Do you remember your first car?

I was excited to find a 1956 Thunderbird in running condition with both a hardtop and porthole widows -- and a rag top! My dad rebuilt the engine on evenings and weekends with my help; I partially refurbished the interior. Could never stop the oil drip. Still needing work, I sold this classic to pay for grad school.

We love to talk about our first car because, for many, it represents our transition into adulthood.

How do you respond when someone asks you about your first car, first major purchase, or life-changing decision? Everyone has a story about the major step into a world of responsibility: being an adult.

A good opening question to get to know someone is to ask them to describe their first car.? We all seem to get dreamy-eyed recalling that first car – cherished memories and experiences from a pivotal time. ?When you think of your first car, what do recall about that first step into adulthood?

As interesting as the topic is to me, owning a car is not the topic of this article, nor is it a right of passage globally. We can explore the topic. However, I would like to move past the object where we center our transition from childhood to adulthood to examine the decision. Each decision reflects the mores, location, customs, and traditions of the maker. Leaders must be self-aware; we want leaders who are capable of understanding our life phases and what we experience. We seek to shine a light on the trail we choose.

FIRST ROLE MODEL AND MENTOR

Like me, perhaps one of your parents or an adult role model was involved in making that first life-affirming decision. We emulate people we respect, so it is often more than the make and model of the vehicle that attracts our interest. I observed how my parents addressed the need to work, maintain a home, raise a family, and add adventure to our lives. I cannot help but compare their choices to my choices today to maintain harmony in a busy life.

My mother was a beautician who operated a small business in a small room in the basement of our house. Our home is visible in the background of the accompanying photo of a very dirty Ford Thunderbird. Note the large glass window on the house. I still recall playing with my siblings in the yard while my mother and father lifted the Pennsylvania mica stones to secure them on the wall around that window.

My father held great pride in that house, stating that he built it himself, from the initial digging to the roofing. Although each task was new to him, he learned what was required, ?hiring professionals only for the electrical wiring, water, and power. He was an engineer who amassed over 150 patents. Although he never graduated high school, he was one of an eight-member major firm engineering design team credited with key scientific innovations we rely on today. I recall my first drawing to receive a star proudly displayed on the schoolroom wall: I attempted to create a blueprint of our house.

CONTINUOUS LEARNING

Very few of us built our homes or watched our parents build the house we lived in. What would your life be like if you never owned a car or a house or made that one critical decision as you accepted the responsibilities of an adult?? Discussing my book MOVING ‘ON BY!’ Harnessing my sled dog team’s instinct to win, (AMAZON) readers are often surprised at how the TALES FROM THE TRAIL stories of actual adventures so closely align with the LEADERSHIP CASE STUDIES describing events many of us face at work. In the book, I talk about self-coaching and seeking your Trail markers to achieve your personal and career goals.

The speed of technological advances has made continuous learning even more critical today. While we may not need to sit in a classroom for formal education, we must research new findings and obtain critical information. Just as important to our development as gaining knowledge is challenging ourselves, connecting with others, and choosing to accept risk as part of life.

As children, we learn by observing others and from our own experiences. The decisions we see others make, actions, and responses shape our instincts and influence our future choices. Our memories and our history add to our wisdom. It is what we recall instinctively when we seek to make a decision. ?We continue to broaden our knowledge by learning from mentors, ?working with a coach, listening to the stories of others, and reading case studies to vicariously experience a new situation through the actions of others. Each moment we spend reflecting on these experiences helps us understand our values and motivations more deeply.

CONTEMPLATION

You can use any strong recollection of a life-changing event for self-coaching. Quietly consider the event by applying the who, what, when, where, and why questioning process, considering your first major decision as an adult. To begin, think back to…

· Who did you choose as friends, confidants, and mentors?

· What did you invest your time in? What was important?

· When did you first realize you were an adult and that your choices were your own?

· Where did those first road trips and the exploration of adulthood take you?

· Why is it valuable to understand your past choices, experiences, and evolving values?

The transition period involves absorbing new ideas and experimenting with new outcomes, whether in the driver’s seat, climbing to a work platform, or standing behind a team of sled dogs. We create our unique learning environment with the drive to acquire the self-awareness to lead and achieve our goals. How does answering these questions help you understand how you learn and how you share your knowledge with others?

Consider what inspires you to act and take a risk. We learn best and create trusted working relationships when we are committed to developing others, particularly when building a team. Interestingly, we may be surprised at how guiding someone's success enables us to succeed. We live our lives responding to change, learning to make decisions, and testing ways to guide ourselves while acknowledging our vulnerabilities.

COACHING AND SELF-COACHING

You are an experienced adult committed to your career. Executive Coaching provides objectivity that enables you to recognize habits, develop self-awareness, define values, and inspire the commitment required to build and lead a team. My coaching programs provide the tools to ensure your success. It all begins with a 70-page assessment report about you. The first half of the document includes interviews with colleagues and peers that you select to help you see how others see you; the second half provides the results of your Hogan Leadership Assessment, a powerful self-profile enabling you to capture your views of yourself. Comparing how others see you to how you see yourself is the starting point for a successful coaching engagement.

As you review your past, consider how the changes you made have affected others. I am thrilled when a client describes our coaching engagement as revealing and rewarding. Recently, a biotech leader commented that his development positively affected the company’s advancement. As he became more aware of the questions to ask and the importance of including every team member in decision-making, others followed his lead. He has received two promotions during the past two years, and the company has significantly increased in size and reach.

The rewards of formal coaching extend well after the engagement. The coaching process lends itself to introducing the concept of self-coaching. Leaders who employ self-coaching are equipped to inspire the high-potential employees they mentor to actively and consistently acquire new knowledge and skills.

NOW THAT YOU KNOW…

As you consider your response to the questions listed, WHAT DID YOU? LEARN? Would you pick the exact first car or make the same major decision into adulthood if you knew then what you know now?? And, more importantly: Where are you going from here?

It’s a new year, and it's time for you to take the lead. Learn more about yourself by identifying your habits and your trail markers to master the skills you desire.? Contact me for a quick chat, as I enjoy speaking with people who know what they want or need. Be certain to visit www.mtmcoach.com to read references from some of the many talented leaders I have had the privilege to coach. I hope you become one of this prestigious group.

Be inspired and inspiring,? Dr. Lucille Maddalena

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