DO WEAKNESSES FALL IN YOUR BLINDSPOT?

As humans, most of us are acutely aware of our weaknesses and generally know how to deal with them. For example, the most common ones you will hear are #timemanagement, #detailoriented, #selfcriticims and #insecurity.

But what about those that fall into your #blindspot? What do they look like? It's a type of #weakness that you don't know exists inside of you but others can see that it exists in you. They fall into two categories which are:

? Fear of Rejection- When you fear rejection, your weaknesses will include things like perfectionism, over-pleasing others and lack of emotional regulation.

? Fear of Failure- This will include weaknesses such as detail orientation, over-preparing, and self-criticism.

The fears bury themselves deep in our mind and move out from our consciousness. But our actions result in SELF-SABOTAGING behaviors because of those fears resulting in the "said" weaknesses. For example, let's take a person who is trying to do things perfectly all the time. For someone that is looking from the outside will see that the perfectionist behavior makes them do more sloppy work because they are over-thinking every step of the way. Perfectionists will try to do everything the right way taking longer to complete tasks and that in turn leads to heightened stress levels.

So, how do you deal with a WEAKNESS THAT FELL INTO YOUR BLINDSPOT?

? The most important thing is to become self-aware: As humans, there is a tendency to avoid facing our weaknesses especially when they are rooted in fears. Becoming self-aware means first and foremost recognizing your weakness and seeing the impact they have had on your life.

? Next, self-reflect: Self-reflection is the next step after bringing something into your awareness. This part requires you to take a piece of paper, find quiet time and then ask yourself these questions which is like a game of Why's. Here is an example:

1. What is my weakness? Perfectionism
2. Why is it my weakness? Because I want to be perfect.
3. Why do I want to be perfect? Because I want to make sure I don't do anything wrong.
4. Why shouldn't I do anything wrong? Because I will be thought of as a failure.
5. Why will I be thought of as a failure? Because I fear failure.
6. Why do I fear failure? Because of this incident in my life....

When you self-reflect, it will always show you your deepest darkest fears that somehow your weaknesses have masked for you. So, how do you tackle such strong fears in your life? It requires you to understand a few very important concepts:

? Your fears have gotten rooted in you because of something that happened to you. Those fears resulted in behaviors that were initially started as being "protective" in nature but soon turned into "self-sabotaging" behaviors.

? Understand that you are a product of your learning experiences. If your experience was negative, you have learned a negative response; If it was positive, then your learned a behavior that is positive.

? These weaknesses are a part of you and you can make them your strengths. How does one do that? I am sure you have heard this a thousand and one times over but how is it actually done?? So, here are few tips:

1. Don't live in denial that your weakness is rooted in a fear. Accept that your weakness came due to a situation or circumstance in your life.
2. Deal with the emotions attached to that specific circumstance. If you deal with your emotions head-on; you take away the power of fear.
3. Reach out for help. If you realized that your fear is more deep-rooted than you think, then reach out to a mental health professional to help you navigate those emotions and feelings.
4. Accept the uniqueness of your weakness. Not everyone has a weakness that is let's say detail orientation. Utilize it to your advantage by taking jobs that require those analytical skills.
5. When you reach a state of happiness with accepting all of yourself....reach out to others who might be struggling in a similar way.