Is There a Dog on Your Plane?

I just received two negative text messages in a row from a friend who's flying today:

#1: I'm in seat 20 - had to put my bag in row 29. Ridiculous.

#2: Now both people next to me have dogs. 

I replied to the second one, "You are SO lucky" because that's how I'd feel. But my friend was complaining, rather than celebrating.

Is it reasonable to assume that everything will always go your way? Of course not. So what's the best possible way to react when things don't go your way?

Today, this person is responding with negative energy. He's venting to me, clearly stewing in his seat and fuming that this trip isn't going to be flawless in the manner that he hoped.

The other option is to recognize that a significant amount of the time, things are not going to go perfectly. At these moments, you might try this:

Simply be grateful for the miracle of life.

Comedian Louis CK says that people on planes should squeal in joy and amazement, "Oh my God! WOW!" He explains, "You're sitting in a chair... in the sky." This is a miracle, or something close to it.

Instead, it's tempting to make your stomach churn and your eyeballs nearly pop out of your head because it will take you five minutes longer to get off the plane.

You could use times like these to be grateful that your biggest problem is that a dog might drool on you.

You could be grateful that, although the Starbucks line is very long, you have enough money that you can waste a few bucks on something that would cost you 1/20th as much if you made it at home.

When your boss blows you off time and time again, you could be grateful that you have a job and skills that are valuable enough that other people will pay you to use them.

Of course, we all are vulnerable to these moments of irritation. I wasted two hours this morning trying to resolve an infuriating Catch-22 with one of my vendors. Did steam come out of my ears? Well, yes. But once this happened, I immediately took steps to calm myself down.

Did I do this in a vain attempt to be a perfect person?

Nope.

Did I do this because I'm better than anyone else?

Nope.

I did it because this is my life, and I don't want to waste it being grumpy, or sullen, or unhappy.

Every day, you face similar choices. Annoying stuff happens. Bad stuff happens. Sometimes even horrific things happen. You cannot control everything. But, with practice, you can control your reactions when things don't go your way.

It strikes me that most of us invest effort incorrectly. We should spend less effort trying to make everything perfect, and more effort trying to be grateful for the miracle of life, imperfections and all.

And if you bring your dog on a plane and you spot me, please be sure to come say hello.

Bruce Kasanoff is a ghostwriter for entrepreneurs, executives, and social innovators. He is the author of NEVER TELL PEOPLE WHAT YOU DO.