If Diversity is getting invited to the Dance Party, Inclusion is being asked to dance when you’re at the Party!

Diversity is beautiful! Stimulating! Enriching! And it′s challenging...

Diversity offers so many advantages. We know it by now. However, and depending on who you ask, diversity could encompass one of the following three main dimensions: Demographic diversity (gender, race, sexual orientation, etc.), cognitive diversity (how we think, resolve problems, and master challenges), and experiential diversity (our abilities, passion, affinities, etc.). All three dimensions form and define who we are: our identity! Or speaking with Brecht, they determine our identities, since we all consist of multiple and interrelated parts and personality aspects. And not just of one identity. Therefore, we carry a high degree of diverse diversity in ourselves. Every single one of us. Hurray!

Especially in the past years awareness on the importance of diversity has significantly grown. We′ve also started to realize and acknowledge the many challenges organizations and society face not only when it comes to diversity but also inclusion. Inclusion, which refers to a cultural and environmental feeling of belonging, is linked with the extent to which people feel appreciated, valued, accepted, and respected for their true and authentic selves. As a result, individuals are comfortable in opening up, sharing their thoughts, and being willing to argue for their ideas and beliefs.  

A time when I felt excluded and how it made me feel

It happened when I was fourteen years old. We moved from a small, rural village where I had grown up within a tight network of family and friends to a big city. My school changed. So did my life. My old and new school were literally like day and night. The new one was larger, more modern, and more anonymous. The biggest difference, however, were character and behavior of my new classmates. They were more interested in looks, appearance, and expensive brands than in real friendship. At least that′s how I perceived it. For almost half a year I was an outsider, excluded from most of their conversations and activities. I felt not wanted, hurt, and angry. At the same time, I did not want to go down the route of having to wear expensive sneakers, shirts, etc. to get accepted. I chose a different option and instead I focused on my studies and sports. In the end, and although it was a painful journey, these two elements – as I was pretty good at both – helped me to gain their respect and acceptance. I′m proud that I mastered it in such a way. 

An instance when I – intentionally or unintentionally – excluded someone else

Yes, I was - and I am - responsible for having intentionally excluded someone. I′m ashamed of it, although it was many years ago. When I was a first grader, I had three very good friends. We would spend most of the time together at school and after school. One day we decided to form a gang. We called ourselves The Invincibles. Anyone who wanted to join us had to pass several tests of courage (like eating a bug, swimming in a cool creek, etc.). The four of us decided who could become a new gang member and who not. It made us feel powerful, special, and cool. In hindsight I laugh about it and consider our behavior back then mostly as boyish swaggering and pranks. Still, I′m also very glad that this period lasted only for a few weeks as we quickly lost interest; we enjoyed playing with everyone too much. 

Call to Action: “If diversity is getting invited to the dance party, inclusion is being asked to dance when you’re at the party.” (Verna Myers)

Verna Myers′ call to action is both inspirational and much needed. I often observe – both in professional and personal settings – that addressing diversity without inclusion does not work. Yet, many of us still struggle to embrace and accept diversity in whatever form. Based on my experience, inclusion is the harder aspect, as diversity is easier to see or measure. Inclusion, or lack of, can take many forms, and not be obvious. More than ever, striving for diversity and in parallel being inclusive needs to be our personal and professional top priority and focus area. We’ve all got a part to play in being inclusive, not just diverse, and it takes a conscious effort to get there.

What is your experience with diversity and inclusion? Have you ever felt excluded? How can we better appreciate diversity and help others being and feeling included? Please leave a comment below and join the discussion!

Thanks,

Andreas von der Heydt

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Andreas von der Heydt is Director of Talent Acquisition & Recruiting at Amazon. Before he held various senior management positions at Amazon and L'Oréal. He's a leadership expert and management coach. Andreas worked and lived in Europe, Australia, the U.S. and Asia. Currently he lives with his wife and daughters in Seattle, USA. Andreas enjoys blogging as a private person here on LinkedIn about various exciting topics. His latest book is about what makes a future leader. All statements made, opinions expressed, etc. in his articles only reflect his personal opinion.

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Other recent and popular articles by Andreas:

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