Ditch Resolutions. Make Revelations.

Let’s get real for a moment: In a world obsessed with New Year’s resolutions and “new year, new me” nonsense, most are doomed. Even if 10% of people achieve their goals, 90% of us are left feeling disappointed, guilty and stuck with unused kettlebells.

The underlying message has long been “Change everything about yourself to find happiness.” But what if the key to growth isn’t a radical overhaul but a shift in perspective?

Freshness of Appreciation

Scott Barry Kaufman, psychologist at Barnard College, Columbia University, coined “Continued Freshness of Appreciation” as a crucial aspect of self-actualisation.

It’s the notion of, “I can appreciate again and again, freshly and naively, the basic goods of life, with awe, pleasure, wonder, and even ecstasy, however stale these experiences may have become to others.” It’s the question, “How can I cultivate the seemingly mundane without torturing myself into perceived fulfilment?”

No fibs, no fads. Just honesty.

This isn’t an attempt to drag you into a pyramid scheme or a lose-weight-while-eating-carbs programme. It’s about gratitude for and curiosity about everything around you.

Keep in mind, while it may sound airy-fairy, that reaching your potential and living with purpose, creativity and joy doesn’t mean stagnation. But we do recommend finding happiness in the present moment, without superhero pressure on yourself to change.?

A traveller in your own city?

Often, seeing the same neighbours, trees, buildings, and colleagues for years can yield feelings of being trapped, bored, idle, or even claustrophobic.?

Here’s how to rediscover the magic of daily life:?

  1. Slow down and pay attention: Stop rushing through your day and notice what’s happening now. Appreciate things you usually take for granted, like the smell of coffee, the taste of melted cheese on fresh bread, the sound of a beloved laugh.
  2. Be curious and playful: Spoiler alert: You don’t know everything, there is no life rulebook, and you can die tomorrow. Explore the world with an open mind, ask questions, try new things, experiment, and talk to your pets. Aloud.
  3. Rule with appreciation: Problems, complaints and regrets won’t make the chocolate digest faster. Say thank you, give compliments, offer help, make someone smile, and be grateful for the things you usually over-look and under-value.

Freshness of appreciation is not a one-time thing but a workable habit. Forget about making and breaking unrealistic pledges in early January. Rediscover the magic already in your life and find happiness in the present - without changing anything.

Resolutions? Drivel. Appreciation? Realistic.

Kim Vermaak

The Mindset Whisperer | Helping Coaches, Executives & Speakers Conquer the Fear of Writing to Build Their Legacy | Book Coach | Author | Speaker on Storytelling & Leadership Engagement

11 个月

I can't quite remember when I made a New Year's resolution. I just have projects and when I consistently work on those projects, my life gets better.

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