Do You GATE It?

I typically get to work early, and it is well before the sun comes up.? I office relatively close to an interstate highway and there is auto dealership at the light when I make a turn. When I go in early, the access to the dealership is restricted with a GATE. If I go later in the morning, the GATE is open.? The GATE is only two feet tall and is more of a restriction and barrier than a security device, however it does restrict vehicles from entering before they are open.? Occasionally, I see an employee opening the lock then opening the GATE.? Do you have a GATE in your personal or professional life?? Let’s see what we can learn from a GATE:

Give ??????????????????????????????????

Give access.? Having a GATE allows us to limit access.? I know that may sound contrary in today’s world; however we have to limit access into our lives and to those we love and care for.? Notice the word “give.”? That means we allow or transfer something of value to someone else.? If someone is controlling or forcing their way into our lives, that is not giving access.? We must make sure we have a GATE and just like the dealership I drive past, we have to make sure the GATE has a proverbial lock on it. ?Have you ever given access to your life or those you care about, and it did not work out?? That is the thing about GATEs, we can open the GATE and allow entry, however there are times when people who want to cause harm or ill will come through the GATE and we have to address it.? Make sure you are monitoring who is coming through your GATE and take action if you find someone who should not be inside the GATE.?

Accept???????????????????????????????

Accept the boundary. ?As hard as this may seem, we have to accept the boundary or boundaries we set when we establish a GATE.? The dealership has a GATE to restrict vehicular traffic during the hours that it is closed, and nobody is there to watch over their inventory.? The GATE is a boundary to limit who can come in.? We all need a GATE and to set boundaries with those in our lives who we don’t want to have access to certain parts of our lives. Do you have someone you need to set a boundary with?? We also have to accept the limitations of the GATE in our lives.? The dealership limits vehicles from entering while they are closed, but it doesn’t stop someone from stepping over the GATE and entering to look at vehicles when nobody is there.? Make sure you set the right boundary for you and what you are trying to protect.? Make sure it can’t just be stepped over to come in.? Establish the right boundary then accept the purpose and intent of it.

Timing???????????????????????????????

Timing is everything.? If I drive by the dealership before their hours of operation, I can expect the GATE to be closed.? I should also expect the GATE to be open during their normal hours of operation. The days that I leave the office, the GATE is open.? As you establish the GATE in your life, people around you should know what to expect.? They should know when you are opening the GATE and when to expect the GATE to be closed.? Trust the timing.? Our challenge is setting the boundaries and the times that we need to have our GATE open or closed.? The more those around you know what to expect, the easier it will be to have balance in your life.? You may need to keep your GATE closed for a period in your life, however that does not mean you can’t open it later or when you are older or in a better place.? You need to ask yourself, have you been setting inconsistent boundaries with anyone in your personal or professional life?? What do you need to do to establish your “hours of operation?”? Who do you need to communicate with to let them know what or who you will allow through your GATE and what or who you will not allow?? Make sure they know what to expect.

Enter??????????????????????????????????

Enter or exit? Open or closed.? Depending on what side of the GATE you are on, it can impact how you view it.? Just like the GATE can restrict access to who can access you and your life, it can also be a restriction to someone who is behind the GATE when it is closed.? When you read that, did you think of someone who you need to exit your GATE, or someone who you need to keep inside to protect them?? The best thing about a GATE is that you get to set when it is open and when it needs to be closed.? You get to approve who you allow to enter and who you ask to exit.? Your GATE can look the same from both sides, however each side has a different purpose.? It is the same GATE, it is truly meant to limit who enters and who leaves.? Who do you need to allow to enter and who do you need to ask to leave?? Who do you need to ask to stay inside the GATE?

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When was the last time you checked your GATE?? Is it easy to open and easy to close?? Do you close it, or do you ever open it?? Does your GATE have a lock so others can’t easily open it?? Every day we grant people access to our lives at work and in our personal lives. Ultimately, we need to understand that there are different levels of access, and review who we give access to.? “Give” is the key word. Once we establish who we give access to, we need to determine who we do not allow access to and restrict their access.? Once you set the boundary or your proverbial GATE, you need to accept the boundary.? Timing is everything.? Those boundaries can change over time; however you need to lock your GATE when it needs to be locked.? Others in your life need to know what your GATE is and why it is there.? You get to determine if it is an entrance or an exit.? That may sound elementary; however some people don’t know the difference, and you have to let them know.? It is your GATE and you get to choose when it is open and when it is closed, so decide and don’t feel bad about it.? If? you need help establishing a GATE, find someone you trust and ask for help.

G – Give access.

A – Accept the boundary!

T – Timing is everything.

E – Enter or exit?

Stay safe and stay well!

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