Ditch Resolutions...Live Your Mission

For those of us not born yesterday, we've accumulated quite a few New Years and with them a whole bunch of Resolutions. Yet, with every "Auld Lang Syne" comes the next 365 days of expectations...either the ones imposed upon us by others (our bosses, our significant others, our [fill in the blank]) and/or the ones we demand of ourselves.

By January 10 or 5 or 2, more often than not, we may be feeling as if we're already behind and have AGAIN dropped the ball on our plans (and not in the fun New Year's Eve Times Square countdown kind of way).

I know I'm not alone. If you're human, you've experienced the thrill of possibilities that a new year brings along with the deflated disappointment that happens when we fall short of meeting expectations.

As one of my favorite authors

Anne Lamott says, “Expectations are resentments waiting to happen.”

Messing up or missing out or muddying the waters is a given in this thing we call life. Losing focus, feeling overwhelmed, lacking clarity...it all happens, and, too often, it leads to abandoning the very things we say we want. We may very well really want them, it isn't that we don't, but I think it's that "black and white" mentality associated with our "to dos" that gets us stuck and has the power to derail us from our dreams.

If we're not perfect, we discount our progress. If it doesn't go according to our plan, we assume it isn't going to go. For example: If our New Year's Resolution is to cut out all sugar and lose 10 pounds in one month, and we miss the mark because of that one day we poured a teaspoon of the white stuff into our morning coffee, or because at the end of January, when stepping on the scale, it shocks us by showing a loss of "only" 9-1/2 pounds...yup, you know what's coming. We give up and chalk it up to failure.

Who can relate?

One way I've found to free ourselves from the abandonment of resolutions is to not make any in the first place. Yes! To get UNSTUCK from what isn't really helpful in moving us forward, IMHO, we need to DITCH those New Year's Resolutions. If you haven't already tried it, you're in for a treat. It feels so LIBERATING and, surprise, it may actually help you get to where you want to be with a perspective that is so much more motivating and that comes with a lot less effort and self-loathing (especially when your journey isn't as much of a straight shot as you'd like).

This year, why not replace your "all or nothing" list of what you're going to do -- those "Resolutions" -- with more clarity about who you are and how you'll step into all you are meant to be?

What if this year, you work on crafting and aligning with your own individual MISSION STATEMENT??

You, most likely, already know what one is. Most, if not all, companies have them. Here are just a few: Google's is “To organize the world's information and make it universally accessible and useful.” Starbuck's is “To inspire and nurture the human spirit – one person, one cup and one neighborhood at a time.” The Peace Corps is “To promote world peace and friendship by fulfilling three goals: To help the people of interested countries in meeting their need for trained men and women. To help promote a better understanding of Americans on the part of the peoples served.”

Every mission statement communicates one's purpose. It's the story of you and what you aspire to. Having a mission statement helps organizations decide what to do, what to offer, what to say yes to and say no to. It doesn't give a hard and fast list of "to-dos" for the coming year that may or may not align with one's core values; rather, it gives focus and, as world-renowned coach and bestselling author Martha Beck calls it "a North Star" to follow for this year and the next and the next...

There is no "one" road to get to the destination; rather, there's a light that illuminates the direction in which to go.

So how about it? Why not create a missions statement for yourself?

A mission statement is a one- to about three-sentence summary of your core values and your aim or intention behind your actions. My friend and content-creating master Joe Pulizzi just wrote a post on how to write a mission statement. When you have something like this (and know that it may take some time to do it and won't be perfect right out of the gate...so let yourself off that hook right now), everything that comes your way can be measured against it. If the opportunity aligns with your mission statement, then it's the right next step for you. If it doesn't ladder up to your mission statement, then it isn't worthy of you or your energy. Your mission statement gives you the POWER TO CHOOSE without the overwhelm, guilt, or any of the strings attached. And unlike New Year's Resolutions, it does so with a focus on the direction of your journey versus the final destination that may feel so far out of reach.

Anyone can craft their own mission statement. Here's mine:

I am a storyteller who strives to make a difference in this world by crafting and sharing stories that matter. Everything I do ladders up to the belief in and the celebration of the triumph of the human spirit and the power that lies within each of us to bring about change for the better. I strive to engage with people by leveraging the gifts I’ve been given – creativity, humor, and insight – to see what others might not and to inspire in others what might be.

Pretty lofty, if I do say so myself. And that's part of the point and the fun. This "fits" me...who I am and what I aspire to be. It speaks to my skills, to what makes me tick, and to how I use my "super powers" in this world. It's not "write a best-seller in a weekend"; rather, it's "engage in a daily practice, even if it's five-minutes, jotting down or recording the memories that made me" -- the "how" isn't important so much as the "why" is. As long as I'm laddering up to my mission, and not imposing such stringent outcomes that often derail and cause one to give up on their dreams, I'm on track. And that is much more empowering than a bunch of resolutions just waiting to be broken.

So what do you think? Will you give it a go? Will you ditch your resolutions this year in favor of crafting your mission statement? If you already have one, are you making choices in support of it? If you don't already have one, maybe it's time you do. And I'd be happy to help you write a mission statement worthy of you.

This year, get farther by ditching those resolutions. Make 2023 the year you more effortlessly start journeying on your own path, playing by your own rules, and stepping into your life's purpose.?

Happy New Year ~ Journey On!?

#storytelling #inspiration #missionsthatmatter #newyearresolutions #progressoverperfection #lifecoaching #writingprompt #howtowriteabook

NOT BORN YESTERDAY is a work in progress, and just as we who were not born yesterday continue to evolve and grow in our respective journeys, so, too, will this newsletter. I welcome hearing from you on what topics you might want me to touch on here and open up for discussion. You and your story matter. You have and continue to live your own "wonderful life" and sharing the lessons you've learned with others can only help to change this world for the better.

If you'd like to learn more about turning your life stories and the lessons you've learned into a book, click here and join my next six-week workshop, "What's The Book in You?" starting January 12.

If you'd like to see more of my posts and articles,?follow me on LinkedIn?and subscribe to this newsletter.

Paolina Milana is a storyteller with journalistic roots. She is Founder of?Madness To Magic. She is a published award-winning author, her most recent book Seriously! Are We THERE Yet?! speaks to the shoulda, woulda, couldas we grownups deal with, a podcaster of?“I’m with Crazy: A Love Story”, a speaker, and a content producer; her work has been published in various outlets including?INC,?LifeHack, and more. Paolina is an authority in story-based leadership and in sharing stories that celebrate the triumph of the human spirit and the power that lies within each of us to bring about change for the better.