A Discipline of Seeing, Part 2

Observation: Failing to plan is planning to fail.

In July 2020, I made the decision to leave the Navy. Since then, I’ve had dozens of discussions, coaching and mentoring sessions, informational interviews, exploratory chats, and many conversations that can only be described as a sort of therapy. The agents of this guided discovery are as diverse as the choices before me. Their only congruence is their willingness to help.

Throughout these sessions, I’ve learned some fundamental truths about transitioning from the Military. Everyone has an opinion, an experience, and a perspective worth learning from. Few of these plentiful opinions, experiences, and perspectives have much overlap. Insofar as they do share a motif, it’s that you absolutely positively indisputably MUST have a plan. A transition strategy of sorts. You cannot wing it. You can try, but it won’t be pretty. This life change is far too drastic to do it on a whim.

Intentional. Calculated. Purposeful. Focus. Those four words summarize every map I’ve been given. Sure, it’s reductionist, but it’s true. It’s the first principle approach to leaving the Military. Just preparing to leave requires a tremendous amount of work. I chose the word “requires” intentionally. You can’t just up and decide, “Hey now, I think I’ve had enough. Here’s my two weeks’ notice. Best of luck, fair winds, following seas, and all that stuff. Adieu.” That won’t work. Not only because the military requires 9-12 months’ notice, but also because you’d fall flat on your ass. Sure, you could recover, but why waste all that precious time? 

These are some hard-earned lessons from those who have gone before, distilled into the first principles of Intentional, Calculated, Purposeful, Focus:

1. Intentional: (C-Day -548) It takes 18-months to do this thing properly. You can do it in 12, but 18 is ideal. Make the decision, start the process as early as possible, and get action-oriented. Accept that you’ll need to make hard decisions, complex trade-offs, and sacrifices. At the end of the day, being intentional means making the decision even when you don’t want to. 
2. Calculated: (C-Day -548 to -365) The first 6 months are about self-discovery and planning. This can include transition programs -- there are many to choose from. Spend time learning about yourself, what makes you tick, your motivations, your career highlights, your strengths, your goals, your needs. Talk to as many people as possible. It’s not about job hunting, it’s about learning. Take every phone call, accept every informational interview, read every recommended book and article, and absorb information. Towards the end, develop a strategy that gets you from today to C-Day+1. And write everything down.
3. Purposeful: (C-Day -365 to -182) The middle 6 months are about taking your strategy and making it sing with self-focused actions. Self-focused -- That’s a challenging concept for a Naval Officer. As my friend Marc Baldwin told me, “You need to consciously overcome what will feel like selfishness.” Do you need certifications? Bring your prep books to work, take the time to study, and get those certs! Do you have a recruiter call in the middle of the day? Put it on your work calendar and take the call! Do you need to spend two nights a week doing transition programs? Block out the time and leave work a bit early those days. Some days I’m good at this. Some days I am decidedly not. On the days when I do it well, I’m better for everyone. I’m more relaxed, capable, and focused. On the days when I do it poorly, I’m stressed, anxious, and distracted. Staying self-focused during this time is better for everyone. This purposeful stage is where I am right now. I have pages of plans and strategies. I’ve written and rewritten my resume, my elevator pitch, stories from my life that demonstrate who I am and what I can do. I’ve practiced these things in the mirror, with my Wife, and with friends and colleagues. I’ve completed two transition programs, started a third, and I’ve received two professional certifications. I have a rolodex of mentors and coaches whenever I have questions or need advice. And I'm still really bad at being self-focused.
4. Focus: (C-Day -182 to +1) The final 6 months are about riding the wave of momentum. At this stage, all the work, planning, and decision-making should come to a head. Now is the time for action. Whatever decisions you’ve made about your future, pursue that future with a singular focus and intense dedication. Commit to the focus.

At the end of the day, leaving the Military is a learning process. We all recognize that no plan survives first contact with the enemy, but planning is still important. My own plans and strategies have changed a hundred times in the last 6 months. I’m still inventing as I go. Building the bridge while I cross it. But the roadmap is there and every time a piece falls off, I'm increasingly confident that I can put it back together better than before.

A close friend wrote to me this week, “While military careers are defined roads with set destinations like the interstate, the world into which I am stepping seems to me more like a roundabout in a developing country… The interstate is safe and assured, but effective and clear. The roundabout is rife with risk but overflowing with opportunity.” 

Even the roundabout requires a driver to have some idea of where she’s trying to go and how she might get there. She just needs to accept that despite her intentional, calculated, purposeful focus, she probably won’t arrive exactly as planned. But at the end of the day, she's going to arrive.