Discussion, Dialogue, Debate: Getting on the Same Page

Ever been in a conversation where things just… didn’t click? Where you left frustrated or feeling misunderstood?

It might be because you and the other person were unintentionally speaking past each other. Here’s why:

? A discussion is about exchanging ideas and solving problems.

? A dialogue is about exploring perspectives and understanding

? A debate is about persuading and proving a point.

Each is valid in its own right, but misalignment happens when you think you’re in one mode, and the other person thinks you’re in another. You’re ready to explore (dialogue), but they’re pushing to solve (discussion). Or you’re aiming for understanding, and they’re out to win (debate).

Misalignment isn’t just frustrating—it’s the reason so many conversations break down.

Here’s a simple fix: before diving into the what, align on the how. Are we here to exchange ideas, understand each other, or advocate for a position?

It’s a small step that can make a big difference—at work, at home, and everywhere in between.

Have you run into this before? What’s worked for you to stay aligned? Let’s discuss (or dialogue ??).