Divorcing Together: How to Maintain the Peace

Just because you are getting a divorce doesn’t mean you have to do so in opposition to each other. Divorcing together, rather than against each other, can help you maintain the peace in your family during an emotionally trying time. Maintaining the peace in your family during divorce proceedings is an important step, especially if you have children. When people let animosity flourish during a divorce, they risk losing sight of what is truly important to them. Because of this, maintaining the peace is key to an outcome you are happy with. So, how can you foster peace and friendliness during the tumult of divorce? It isn’t easy, but here are a few tips to help you.

First, put your relationship differences aside so you can focus on the matters at hand. You have other differences to work out like who gets your child on holidays and who get the family home. Focus on what is important in the here and now.

Second, always keep your child’s best interests in mind. Knowing how much conflict can affect a child during a divorce can help you and your spouse keep the peace even when you are tempted to stand your ground on a high-conflict issue. The Massachusetts Probate and Family Court will be ensuring the agreements between you and your spouse will benefit your child.

Third, learn to let go. You both can’t have your way on all issues. Learn to prioritize peace of mind over material gains or moral wins during the divorce. That peace of mind is valuable and, more importantly, lasting.

Fourth, keep it strictly business. A divorce settlement is much like a business negotiation. Go into this process with the goal of maximizing your advantages while still reaching an agreement. You want the settlement to be favorable to you, but don’t let this result in unnecessary delays over petty details.

And lastly, work together rather than against each other. Even if the decision to divorce was mutual, legally separating your lives can bring out tension and conflict you thought you had under control. Divorce can put you on the offensive. You are already losing enough in the marriage, and you may want to fight hard to make sure you don’t lose anything else that is important to you. It should come as no surprise that fighting tooth and nail during divorce proceedings often does more harm than good. Divorcing together can help you and your spouse maintain the peace in your family. Utilizing this skill can mean the difference between a traumatic divorce and one that is peaceable and amicable.

Speak with an experienced Massachusetts divorce mediator if you want to discuss how you can maintain the peace in your divorce for the benefit of you and your children. Divorce mediation can provide the opportunity to work together on a mutually beneficial separation agreement. Although your divorce is just one stage in your life, the effects of it can be long lasting.

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