Disappear and Reappear: 7 Questions to Transform Your Life Like Lady Gaga

Why is it that Lady Gaga disappears for so long between albums?

Here’s a quick rundown of the number of days between her studio album releases:?

• 461 days: The Fame ?? The Fame Monster
• 546 days: The Fame Monster ?? Born This Way
• 903 days: Born This Way ?? Artpop
• 375 days: Artpop ?? Cheek to Cheek
• 700 days: Cheek to Cheek ?? Joanne
• 1316 days: Joanne ?? Chromatica

Side bar: Did you know she’s got an upcoming role in the sequel to the movie Joker, with Joaquin Phoenix?

The sequel is titled:

Joker: Folie à Deux

Check out the trailer on YouTube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?8v=xy8aJw1vYHo ?

Ok, so, why is it that Lady Gaga disappears for so long between albums?

I might have just answered that with the link to Joker 2, but let's keep it going. Could it be to focus on herself and her vision? Yep. And that's what we're going to talk about today.

Lady Gaga takes long breaks between studio albums to focus on herself and her vision.

It's not that she doesn't know what she wants; in fact, it's precisely the opposite.

She has a crystal clear view of what she does not want.         

Read that again.

She knows exactly what she does not want.

And, she's willing to put in the work to avoid those things.

This approach is ever so subtly different from simply knowing what you want and going after it.

By focusing on what she doesn't want, Lady Gaga can create paths that align with her truest desires and values, even if the specific outcome isn't always clear from the start – because she knows what she’s not after.

It's not always easy, but it's so worth it in the end.?

You can (and should) do the same thing.

It's all about asking yourself the right questions and being honest about your fears, desires, and values.

Let’s jump into seven powerful self-reflection questions that will help guide you on your own journey of self-discovery and transformation.

By the end of it, you might just find yourself disappearing for a few months and coming back as a whole new person, ready to take on the world.

1) What Are Your Aspirations and Fears?

Label these your Dreams and Dreads. Here you’ll define your ideal future and the outcomes you want to avoid. This sets the stage for your personal growth journey.

Think about these points:

• Picture your ideal life, be vivid about it. What does your career look like? Your relationships, health, and your personal growth? These are your dreams.
• Identify what parts of your current life you want to change or eliminate entirely. These are your dreads.
• Now write this stuff down. Go back to your dreams and dreads often to stay motivated and focused.

Remember, your dreams and dreads are not set in stone. You might want to head west to San Diego, but you stopped over in Austin and decided to stay. That’s ok. That’s great even. As you grow and change, your aspirations and fears will invariably evolve, so be open to refining them over time.

2) What Is Your Purpose and What Principles Must You Uphold?

Label this your Purpose and Principles. Put pen to paper and draft your life purpose and the principles you need to uphold in order to achieve your goals.?

Consider the following:

• Put together a purpose statement for yourself, one that encapsulates your reason for being and the impact you want to make.
• Identify the principles and core values that align with your purpose. Are you looking at honesty, excellence, or creativity? Trust, credibility, character, what else?
• Audit yourself. What do your habits and behaviors say about you? Determine which ones help or hurt your purpose.

Remember, your purpose and principles are a compass, guiding your decisions and actions. The way you stay on track is by staying true to them.

3) How Can You Transform Your Purpose into Achievable Goals and Initiatives?

Label these your Goals and Initiatives. Break down your purpose into achievable goals and initiatives. Be sure to make your aspirations more tangible and attainable than theoretical.

Here are a few tips:

• Set SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound) goals that align with your purpose.
• Divide your goals into smaller, manageable initiatives with clear milestones and deadlines!
• Create a timeline, a roadmap, or a Gantt chart that outlines your goals, their initiatives, and track your progress.

Remember, breaking your purpose into smaller goals and initiatives makes the journey less stressful and allows you to regularly celebrate small wins along the way.

4) Are Your Decisions Aligned with Your Aspirations and Purpose?

Label these Alignment and Self-Reflection. Always make choices that are in line with your goals and purpose, and keep an eye on your progress and any setbacks.?

Food for thought:

• Every so often, look at your decisions and actions and ask yourself if they help you reach your goals and fulfill your purpose.
• You can develop and strengthen your self-reflection by examining your own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, and especially how they impact your progress.
• Celebrate your successes (pizza party!) and learn from your setbacks. Both are equally useful to keep the growth momentum going, and course correct, when necessary.

