Do you want what you say you want, or what you already have?

Last week, I had an extraordinary Discovery Session with a prospective client.

I want to share how the call unfolded and the profound insight that emerged—not just for the client, but for me too, and potentially for you as well.

The conversation began with the client sharing her excitement about a side hustle she recently launched.?

It’s a disruptive business with immense potential, and she has the energy to make it something huge.?

That much was clear from the start.

So I asked her?

“What’s your dream for the business?”

She responded?

“To make it a billion-dollar business within two years.”?

Her eyes lit up with excitement.

The conversation then shifted to whether she should accept voluntary redundancy and go all in, or stay put and build it slowly.?

I challenged her to explore her personal ‘why’ for growing the business and asked?

“When you have this billion-dollar business, what will you do?”

She paused and then said

“I’ll travel more, spend more time relaxing, visit friends and family more.”

I reminded her that saying ‘yes’ to something often means saying ‘no’ to something else.?

“What would saying ‘yes’ to making this a billion-dollar business mean saying ‘no’ to in your life right now?” I asked.

She paused for a long while until a tear appeared in the corner of her eye—often a sign we’ve touched on something important.?

She replied?

“Travel, relaxing, and friends & family.”

Sometimes as high achievers we relentlessly pursue a goal because we believe it will make us happy, not noticing that what we want is right in front of us.?

Think of the executive who works relentlessly to provide for their family, missing that what the family needs most is their presence.?

Consider the self-development junkie ferociously consuming productivity books, hoping for an extra 1% so they can relax a little more, when instead they could simply put down the book and chill.

If any of this resonates, there’s nothing wrong with you, and I’m right there with you.?

As high achievers, we often fall into the trap of believing that chasing big achievements will create the fulfilment we seek.?

In fact, the fulfilment we are looking for is sometimes just on the other side of permission.

• Permission to relax into our body.
• Permission to be right where we are.
• Permission to enjoy the experience as it is.
• Permission to be loved just as we are.
• Permission to know we are enough.

Here are a few questions to support your self-reflection:

1. Where can you give yourself more permission to enjoy what you’re currently chasing?
2. Are you denying yourself the opportunity to enjoy your life as it is right now? If so, why might that be?
3. What are you saying 'no' to by relentlessly pursuing your goals? How does this align with what you truly value?
4. What small changes can you make today to start living the life you want right now, rather than waiting for a distant future?
5. In what ways can you affirm to yourself that you are enough just as you are?

Stay courageous,

Graham

Curious about coaching? Here's 3 ways you can learn more...

1. Book a 30-minute intro call with me here and ask me anything about coaching
2. Download my FREE Masterclass: From Fear to Freedom: How to transform your inner critic into your inner coach. Grab your copy here
3. Check out some kind words from my clients here