Do / Don't Communicate Well...
My second and third year at University I lived in a small apartment with a childhood friend. As those of you who’ve attended college or university away from home and living on your own, these are very important times for learning the ways of the world and finding your place in it. While most of the stories from that time will stay safely in the vault, a poignant reminder of the power of communication faced me daily while living in that apartment.
“I do don’t want any stinking flyers please”
Then, like now, residents of the complex were inundated with flyers and pamphlets from local vendors pitching their products and services to the residents. The sheer volume of print material could be daunting, to the point where a trip home on the weekend or over reading week could result in a pile of papers pushed through your mail slot in the apartment door waiting for you on your return. For the two years we lived there, we had a teaching assistant (TA) living across the hall from us. Each time I came in or out of the apartment I saw the sign on their door hand written in big block letters directed to the folks dropping things in our mail slots. It read: “I do don’t want any stinking flyers please”.
So much to unpack there. The first time I read it, I thought it was a joke. Do they or don’t they want them? What does do don’t even mean? As time went on and as dozens of views of the sign piled up I got to thinking they were just not all there so to speak. Hard to tell since I had zero interaction with them aside from the occasional hello or head nod in the hall. This experience taught me a few things about the power of communication:
Be clear: while the double negative in the sentence was and remains good for a laugh, I wonder to this day if the sign had the desired effect? Did they get MORE flyers as people read it and thought they were being cheeky? Did people read it and think they actually wanted the flyers? I have to believe the intent of the sign was to discourage the flyer deliveries but even as I write this I am doubting myself.
Ask for Help: if you are not clear on how to articulate or communicate something, ask for help. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness but rather an opportunity to get your message correct and clear from the get-go. For my part, I thought many times about grabbing a Sharpie and striking out the “do” on the sign but to be honest I just couldn’t be bothered at that time. Two years of looking at it might seem like a long time but as a student I had other priorities. It’s the thought that counts I guess.
Take the Feedback: I have to believe they still received a ton of flyers with the ambiguity on that sign. Looking back it makes me wonder if they thought people were ignoring their request or just delivering more in spite. Either way they could have taken the feedback (ie still getting flyers) and adjusted their approach accordingly. Think about your own written communications. Are your thoughts and asks of others clear or do they reek of ambiguity?
While the double negative on the apartment door sign may have been an extreme case, if you think about all the written correspondence we put out daily there are certainly times we can be clearer in our intent and messaging.
If you want to read more of these types of stories and ‘reflections’, I do don’t think you should click on the link below.
Until next time, keep the faith…
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Jim McKay is a seasoned supply chain executive with over twenty-five years experience in leading and coaching others. From the shop floor to the board room to the ball diamond and hockey rink, those who know him know that he has a few stories to share about life and leadership. Through his 'Reflections' posts and 'Reflections of a Workaholic' publications Jim shares his experience in transportation, supply chain and leadership through impactful and insightful stories that are meant to help and inspire others.
The commentary and opinions in these stories are his own...