Did You Know Perfectionism is a Form of Procrastination?

A coach told me, "I promised people my book would be available several months ago, and I've still not finished it. It's embarrassing. Any suggestions?"

I told him, “If there's anything I've learned in twenty years of helping people get their creative projects out in the world, it's that perfectionism is a form of procrastination.

If we try to get it perfect, we never get it done because perfection is an exercise in futility."

"I agree with that. I just don't know what to do about it."

I shared these steps with him. Thought you find them helpful also.

How to Overcome The 3 P's of Perfectionism, Pessimism, Procrastination

1. Put a launch date on the calendar. If you don't have a date on the calendar, it's not getting done. Once you commit to a launch date, you can reverse-engineer the deliverables so you know exactly what you need to do every week. It gives you something tangible to work towards instead of a wishy-washy "I really need to finish my book" vagueness. As the saying goes, hope is not a strategy.

2. Pick a starting place. General Patton said, "If you don't know where to begin, you don't begin." Decide each chapter will be ten pages or less. Short chapters set up the Psychology of Completion. Instead of readers having to plow through long chapters, feeling they're not making any progress, they get a little dopamine thrill each time they finish a chapter and are motivated to keep reading. Setting a goal of writing a chapter a week is do-able rather than daunting.

4. Don't re-read what you've written. If you do, you'll re-write what you've written. At the end of a month, you'll have the same pages, and they won't necessarily be better, they'll just be different.

The coach pushed back, "Really?! You're saying I shouldn't review my work?"

"Review after you finish your draft manuscript.

If you edit as you go, there goes the flow. Your VOICE is in your first draft. If you second-guess it, it won't come out and play because criticism chases it away."

He said, "Okay, I'll give it a try."

"Don't just try, it, commit to it. Producing pages produces forward progress and that's when you get in the flow of thinks (not a typo).

5. Tell yourself a NEW story about your project. Tara Conklin says, "Our greatest work of art is the story we tell about ourselves." Some people tell themselves negative stories, "This is a waste of time, I'll never get this done." It's more helpful to say, "I am so grateful to be writing this book. I've wanted to do this for a long time. I will always be glad I persevered, kept my promise to myself, and got my book out in the world."

6. Keep your project in-sight, in-mind. It's easy to forget about projects in our head or on our laptop because we've got so many other priorities. Post a picture of your book covert where you'll see it every day. Every client who's posted a book cover on their frig finished their book because it stayed top-of-mind instead of drifting out-of-sight, out-of-mind.

7. Go it together vs. going it alone. New York Times bestselling author James Rollins told our Maui Writers Conference audience the only way he finished his first book - while running his own full time veterinary practice - was with the help of a writers support group at his local Barnes & Noble in Davis, CA. Ask a friend, family member, or fellow/sister author to be a cheerleader and accountability buddy to keep you going through creativity's roller coaster ups and downs.

8. Reframe what it means to write and stop waiting for open time. Do you know anyone who has "free" time? Writing doesn't have to be at a desk, it can be done anywhere, anytime. Take a notebook with you everywhere you go. When an idea occurs to you, ink it when you think it. Or use the voice recorder on your phone to capture your thoughts while they're hot. Whenever you're waiting, you could be writing. Understand that for writers, our life is our lab. Follow the profound advice of Mary Oliver, "Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it."

The coach asked one more time, "I still worry it won't be perfect."

I told him, "You're right, it won't be perfect, however your stories and insights will be out in the world making a positive difference, and that's better than them sitting on your laptop because you're still trying to get every word right."

Tina Fey tells a marvelous story about this in her book Bossy Pants. She was rushing to finish a skit at SNL and Lorne Michaels told her to wrap it up.

She protested, ‘But Lorne, it’s not ready.’

He laughed, ‘Tina, the show doesn’t go on because it’s ready. It goes on because it’s 11:30.’”

Exactly.

It’s time to pick an 11:30 for your project.

If you don’t, it may never get out the door. That doesn't help anyone. Write on!