours spent mastering that skill. What might look like “just 30 minutes” is the tip of the iceberg in terms of what someone like me – and many of you reading this – have invested.
Business Isn’t Free – and Neither Is Expertise
As an entrepreneur, I quickly learned that every aspect of the business comes with a cost. In a corporate role, you have teams for marketing, accounting, and more. But when you’re solo, you either spend your own time on tasks or pay someone else to handle them. This reality hit me hard when I first left the corporate world: time is money.
When I seek advice from professionals like my accountant or lawyer, there’s a charge. And that’s not only fair; it’s essential. They’ve built their careers and expertise over years, and their clients respect that investment.
Why I’ve Had to Learn Boundaries
I work as one of only a dozen Cialdini Certified trainers globally, and I’m also a LinkedIn Learning instructor. My role centers on helping others develop their ethical influence skills, and I genuinely love doing this work. But, early on, I learned a valuable lesson: saying “yes” to every “pick your brain” request didn’t lead to new clients. Instead, it left me drained and devalued the advice I was sharing. And for those of you who charge for your expertise, I imagine you can relate.
Free advice isn’t fair to paying clients. People who have invested in your services deserve your full attention and commitment. They aren’t just supporting your business; they’re showing respect for your knowledge.
Why “Free” Speaking Gigs Often Aren’t Worth It
The same principle applies to speaking engagements. I used to accept “opportunities” where I wouldn’t get paid, hoping the exposure would land me clients. However, it rarely did. Now, I politely decline non-paying speaking offers and explain that I owe it to paying clients to keep a standard. Exposure is great, but compensation respects the effort and preparation required.
Respecting Expertise Means Valuing It
If you’re an entrepreneur, remember: it’s okay to set boundaries. A brief introductory chat is fine when time allows, but beyond that, your expertise has a price – as it should.
And for those seeking advice, consider this: You wouldn’t expect free counsel from your doctor, lawyer, or accountant. The same respect should apply to consultants and coaches who, like any professional, have invested heavily in their skills.
A Story to Illustrate the Value of Expertise
I’ll leave you with a classic story that captures this dynamic perfectly:
A manufacturing company faced a major breakdown and called a repair specialist. After a few minutes of assessment, the repairman grabbed a wrench, turned one screw, and the machine was up and running. His bill? $10,000. The client, shocked, asked, “$10,000 for turning one screw?” The repairman replied, “Turning the screw was $10. Knowing which screw to turn – that’s $9,990.”
Expertise isn’t just about actions; it’s about knowing the right action.
On LinkedIn, I share tips, insights, and stories daily – all for free. But if that content isn’t enough to help you implement solutions, consider it a signal: it’s time to hire me (or whoever’s expertise you seek).
So, the next time you think about picking someone’s brain, ask yourself: “Do I value their time and expertise enough to pay for it?”
Edited with ChatGPT
Brian Ahearn
Brian Ahearn is the Chief Influence Officer at Influence PEOPLE and a faculty member at the Cialdini Institute . An author, TEDx presenter, international speaker, coach, and consultant, Brian helps clients apply influence in everyday situations to boost results.
As one of only a dozen Cialdini Method Certified Trainers in the world, Brian was personally trained and endorsed by Robert Cialdini, Ph.D., the most cited living social psychologist on the science of ethical influence.
Brian’s first book, Influence PEOPLE , was named one of the 100 Best Influence Books of All Time by Book Authority. Persuasive Selling for Relationship Driven Insurance Agents was an Amazon new release bestseller. The Influencer , is a business parable designed to teach you how to use influence in everyday situations.
Brian’s LinkedIn courses on persuasive selling and coaching have been viewed by over 750,000 people around the world and his TEDx Talk on pre-suasion has more than a million views!
Diretor de Cria??o na Sol Propaganda
1 周Brilliant article, Brian. I've felt exactly like that along my career. And the story of the screw is really a classic one. Thanks again.
Cialdini Certified Coach in Ethical Persuasion, Speaker, Author 'How to Hear YES More Often', EMF PRO Trainer
1 周We’ll said Brian Ahearn, CPCU, CTM, CPT, CMCT . With what you do, and know, I quick realisation of what opportunities someone is missing can be adjusted with a tip that is explained in minutes. Yet the investment of time and money for you to build that ability to recognise it, was enormous.
Consulente di Direzione | Cialdini Certified Coach & Speaker | Business Angel & Startup Mentor | Rappresentante Commerciale nel GCC
1 周The community of vampire bats in Argentina emerges from their cave every night to bite cows for their daily blood meal. However, 2% of the bats remain in the cave. They are either too sick or old to fly and forage. When the other bats return, they regurgitate some of the blood they've collected to feed these unfortunate ones, ensuring their survival. Nature has deemed this worthwhile, as one day the healthy bats may need the same support when they are sick. It’s reciprocation. However, among those staying in the cave, there is a significant percentage who are merely freeloaders. They take advantage of others for free meals. The bats see this as an unavoidable cost to keep the reciprocity system functioning. As humans, however, we should remain vigilant, identifying those who exploit the principles of unity, and remove them from the community.
Founder + Consultant + Speaker for Insurance Professionals | Bound & Determined? Podcast Host | #digitalnomad
1 周So good and so spot on! Thanks for leading by example example.
Edutainer | Audit Leader Forum? | The Spiritual Campfire? | CAE Mentor | IA Training | CPA | Consigliere | Media Producer. Serving internal audit leaders, professionals, & spiritual hikers.
1 周Amen to this post Brian Ahearn, CPCU, CTM, CPT, CMCT! You nailed it. People would never ask their accountant, lawyer, doctor, dentist, etc... to pick their brain, or just give them a complimentary teeth cleaning, but those of us in our space hear it all the time. I can't take people picking my brain anymore either... since I don't have much left ;)