Do you have the need to constantly "prove yourself"?

Many people who find themselves burnt out are actually subconsciously trying to endlessly “prove themselves”.

And…one reason you’ve worked yourself straight into burnout is because you have a subconscious wound around money and worthiness.?

And until that wound becomes conscious (and properly worked through), you’ll keep repeating the same patterns that drive you toward trying to prove yourself with your work ethic.?

Burnout doesn’t just happen…rather, there is an internal experience that sets us up for this.?

The subconscious wounds we have around money and our own worthiness are actually limiting beliefs based on our painful past learning.?

Let’s unpack 2 examples:?

When I was a design engineer, I didn’t like asking for help.? I had graduated from mechanical engineering school and thought that I needed to know all the answers.? Why else would I have been hired?? I needed to take everything I learned and automatically apply it to my job.??

I was terrified to ask questions and be found out as an imposter.? I really thought someone would think that I just “got on by” in college, and wasn’t qualified… and then in my mind, I’d end up losing my job.

Over asking a simple question.?

If I unpack this a few levels further to find the limiting belief, I can see that some of my painful past learning told me that I had to be smart.? I was valedictorian when I graduated high school, and I was always trying to prove myself.??

I didn’t want to be ‘just the pretty girl” and throughout my life, someone was always commenting that I was “more than just a pretty face”. They meant it as a compliment, but to me it became part of my worth.

I had to show everyone I was more than a pretty face.?

This led me to NOT seek out help from my colleagues and instead, waste precious time working out problems for hours because I wasn’t sure the answer I had was right.??

I couldn’t afford to make a stupid mistake because it would threaten my entire identity as the “smart one”.?

And even deeper, I really struggled at times in engineering school, and thought it was incredibly difficult…so maybe I really didn’t deserve to be a true engineer anyway??

My subconscious wounds came out to play with my work ethic as I bent over backwards trying to make my employer proud of me and all that I brought to the table.

The subconscious wounds we have around money and our own worthiness are actually limiting beliefs based on our painful past learning.?

Another example that comes to mind is something I see play out quite often-?

When you get that hefty pay increase, or you win that big contract… and then you work yourself ragged trying to please everyone.?

In your subconscious, you don’t feel good enough to be earning that amount of money and this new identity of being a “high earner” hasn’t been integrated yet.??

So you end up having a very bad time- you know the drill: you work late, you can’t shut your brain off on weekends, you don’t execute a healthy work/life balance, you lack boundaries.??

This is where burnout comes in, over time, as you drive forward always trying to meet some high expectation of what you think that identity looks like.?

If we unpack it deeper and deeper, we see money stories come to the surface.?

Growing up in a poor household.?

Hearing people we love say things like “money is at the root of all evil”.

Knowing our rich neighbor never sees his kids. But man he sure makes a lot of money!?

All of this is internalized deep into our subconscious.?

We can see here that burnout gets driven from the INTERNAL experience, not just outside expectations, which is where a lot of people get stuck in their healing.?

Many people who don’t overcome burnout are placing the burden on their employer or their clients- or some other external factor.?

“If they would just be less demanding… then I could heal and have better work life balance!”

When actually, that couldn’t be further from the truth on what it takes to truly heal!??

When we are able to bring the subconscious stories, trauma, and all that we’ve internalized TO OUR AWARENESS, we begin to understand how we’ve become burnt out, AND what we need to do to make sustainable, lifelong transformation.?

We can GET and STAY healthy.

?But there’s a caveat…?

Because it’s not just as simple as identifying a limiting belief and then VIOLA.??

Magic wand.

You’re all better now.?

NOPE.??

Understanding our limiting beliefs doesn’t actually dissolve them.?

But you know what does???

A body FIRST approach where we tune into our nervous system and create a new set point for ourselves in a safe, regulated body and mind.?

Affirmations are great but they aren’t the solution.?

Thinking about your new identity is great but it’s not the full picture.?

And even UNPACKING and trying to UNDERSTAND your whole childhood won’t actually dissolve the belief that is disrupting your success.?

Cognitive approaches don’t heal trauma.

This work has to pair with the body first, body-regulated way of being as we work with the limiting belief and your subconscious wounds.?

That is where all this “stuff” is actually stored…the BODY.?

I hope this clarifies so much for you!

And of course, did you know I have a program that focuses on exactly what I’ve talked about in this post???

If you need help in this area, DM me.? I work with folks in a 2 month program to unpack and DISSOLVE these limiting beliefs at their root.??

I also give you an owner’s manual of your very own nervous system so you can apply the tools you learn to every stressor, hardship, or limiting belief that comes your way now and in the future, too.?

We work with stealthy tools and regulation practices that anyone can do- without making a big show of it (so no wild flailing around, intense crying, or dramatic breathing)...which means you’ll have a toolbox FULL of strategies you can implement in front of a client, while your kids are having a melt down, in a heated discussion with your partner, or while you’re on zoom discussing that important deadline- so you can get calm, cool, and collected in the tough times.?

And, we pair all of this with our new identity through vision casting, self-contracts, and a code of honor- so you have a crystal clear picture of where you’re going from here and execute on the next level for yourself!?

We do this without sorting through traumatic memories and my clients are able to make rapid progress because we focus on a body first, bottom up approach- one that has decades of research behind it and that I’ve been mentored + trained to do with my clients.

The investment for the 2 month program is $2,222- incredibly small compared to the massive progress my clients have made in the short time we are together, overcoming what has been holding them back from really going after their dreams and achieving those money milestones- plus mastering the skills that you will come back to throughout the rest of your life.?

I also have a retainer service for those who want to continue working with me after our program has ended, so if you love the support of a coach and want long term support- I gotchu!? The investment for that is $500 per month and you can start or stop it at any time as a returning client.??

If you’re interested, send me a DM and I’ll ask you a couple of questions to see if it’s a good fit, and then we can get started as soon as next week if so!