Do Your Actions Foster Inclusion or Exclusion?

A friend invited me to join Clubhouse recently. If you haven't heard already, Clubhouse is an Apple app – exclusive to iPhone users.

And whilst Clubhouse has a wide array of communities speaking to diverse topics, it’s still an exclusive app. When I clicked on the link, I was informed I was on the waitlist - and that it’s a long waitlist. It seems Apple is processing the invite responses by hand. ?? Or – shock, horror – I am unworthy of club membership. ??

The cynic in me feels Apple is simply following one of the oldest techniques in the influencing book. Clubhouse is so exclusive you have to be invited to join - and that fuels demand. The same was true of Bernie Madoff’s investment club. And whilst I am not likening Clubhouse to a Ponzi scheme, the principle remains the same.

Shortly after receiving the invitation, I was invited to a Clubhouse event run by an organization I volunteer with and whose very noble intent is supporting 1 billion people around the globe to practice emotional intelligence. My emotional reaction to that? A blend of frustration and despair. Why? Because inclusivity is a core value of mine and because the organization's noble goal speaks to inclusion - yet it’s not possible to be both inclusive and exclusive simultaneously. Statcounter’s research shows that 72% of the world uses an Android device. 27% use iOS.

This triggered thoughts around the behaviours we exhibit that are inclusive and those that are exclusive – and our experiences of those behaviours - including the extent to which these relate to bias. Here are a few to contemplate. You can probably think of many others.

Ignoring the No-Video Participants

Have you noticed yourself paying more attention and giving more airtime to people whose videos are on when online? It’s a natural human tendency to focus on another human face and seek visual feedback. I am aware that I need to make a concerted effort to check in with people with no video, but I’m also aware that I focus more of the time on the video-enabled. It took a while to realize that people might be embarrassed by their backgrounds, might not know how to enable a virtual background, might not have sufficient bandwidth, might be in a noisy home environment – and none of those were reason enough to ignore their participation. (Note that Clubhouse is audio only).

Playing Favourites

 Do you find yourself delegating to the person in your team who has the most experience, or whose personality gels most with yours? Either way, you are playing favourites and excluding other team members. If you always delegate the most challenging tasks to the most capable, you are excluding others from development opportunities. Of course, it will take more time to guide, coach and support the non-proficient team member, but it will serve your team and you more, short and long-term, to stop playing favourites.

The Present and the Remote

In Covid times, many teams are working remotely. Cast your mind back to the times when your meetings mixed face to face and remote team members. Did you focus more on the people present in the meeting room? However broad the bandwidth of the remote participant, there are always slight delays in response times for those out of the room. Did you make an effort to seek their input, to listen when they attempted to speak – or did you focus your attention on those in the room?

Are the brightest ideas and sagest inputs always to be found among those in the room? Evidently not. Yes how often do we focus our attention on those in the room. Given speaking up and being heard is essential in creating a positive impression, how much is this an impediment to the growth opportunities of those not in the room?

Or is yours more of a ‘follow the boss’ organization? Your attention goes wherever the boss is sitting?

One upside of many people working remotely, bandwidth being equal, is an equal opportunity to be visible. No one is allocated a bigger box on Zoom.

The Garrulous and the Reticent

These are two extremes. The Garrulous consume the bulk of the airtime and the Reticent speak up only when absolutely necessary. Ask yourself where you fall within the range of those extremes and whether that changes from situation to situation. Let’s not get into the reasons for these behaviours, let’s just acknowledge that the Garrulous occupy most of the airtime. Are they consistently filling that airtime with quality? Note that it’s hard for the Garrulous to stop speaking - they abhor silence - and this presents the Reticents with a significant challenge to exert influence.

Whilst it’s essential for all parties to self-monitor, it’s possibly most incumbent on the in-betweens, those mid-way between garrulous and reticent, to monitor and direct airtime allocation. For the Reticents, preparation and committing to contribute first in the discussion can help, as can consciously balancing the thinking to speaking ratio, and tallying the number of relevant contributions made in each discussion.

Other Non-Inclusive Behaviours?

I am sure you have examples of other acts of inclusion and exclusion, possibly:

• Not being invited to a WhatsApp group - or being invited but your comments ignored
• Exiting a meeting (back in those face-to-face days) only to see a circle of colleagues create a close formation - and you clearly excluded from the in-group
• Joining a committee, and as the new member, your comments being allocated less weight.

What Can You Do To Expand Inclusivity?

Besides recognizing when you are displaying any of the non-inclusive behaviors outlined above, you can scan the scenario and practice empathy:

• Consider who may be feeling uncomfortable and what you could do to create greater comfort for them.
• Monitor yourself for a week. Are you consciously or unconsciously avoiding certain groups or interactions, or dismissing views expressed by people who are like or unlike you?
• Keep at it. If excluded initially, keep speaking up, asking for opportunities, and seek supporters
• Seek supporters. Ask people to back up your statements, if you find yourself initially overlooked (check first they believe your views are valid)
• Create an inclusive tribe of your own - and extend invitations
• Go a step further: If you are recognized as a role model of inclusivity, what can you do to scale the impact of your inclusivity - and influence the inclusive behaviour of others?

Extending Inclusivity

Going beyond thinking of inclusivity in terms of humans, or products and services for humans, how can we extend a sense of inclusivity to our wider world? As humans, we decide how we treat not just others, but the environment we touch. To what extent are we, as individuals and as part of the organizations we work with, being inclusive of the environment in our actions and the decisions we take?

Andrea Stone is a leadership coach and consultant. She works with leaders and their teams to identify and leverage their strengths, solidify purpose and improve effectiveness, drawing on her multi-national and diverse experience in tech-driven industries globally and her expertise in enabling change.

Photo by Phu Nguyen on Unsplash

? Andrea Stone at Stone Leadership Coaching and Consulting Pvt. Ltd.