Do What You Dread Most, First

Do What You Dread Most, First

Do What You Dread Most, First

Or, "The Worst Advice I Ever Received"

There are many things I could be doing right now. Some might even say there are many things I should be doing right now. But the truth is, I don’t feel like doing them. Instead, I feel like telling a story.

So—if you will indulge me …

My experience as the founder and CEO of The Starr Conspiracy for the last 20 years or so has been anything but smooth. Today, I enjoy immense success by any measure (quantitative or qualitative) and my work is extremely fulfilling; but it hasn’t always been that way.

Reflecting upon my life with The Starr Conspiracy (so far), I would say that I have played a small but significant role in a spectacular drama—one that (again, so far) has unfolded in three acts.?

In the first act, I am a naive and insecure kid who allows my head to be filled with ideas about how “business is supposed to work.” In the second act, I am a frustrated (angry, even) “entrepreneur” with a goal to change the way business is supposed to work. And in the third act, I am a humbled but optimistic leader with a happy family and successful company.

But for now, let’s focus on the first act. The one where I am a naive kid who allows my head to be filled with silly ideas.?

I started my company accidentally—and with a lot of help from my friends. Long story short, a consulting client gave me money to start an agency (near the turn of the century) wanting nothing more than to be a client of said agency. How about that?!? As many times as I tell that story, I still can’t believe it.?

So I took the money and started an agency. But running an agency was very different from being a consultant. I thought it would be as easy for me as everything I had done before. But it wasn’t. It wasn’t easy at all. And I failed over and over again.

In the early days of my failure, I would take any advice I could get. And even today, I am grateful for that advice (whether I judge it in retrospect to be good or bad). But the worst advice I ever received was from a puffed-up-bully-of-a-man with a lot of grit and determination, but very little compassion or generosity. But hey—when you’re struggling to figure things out, it’s easy to follow the wrong people and to take bad advice. Even from The Bully.

Among many terrible lessons The Bully tried to teach me, the worst was, “do what you dread most, first.” He even had it wood-burned on a plaque in his office (though he didn’t include the grammatically-correct comma). Do what you dread most first. [Feel free to now eviscerate my own grammar.]

Seems like really good advice, right? Especially for procrastinators, right? Want to succeed? Do what you dread most first! [Sic.]

And so I did.?

I worked really hard to create “dread lists” of all the things I dreaded most. I tried to attack those lists first thing in the morning (that time of day when all the self-help gurus say you should try to do dreadful things). And you know what? I got a lot of things that I dreaded done. A lot of dreadful things.

Unfortunately, I crushed my soul in the process. And given that my superpower is audacious creativity! (says me)—the soul crushing part wasn’t great for business.?

It turns out that when you always do the things you dread most, first—you find yourself mostly doing things you dread! And that really sucks. Like become-an-alcoholic-and-pack-on-an-extra-100-lbs sucks. There is no shortage of dreadful things in life (if that’s all you’re looking for).?

A few years ago, I made a big change in my life. I made a conscious decision to do the things that bring me the most joy, first. OMG. What a difference a few years makes.?

When you do the things that bring you the most joy, first … a few special things happen. First, you end up spending most of your time doing things that bring?you joy instead of dread! Second, the things you dread tend to fall away (either because they weren’t important to begin with or you find it easier to dedicate time to some important things you dread [like taxes] because it’s not your everyday death march). Finally, you serve as an inspiration to yourself and others.

I am so grateful that I was able to make this transformation prior to the pandemic. Because (as the founder and CEO of a mid-sized business) if I had spent every day during the pandemic doing what I dread, first … I would have run myself and the company into the ground. So many things to dread. So many.

So here’s my advice to you. [I’m getting to the age where I feel safe offering advice whether you want it or not, whether you use it or not.] Do what brings you the most joy, first. And if you find yourself doing only stuff you dread day after day after day … check out The Starr Conspiracy! We’re hiring. And we do joy first.?

But seriously. Stop sewing the boot to kick your own ass. If you have to screw up your courage every day to get through each day … you’re probably doing it wrong. This is supposed to be fun, right? Life, that is. It’s supposed to be fun.

So turn your personal “dread list” or worry list or task list into a Joy List! Do what brings you the most joy, first. And if you find yourself getting fired or changing careers or whatever because you couldn’t find anything to do that brings you joy?

You’re welcome.

