26 tips to Manage your Manager

Do you need to Manage your Manager?

Whether you like it or not, you are managing your #manager either successfully, apathetically, or miserably! Yes, they’re human too, yes! But what makes them different is their expectations, personalities, lack or desire to control, ego, competitive peers, pressure from top, authorization levels, communication skills, acumen, own confidence, etc. And that’s just at the tip of the iceberg on who they are when they don on that role.

There’s a lot of pressure and expectations placed on #managers to be their best possible self while #leading teams. There are millions of books, trainings, and models that help managers becoming better with their teams. But very few resources that help you manage your manager and to treat them right!

Managing one manager should be relatively easy, right?  Managers on the other hand have multiple people to manage and lead. And the expectations from them are sometimes almost God-like.        

Here are 26 tips to help you succeed:

1. Each manager wants to be informed. Whether they’re micro-managers or laissez-faire, every manager would like to know what’s happening. The last thing they want is to be surprised. Keep the workflow-progress updated and cc them on vital information.
2. Come with possible solutions to your problems. Don’t just go to your manager expecting to be spoon-fed with the plug & play solutions. Discuss and debate possible solutions with them.
3. Comply with their expectations and show commitment to results. What this means is that listen to what they have to say and put it to use. However, if you find a better way to achieve a result, then do that instead. But keep your manager informed of those detours.
4. Report failures early. The best managers are ok with failures if they are in the know that it’s trending towards doom. Even the worst managers will fume over mistakes for a moment, but sooner or later they trudge along towards action.
5. Find their ‘best time’ to have difficult conversations. Yes, everyone has that ‘particular’ time embedded into their physiological clocks, where they are more accepting, inviting, and positive. Morning, brunch, afternoon, or evening, after meals, during a smoke break, after a good meeting, etc. Find that best time to approach them.
6. Show them you are listening even if you disagree.: Paraphrase what you have heard them say and then suggest an alternative to what you’ve been asked to do. If you have to say no, give reasons why. And if you feel like saying no and can’t articulate it yet then buy some time. If you don’t have a valid enough reason to say no…say yes!
7. Respect a manager’s feedback. In fact, ask for feedback proactively. Don’t just ask general feedback questions but ask about jobs where a manager has observed your performance. E.g., What could I have don’t better in that last presentation? How could I have handled that stakeholder better?
8. Give ideas but don’t expect them to be implemented. Share your recommendations and opinions and at the same time be aware that sometimes, your manager may not be able to use them, or doesn’t want to use them or hasn't really understood it well enough.
9. When giving recommendations, don't use downgraders or disclaimers such as "I'm not sure, I may be wrong, it’s not my place to say this, etc..'' Say what you have to say with conviction. And if they say no to you, review your pitch and try again. If you give up easily on an idea....don't bother picking it up again.
10. Be curious about them: They’re human to, right! They need to be listened to; they need to be made to feel important. They have challenges, they have backgrounds, and they have context. Ask them about their experience, listen to their woes about their management.
11. Be ok, with little or ambiguous information. Many times, your manager may not be able to share everything, either because they’ve been told not to share, or they just don’t know themselves.
12. In times of crisis, adhere to what’s been asked of you and suggest ways to make things better. Don’t be disappointed if your ideas are not considered. Provide discretionary effort by doing more than what’s expected. Managers remember how you acted in times of crisis more than any other job.
13. Check if they have double-stretched a goal themselves. Managers may add to an already stretched goal, hoping that you’ll deliver more than what was initially expected. Ask them, what’s the best result, what’s an expected result and what’s a result that can get your team in trouble.
14. Share more about the issue, not the person(s) involved in the issue. Most managers don’t like it when you complain or berate others colleague or stakeholders (unless they agree to it themselves!) E.g., Tell them how you are not able to get the information on time from the stakeholder, how it is impacting your work and list everything you have tried, but hasn’t worked.
15. Ask for support and be ready to be challenged. Don’t shy away from asking for help from your manager. At the same time be ready to be challenged by your manager to produce your own solution.
16. Don't allow managers to just take over your work. If you put your hands up every time they execute your tasks, then you will never learn.. Ask them if you can watch them do that task and learn from them. Ask them what they would do differently.
17. Know that you may not be able to execute a job in the same way your manager would do it. Show them what makes your way of performing different. Most managers don't worry about deviations in low criticality jobs. Bring in an improvement or change from the norm and consult with your manager so that its co-created.
18. Be ok with managers who may not have all the answers. In such an event, the best thing to do is to co-create a solution or an approach to find that solution.
19. Show seriousness and intent to improve based on your manager’s feedback. Send them an email outlining the feedback and list your action plan to improve on it.
20. Avoid jumping the escalation matrix, without letting them know. Keep them informed, even if its urgent that you speak to someone else about an issue and not them.
21. Ask if you can take on some of their responsibilities. It may be a simple job of making reports, sending post meeting action plans, going to some regular meetings, or teaching new employees. Show resourcefulness and desire to help them out.
22. Be a good team player by showing that you are ready, willing, and able to support the team when it needs you. Acknowledge others and help those who could do with your help.
23. Be authentic when working with them. Tell them why you need something, be honest with your short comings, ask for help, show genuine interest in getting the job done and be empathetic to their problems.
24. Allow them to manage you. Don't be disheartened if a manager must step in, assist you, point out mistakes. It’s better to have a hands-on manager who cares about your performance rather than one who's just not involved.
25. Show that you can be trusted. Get them inputs that they can use to make decisions or inform upwards themselves. When accepting any appreciation, speak on behalf of the team and recognize your manager's efforts. Be sensitive with information that only your team, your manager and you would know.
26. Make them feel as part of the team. When managers are excluded from unofficial team rituals, they feel not only left out but also that something sinister is brewing within the team against them. Involve your manager in social activities such as team lunches, parties, game nights etc. They’re human after all!

There are many types of managers. And each of these tips differ for them. Having said that, managers can be different to different team members. They can change based on how they’re generally feeling, the pressures they deal with their own motivation levels. The best way to manage upwards, is to perform despite obstacles.?

Which of these tips have helped you in the past? Please do comment with the tip #number and your opinion.

Kenneth Paul Lewis is an expert leadership and management trainer and facilitator. He is an expert #OKR consultant and executive coach. He is also an entrepreneur, seed-investor and on the board of directors of a few organizations.

Write to [email protected] to coach your organization's leaders and teams on leadership, team working, strategy and OKRs.