Do this, and you too will have an amazing 2021!

Do you set and forget New Year's resolutions? I mean, set a resolution only to forget about it within a few weeks, or even days? Hopefully not - maybe you are one of the few that actually set a serious resolution for 2020. How did it work out for you? I can hear you scoff, "We had a pandemic, remember?". Of course we did, and that is the reason for this article: to give hope to those that lost hope due to the pandemic.

The tradition of setting New Year's resolutions is indeed a great one, and I am a huge proponent of reviewing goals regularly. Many people find tremendous value in proper goal setting, and I am one of those. However, as with many traditions, the true value often gets lost only because it becomes something that everybody seemingly does. This is like when the masses try to outwardly emulate a spiritual master without any fundamental understanding of what the guru is doing on the inside. Instead of falling into the same trap when it comes to goal setting, I have a better proposal for you this year…

Firstly, some context: A survey conducted in 2018 by Strava, a social network for athletes, concluded that 80% of their respondents reported dropping their resolutions on average by January 12th each year. Now, I must admit that I found that conclusion rather alarming when I read it, simply because I expected athletes to be more motivated to achieve goals than the general public. Is it then safe to say that this figure is probably less for the general public? Maybe they give up on their resolutions after only one week???

Bear in mind that just remembering what your goal was for the new year does not count. Neither does having a goal that has an undetermined or future starting date… Nope, the real question is how long do you take targeted action toward your goal? Or, stated differently, how long do you persist in the active pursuit of your goal?

So, let us get to the point. There is no value in setting a goal that will be forgotten in a few weeks because you ignored every opportunity to start at the goal - like having a goal to lose weight, but failing to start an exercise program, a specific diet, or breaking with known bad habits. In fact, the damage of setting and forgetting a goal is much greater on the psyche of a person than the benefits of having a wonderful goal in the first place, as it sets people up for failure. 

Most people fall into the trap of a downward spiral of disenchantment as they lose faith in their ability to keep a self-directed commitment. You see, the lingering effects of failing to achieve a goal you set echoes on for many years, reinforcing the negative self-talk that keeps reminding you of who you really are. This negative self-talk is one of the key elements that contribute to your self-image. This is also a part of what we refer to as the paradigm. And believe me, changing your paradigm alone without the assistance of an objective and uncompromising outsider holding you accountable to your commitments is near impossible, as all our life coaching clients openly admit.

So here is the key to having a successful 2021 and the remainder of your life if you take this advice to heart today. First, you need to take a step back and zoom out to see the bigger picture before zooming in for the details:

1. Decide what it is you ultimately want to have, be, or achieve in life.
2. Make a firm decision that you will do whatever it takes to become the person above.
3. Decide on a date that you feel comfortable with that you can achieve this goal.
4. Gather information on what is needed to achieve this goal and start the planning process.
5. Break it down into smaller tasks, steps, or bite-sized chunks that you can chew easily and tick off the checklist.
6. Take action, checking daily if what you do takes you closer to your goal.
7. Check progress regularly and make adjustments to the plan without ever taking your eye off the goal.

Reading through the list briefly will make sense to everybody, and most people will say it is old news. Unfortunately, most people immediately get stuck when executing the action plan. They need guidance on the boundaries for step 1, or what a firm decision looks like in step 2, and completing every step after. Thoughts that typically plague each of them include:

• Is the goal realistic? Maybe the goal is too big…
• How will I be able to do this? I don't have the time or the money…
• How will I get around the next obstacle? This is too difficult…
• I knew it – I was too ambitious. I'm giving up…

If you get stuck, you may want to consider getting expert help. Paradigm Life Coaching specializes in success and performance coaching. This is what we do – help people turn their dreams into reality. Our main coaching program takes you through the entire process of setting and achieving huge goals using a facilitated 6-month coaching program. The program empowers people with fresh insights to understand and practically explore their hidden capabilities and powers that help them live a life of their own choosing instead of living by default. Living on purpose is one of the most satisfying experiences any person can have. Watch our FREE, on-demand webinar called Mission: I'mPossible to learn more about how you can turn your wildest dreams into reality in a much shorter time you ever thought possible. You simply cannot afford to place your dreams on hold any longer.

Taking a structured approach to goal setting, in reality, eliminates the need for any haphazard annual New Year's resolution, as you will be very clear by the end of the year on what your next steps would be. If your resolution does not support your bigger goal, you will very quickly realize it is pointless having it as a resolution at all, as it will only detract you from what is most important. However, in the spirit of having New Year's resolutions, you may find it refreshing to challenge yourself even harder as you decide to speed things up, take action in larger chunks, or take more significant risks in the new year to see your goal reached quicker, better or even expanded because of increased confidence that you know you actually do whatever you set out to do. 

My advice to you today? Make your resolution that you will set a worthy goal based on what you would like to be known for at the end of your life, and then resolutely do all it takes to achieve that goal. It helps to think what you would like to hear at your own eulogy or even see engraved on your tombstone. Don't hurry into all the details right away, but make a promise to yourself now that you will set time aside without any disturbance within the next few days to decide what you really want from life and then commit to doing it. This will stand you in much greater stead than a quick answer to somebody's question on your goals for 2021. Your goal may take many years to achieve, and that is fine. Your resolution is not to achieve the new year's goal but to identify, plan, and START working toward it. That's it!

Here's a final thought in conclusion: Remember the power of any dream lies in the action you take during your waking hours while keeping your dream vividly in your mind…

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Francois Nel is the co-founder of Paradigm Life Consultants operating as Paradigm Life Coaching and can be reached at www.paradigmlifecoaching.net. Paradigm Life Coaching empowers people to take control of their thinking and ultimately their own reality and is presently rolling out an exciting campaign called Mission: I'mPossible. It will help you become a better you! Visit the link and register for a FREE, secretive, and action-packed webinar!