Do you ever fall into THIS TRAP in your business?

Do you often find yourself trying to control everything in business?

Many leaders naturally find themselves in a position where they want to personally make sure things are running smoothly and that everyone is getting their job done.?

Yet, what they might not realise is that this type of approach only produces stress.?

?In turn, that stress leads to poorer performance, lower team engagement and mediocre results.??

But let me ask you, what would happen if you were to let go of control and replace it with TRUST instead??

This might feel counterintuitive at first, but if we reflect on what control is and what triggers it, we quickly realise it comes down to trust.?

Trust in others. Trust in ourselves.?

In my work with founders, I’ve observed that many seemingly fall into the “being in control” trap because of not trusting others eg. their team.?

When looking deeper at this issue though, beyond external factors, I’ve also observed that founders who battle with a need for control are often hiding a self-trust issue.?

This might be surprising, but when we fully trust ourselves, our impact, our skills - we can completely let go of control.?

Doubting ourselves means we feel a need to prove ourselves, to show that we are capable to reach those big results. And of course, as business founders, this comes out as wanting to control everything and everyone’s performance, not being capable of trusting things will get done and will be alright.?

It’s an unhealthy cycle, but one many leaders find themselves in, without even realising it!

This was the case for one of my clients.?

He was always full on, so stressed, trying to juggle and control everything - from his personal to his professional life - feeling he couldn’t fully trust everyone to do what they were supposed to do in the best possible way.??

I challenged him to explore where this need was coming from and the first question I asked was,?

“How much do you trust yourself, your skills and the impact you have on those around you?"?

Followed by,?

“What if you could fully trust yourself, before fully trusting others, too?”?

He’s someone who’s clearly passionate about what he does and the results he wants to achieve. He’s talented and skilled.?

He’s also very hard on himself and his performance, and I could see how that represented an obstacle to his levels of self-trust.?

So I asked him to walk through the Stephen Covey’s Trust Model:

Rather than using the model to measure and improve trust towards others though, I asked him to use it to check how much he trusted himself.?

He quickly observed that on the Competency side he was ticking all the boxes; he was capable, had a proven track record of his success, he had the skills and knowledge and felt confident about it.?

Once he looked at the Character side however, he realised that while Integrity, Intent, Honesty and Fairness all scored high, Caring and Transparency weren’t.?

So we dived a bit deeper in.?

When it came to Transparency, he was quick to admit that he struggled to be open about any challenges or things that troubled him, which meant he couldn’t easily reach out for help or share the burden of responsibility with others.?

When it came to Caring, he had the biggest revelation yet: he was not taking enough care of himself and he was constantly putting everything and everyone before himself.?

He never openly stated his needs and struggled to find headspace to recharge and positively evaluate his own behaviour or performance. He wasn’t practising any self-compassion, which led to a nagging feeling of wanting to prove himself.?

This new understanding of what was holding him back gave him new inspiration to try something different and make a change in own approach.?

Quickly, he found more confidence and self-trust, which naturally translated into a better relationship with his team. The results was that his team now mirrored his levels of trust and felt empowered to take ownership of their work and productivity.?

The business results undeniably benefited from this change, too.?

So here’s a thought for you.?

As a leader, if you want to let go of control and feel a greater sense of trust within your companies, you first need to work on your own self-trust.?

It might sound counterintuitive, but the more you lead the way and build your trust in yourself, the more you will be able to build a culture of trust, self-directedness and ownership all around you - meaning the overall performance and results will skyrocket.??

If you take a look at Covey's model, what are the areas you could focus on to increase or build your self-trust??

What’s the biggest element that needs change??

How is lack of self trust holding you back from finding more freedom, peace of mind and bigger business results??

?I look forward to hearing from you