Discourse on Complaining

“Never complain and never explain.” – Benjamin Disraeli

Seeker:  Kindly elaborate on the above quote

Maladkar: Explanation of something is giving power to others. Elbert Hubbard said, “Never explain - your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway.” So why spent your energy and efforts on something you need not do in the first place.   After taking a wise inclusive decision, there is no point in explaining the decision to others, as others especially the affected parties will not comprehend your stance. Complaining is no use, as action speaks more than words. So complaining does not give any solutions. Complaining is compounding the problem more. Complaining is waste of energy. And so are explanations. Explanations may make no sense to affected parties. So take a decision after hearing all sides and then act on it without complaining and explaining. Instead use the knack of listening to people. A beautiful hikayat (parable) by Shaikh Saadi in his Persian book, Gulistaan exemplifies the benefits of listening to others. The parable highlights the importance of good advice and how it can dramatically change a person’s life. A traveler was feeling very hungry. He had just Rs.2 in his sack. He also had a donkey with him. He thought that if he bought food for himself, he won’t be able to buy grass for his donkey and if he bought grass for his donkey, he would not be able to buy any food for himself. Should he ask someone as to what to do ? He asked a group of children playing nearby. One of the kids advised the man to buy a water melon for Rs.2. Have its pulp and give its green exterior to the donkey. Two rupees would be sufficient to satiate the hunger for both.

Thus the parable shows us how a sane advice can come from any quarter and one should be open to accepting it from anyone. Though there are scores of unsolicited advisers, ever ready with their unused ‘wisdom’, there are a few whose advice can change one’s life. So listening to others and taking opinion of others is important, but then take your own decision. Then after taking the decision don’t go on explaining for you have based that decision after having opinion of many. Israelmore Ayivor so rightly said, “Your success lies in your own hands. You must therefore not wait for the grass to become greener by magic. You have the hands to irrigate your own territory by doing what is expected of you.” So do what it takes and move forward. Moving forward is life, just complaining and explaining is stagnation and stagnation is nothing short of death. Just like the bacteriostatic drug that becomes bactericidal drug by its action of continuously inhibiting growth of microorganisms. So does stagnation becomes antithesis to life. Be a person of action instead.