Do I Even Belong Here?

"Oh my?-?do I even belong here?"?was one of the first thoughts that ran through my head as we settled into the initial session on day one of the Modern Elder Academy. I was in the room with many accomplished, credentialed, polished, and undoubtedly privileged people.

MEA promised in the marketing to offer a platform for self-reflection, triggering revelations and -?theoretically,?as a result -?transformations.

With a focus on Experiential Learning -?learning by doing -?and stretching outside one's comfort zone, the program is solidly grounded in one of the best ways to facilitate adult learning.

Experiential Learning has ancient roots but has gained popularity and formal recognition at different times and contexts. The basic principle that people learn through experience can be traced back to age-old philosophies, including those of Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle.?In the context of our MEA curriculum, we were invited to explore our emotional landscapes utilizing Experiential Learning.

My self-doubts evaporated as quickly as morning dew in direct sunlight when the group started addressing their emotional challenges. (That and the conversations over breakfast, lunch, and dinner focused on sharing ideas and books?- books people were reading, and books?some were writing). The Intelligentsia are my soulmates. My breath settled, and the seven-day experience was full of joy and wonder.

The stark differences between the public presentations of our high-functioning public personas and the interior view people hold of themselves never cease to amaze and amuse me.

The common denominator in the many people I've met throughout my life is the "grab-bag" of doubt, fears, shame, and guilt we carry around with us, tucked in a left hip pocket.

"Every damn body got a pocket of crazy in all hues, shades, and tones!"

Echos of these family/generational issues, childhood traumas, and cultural programming inhibit our enjoyment of life. The only remaining question for me becomes: Why do we consistently choose pain and suffering over the joy and connection available to us every day?

Knowing that it's all a matter of choice is our first step into Rekindle:?Living Without Fear, Loving Without Limits.

According to the Buddha, desire and ignorance lie at the root of suffering. These both lead to craving and attachment to impermanent things, and this attachment causes us to suffer when we experience loss or change because we hold onto a false belief that these things will bring us lasting happiness.

The greatest gift of aging is understanding how impermanent and fleeting the moment is. We Elders have the luxury of looking back on previous decades and realizing that we are here to savor our moments; the perfect, joyous moments and the challenging, gut-wrenching moments are all here for us to savor.

I want to encourage everyone to consider when a negative thought pattern comes up, saying out loud to oneself,?"Hmm, isn't that interesting?"

Take a deep breath, ask yourself if that thought will have any meaning ten years from now, and then let it go!?

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