Discipline is Freedom

For the last couple of years, I have been a practitioner of Jiu-Jitsu. This last year my 5-year son has been able to join me and every week we do a Parent/Kid class where we get to learn Jiu-Jitsu together. As soon as David was big enough, wrestling has been one of his favorite things to do.  

In our class, we always learn a life lesson from the Professors and Coaches on subjects centered around Focus, Discipline, Energy, and Respect and how we apply those in everyday life. This to me is the most important part, not the strength or fighting techniques but the character building we both get from learning these principals in class. When David grows up, my desire is that he becomes a man of character, a man that honors and serves others, even when it may cost him something. I firmly believe this is a life of significance, purpose and freedom that is can only be accomplished through discipline.

In class, we learn that discipline is doing the things we need to do, even when we don't feel like doing them. 

There are so many aspects of life that require discipline. However, I find myself resisting it, preferring comfort and ease. One Saturday morning I woke up and was still exhausted, I just wanted to hit the snooze and go back to sleep. Our Jiu Jitsu class was in an hour and I had to wake up David to get him ready. My mind started to rationalize going back to sleep and that missing a class is not that big of a deal. And then I remembered discipline. 

Discipline is doing the things we need to do, even when we don't feel like doing them.

We went to class and I thought to myself, sometimes I don't always feel like being a Dad. I'm a single parent and the energy it takes to care for David with everything else going on in life, work, and commitments take a toll. It is easier to watch Netflix then pull out toys and play, or have David watch his tab than to interact with him as he asks a 100 "why" questions. I think all parents can understand this and I'm not saying that watching Netflix or allowing kids to have time on their tabs is bad.. Keeping a balance is the challenge and it requires discipline to make sure I am devoting effort and energy to developing my son's character and not letting it rot because I'm consumed with the busyness of the myriad of things that call for my attention.

I have learned that discipline is consistent action applied daily over a long period of time and that success in the small corners of life gives us the ability to handle the larger matters. Discipline is like a muscle, and just like in the gym if I go in there for the first time and start by trying to run 10 miles and lift 400 lbs, that more than likely, it will be so painful that I will not go back. Instead, my first time at the gym, I start off with a light workout and build upon that workout each time I go back is key to sustainability. 

I love the movie "What about Bob" in that movie, Bill Murray is compulsive and neurotic phobic that has a hard time doing anything because he has a fear of everything. One day he goes into a Psychotherapist to get help and the doctor prescription is to take baby steps, little steps towards whatever he is trying to accomplish, not to think of the end goal but the baby step in front of him that will get him closer to the goal. Baby steps to the door, baby steps out of the door, baby steps to the elevator, etc. The next thing he knows is that he is back home where he intended to be. The "baby steps" principal is key to his transformation after awhile Bob is experiencing freedom and goes on an adventure, taking up traveling, sailing, and doing things that he never thought he could do. Bob experiences freedom! 

When implementing discipline, we must always look to ourselves, recognizing that change starts from within, from our inner being. This is the starting place, we will have a hard time having discipline in other areas if we do not start with ourselves first. 

Everyone thinks of changing humanity and nobody thinks of changing himself. -Leo Tolstoy

Discipline in body = freedom of health and vitality

Discipline in mind = freedom of clarity and focus

Discipline in Spirit = freedom to experience Joy despite the circumstances of life

I have found when these things are in alignment within me, when my discipline muscle is strong, then being a good father comes with ease and being a leader in which the sacrifice and service comes at a cost, I find it effortless to do the right thing, even when I don't feel like doing it. Instead of running away from discipline but instead cultivating it consistently every day has given me a level of freedom, purpose, and joy in life. 

The key to discipline is that the purpose of discipline is freedom. Our aim is on freedom, not the discipline, focusing on the discipline itself apart from freedom will restrict and dull life.

Aim for freedom and use discipline as the vehicle to attain it!