Remember, alignment and self-reflection are never-ending processes. Regularly checking in with yourself and making adjustments when necessary will ensure you maintain that positive momentum and stay on track.

5) What Abilities, Insights, and Mentorship Do You Need to Acquire?

Label this section Learning, Exploration, and Mentorship. It’s critical that you prioritize continuous learning, exploration, and seeking guidance from mentors who have relevant experiences.

Consider the following:

• Identify the abilities and insights gaps that you need to fill in order to achieve your goals. Here’s a must: Create a learning plan.
• Don’t be afraid to explore new or different strategies, techniques, and approaches to find what works best for you.
• And seek out mentors who have expertise in areas where you need guidance. While you’re at it, become a mentor for someone else.

Remember, growth comes from learning on your own, exploring, and getting help from other people. By using all three, you can speed up your progress and expand your perspective.

6) What Boundaries Can You Set to Encourage Ingenuity and Concentration?

We’re labeling these Boundaries and Catalysts. Here you’ll identify and set boundaries that encourage ingenuity and help you concentrate on the key catalysts that will drive you forward.

Here’s how:

• Embrace your limitations. Use them to your advantage by first coming to terms with them, and then forcing yourself to think creatively to find innovative alternatives.
• Identify the key catalysts or actions that will drive the greatest impact on your progress. Put them at the top of your list.
• Eliminate or minimize distractions that drain your time and energy. Ahem, social media.

Remember, boundaries themselves can be a catalyst for growth. By focusing on what matters most and working with set limits, you’re able to focus and optimize your efforts.

7) How Can You Embrace Discomfort and Maintain a Love for Learning?

For this last one, we’re labeling it Discomfort and Discovery. Embrace discomfort. That’s a complete sentence. Know your own skill level well enough that you’re inspired (read: forced) to learn and adapt.

Consider the following:

• Go outside your comfort zone, but stay within your capabilities.
• Cultivate a growth mindset. View your discomfort as an opportunity to learn and improve.
• Stay curious and open-minded. Explore new ideas, perspectives, people, and possibilities.

Remember, growth regularly lies right at the edge of discomfort. By embracing challenge and change, and maintaining a love for learning, you’ll continue to evolve and adapt. You’re in it for the long-haul.

Ultimately, You Want To Make Better Decisions

Today, you are the result of the choices you've made in the past. Who do you think is responsible for who you become in the future? Better decisions come from perspective and perception. Just like Lady Gaga took a step back from recording in order to focus on acting, you need to take a step back and focus precisely on what you don't want in your life. Identify your fears, desires, and values, and use them as a guide to create paths that align with your truest self.

At the end of every day, zoom out to remind yourself of what you don't want, and make choices that steer you away from those things for a better tomorrow. It's not about having a specific outcome or destination in mind, but rather about knowing what you're not after. By doing this, you can create a future that aligns with your authentic desires and values. When I decided to get a doctoral degree, I had no idea when, where, how, or in what subject. I just knew why. And that “why” was the fuel I needed to complete that promise to myself.

Lady Gaga's success isn't just about knowing what she wants; it's about being crystal clear on what she doesn't want and putting in the work to avoid those things. You can (and should) do the same. Let failure happen – it's a natural part of the process. But learn from it and use it to make better decisions for a better tomorrow.

Create a roadmap that starts with establishing a clear vision and mission, then break it down into actionable steps. Keep yourself aligned and aware of your progress, optimize your efforts through education and experimentation, and push yourself to grow and adapt continuously.

In the realm of raising kids, that last bit is akin to the concepts of The Zone of Proximal Development (ZPD). ZPD is defined as the space between what a learner can do without assistance, and what they can do with the help of peers who are better at the task. By embracing discomfort and seeking help when needed, you can transform your life and come back as a whole new person, ready to take on the world – just like Lady Gaga.

"Tell me somethin', girl

Are you happy in this modern world?

Or do you need more?

Is there somethin' else you're searchin' for?"

Now that the song is in your head, here's the music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bo_efYhYU2A

Hashtags for the bots:

#GrowthMindset

#PersonalGrowthJourney

#SelfDiscovery

#LadyGaga

Parents!

Want to build a similar growth mindset in your children? Check out my book "Raising Tomorrow's Leaders: The Consultant's Mindset", available now on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Raising-Tomorrows-Leaders-Consultants-Fostering/dp/B0CZCZJ9SF