Bentzy Goldman

Bringing AI to Safari Travel

3 年

What a conspiracy!??

回复
Sean M. Wood

Owner at Three 8 Communications

3 年

Thanks for this, Bret. I've never been one to do what I dread first. But I have learned to embrace hard conversations and I've tried really hard to get my kids to do that. We've become such a society of texters and emailers that we're afraid to talk to people. Even when we've made a mistake and need to own up to it. But usually, the conversation you don't want to have (or maybe even dread) is a lot easier than you expected. Hell yeah. Don't focus on the dreadful, but don't run from the fearful. Have those uncomfortable conversations. You end up stronger for it.

回复
Rachit Malhotra

Client Strategy Director | Helping HR & HCM Tech Companies Reach Their Audience | Multi-lingual Puns & Stories (now in 3 languages!)

3 年

It's freeing to do things that way. It's also kind of hard to find places where you are actively encouraged to think/feel/act that way.

回复
Kat Stupka

Marketing + Brand Strategist | Storyteller | Champion of People & Experiences | Strategic Account Manager @ Direct Marketing Solutions

3 年

"Turn your personal "dread list" or?worry list?or?task list?into a Joy List! Do what brings you the most joy, first. And if you find yourself getting fired or changing careers or whatever because you couldn't find anything to do that brings you joy? You're welcome." -- THANK YOU, from someone who took this advice before you put it out into the Linkedinesphere... is that a thing? When I got laid off from doing what I dreaded because of the pandemic and sat down to make a list of the things that I envisioned in my "ideal work environment," I thought it would be a pipe dream until I got hired on here. I'm eternally grateful that you're doing what you love, FIRST, so that an entire pirate ship of weirdos gets to do the same - and that I haven't been told to walk the plank (yet).

Adam Zuckerman, PhD

Helping companies improve performance by enhancing the employee experience.

3 年

Provocative as usual, Bret. (How long did it take you to put on all that make-up?)

要查看或添加评论,请登录

Bret Starr的更多文章

  • 31 Work Tech Companies Gettin' That AI Money in 2024

    31 Work Tech Companies Gettin' That AI Money in 2024

    We've Seen This Before When it comes to Work Tech, there was a world before SaaS and a very different world after. Some…

    7 条评论
  • Politeness Boosts AI Performance by Up to 15%

    Politeness Boosts AI Performance by Up to 15%

    Be Nice or Pay the Price My daughter heard me being rude to ChatGPT the other day and she said something like, "You'd…

    7 条评论
  • Update on tsc.Zora (Our Agentic Marketing Platform)

    Update on tsc.Zora (Our Agentic Marketing Platform)

    This is a long one! So I'll provide a quick summary at the top. TL;DR Zora is an agentic marketing platform that…

    5 条评论
  • How to SEO for AI

    How to SEO for AI

    As the Chief AI Officer for a marketing agency (TSC), my head is always in the clouds. For example, right now I'm…

    16 条评论
  • TSC: Previously The Starr Conspiracy

    TSC: Previously The Starr Conspiracy

    About a year ago, I wrote a book called A Humble Guide To Fixing Everything In Brand, Marketing And Sales. It was…

    31 条评论
  • Let's Talk about SDRs

    Let's Talk about SDRs

    Outbound Appointment Setting Doesn’t Work Anymore I could load this article with statistics about the declining…

    19 条评论
  • Brand, Marketing & Sales for Tech Companies Has Changed

    Brand, Marketing & Sales for Tech Companies Has Changed

    Brand, Marketing and Sales for Tech Companies Has Changed I feel compelled to deliver an important message to tech…

    3 条评论
  • Conversation Starter: SaaS Ruined Marketing & Sales

    Conversation Starter: SaaS Ruined Marketing & Sales

    How's that for a controversial topic? As you read this newsletter, I hope you decide it's worth subscribing to! Most of…

    4 条评论
  • Chapter Four

    Chapter Four

    Chapter four of my new book—A Humble Guide To Fixing Everything In Brand, Marketing, And Sales. Available on Amazon…

    4 条评论
  • Chaos Theory, Customer Experience and The Cover Art for My New Book

    Chaos Theory, Customer Experience and The Cover Art for My New Book

    My new book, A Humble Guide To Fixing Everything In Brand, Marketing, And Sales, is set to drop on September 26. I've…

社区洞察

其他会员也浏览了