Do Men Paying for their Female Dates' Dinners Relates to the Gender Pay Gap?
Do you think that the Gender Pay Gap (12.7% on average in the EU) and the Gender Dating Pay Gap are related? Forbes' writer Kim Elsesser , who covers "the intersection of business, psychology and gender" thinks so and so do I, based on both social observations in general as well as personal experiences.
"78% of respondents said they think men should pay for the first date. And, perhaps surprisingly, men (85%) were even more likely than women (72%) to think that men should foot the bill. Even after the first date, men tend to pick up the majority of expenses and report feeling guilty taking money from women."
Given how expensive many of the dating venues are (if you are a man trying to impress a woman on a date you are not likely to take her to McDonald's...), this huge gap is quite meaningful financially.
Kim sees these dating pay norms as part of 'benevolent sexism', which she connects to "serious repercussions for women", contributing to lower career aspirations, lower self-efficacy and, even, lower performance on some tasks (this last aspect reminded me of stereotype threat effects).
From my experience, often, women who were financially well-off, including with earnings comparable or even higher than mine, including women who considered themselves feminists, still had a strong expectation that I would pay for the meal/drinks and would take offense if I suggested we split the bill (incidentally, I found differences related to age/generation in this regard).
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My observations seem to be supported by research; according to the article: "Straight men who fail to pay for dates risk being viewed as cheap or uninterested.??One study found that women viewed men’s chivalry, like paying for dates, as a sign that the man was respectful and caring. Even feminist men have good reason to refrain from bucking the norm and asking a woman to pay."
What's your view? Is it time to change those outdated norms in order to support healthy social and economic changes and de-couple romance form money?
Senior Manager
1 年Some customs and traditions take generations to eliminate.
Senior Manager
1 年Doesn't relate, just a custom left over from men being taught by their mothers and fathers to always offer to pay. Regardless if it is a Man woman or group, good manners dictate it is the polite thing to do!!!