Did I Shed the Heavy? A 6 month update
Artwork by Leo Gaona

Did I Shed the Heavy? A 6 month update

Six months ago, I set out on the quest to Shed the Heavy: Letting Go of What is Weighing Me Down. I marked the occasion by taking my first outdoor run in my new neighborhood.?

During that run, a multitude of thoughts swirled in my head about how the next six months would go. I thought of all the ways that life was hard, unfair, and not going my way. I also had thoughts of how I was very fortunate to be where I was, living in my dream home, and surrounded by a healthy family (and dogs). I soaked those thoughts and feelings in and documented them here.

I marked the final day of the six month journey with another run. The main difference with this run is that I intended to get to the end of the run with a fully written article inside my head, but instead I had nothing.?

Why??

Because during that run I had no thoughts swirl. I had zero mind chatter. I simply ran. I had no path when I set out on my run. I simply followed where my feet led.?

This might not seem like major progress, but for me is the biggest win I have experienced over the past six months.?

  • No head chatter
  • No thought swirl?


Here is the detailed report card of the 6-month quest:?

I set out to shed three things over the course of this experience:

1: The actual weight on my body = Grade 8.5/10

If I were grading this simply by the scale, it would be closer to a 3/10, but my units of measurement changed over the 6 month quest. While the scale didn’t budge much, I feel stronger, more confident and in tune with my body. I started lifting weights consistently. I’ve been eating more mindfully. The big win is that I wore a bikini on my recent spring break, which is something I haven’t done in nearly eight years. I wore it not because I had before/after bikini photo moments to document, but because I felt confident in my skin.

For nearly my whole life, I have felt like I needed to look a certain way, and if I couldn’t do that, to cover up and camouflage. During this part of the quest, I realized that I was the only person who needed to release this idea and embraced that this part of the quest isn’t about how I look, but how I feel. I want to feel strong, confident, and rock out a bikini whenever I feel like it. That’s a win!?

2: The heavy thoughts that swirl in my head = 9/10

Per the introduction to this article, minimizing the thought swirl is amazing progress. It was also the hardest part of the journey because my Judge is loud. Ever present. Cruel. Once I realized AND understood that I am always at choice, the quest changed. I could choose anger, resentment, shame, blame, guilt or any other negative emotion OR I could choose love.?

I decided it is that simple.

CHOOSE LOVE.

And I had it tattooed on my wrist as a permanent memory.

Choose Love tattoo - photo taken by author

3: The drag I put on my own potential by seeking comfort in my Zone of Excellence while avoiding my Zone of Genius = 15/10

This is where I am most proud of my progress. Even though I’ve written a book about being your true self and serve as a coach to others to help them step into vulnerability and authenticity, I was NOT living my life this way. I put myself into a shell for many NOT GOOD reasons. As I examined each of these reasons in my hand like a curious 5-year old, I realized that:?

  • No one cares about my title
  • No one cares how I pay my bills?
  • No one cares if I’m sharing my own content or the powerful content of others?

Others DO CARE and CAN FEEL when I am being myself fully in the world. When I do that they cheer. They get inspired. They become more vulnerable and authentic themselves. They grow and get better on their life journey.

This realization made it feel safe to put myself back into the world again. I came out of the shell that I artificially manufactured around me over the past few years.?

This led to the greatest piece of work I have created over the past six months:?my speaker reel. I’ve determined it is much more than a speaker reel. Speaker reels are usually 2-3 minutes of your “best stuff” to prove that you can stand in front of an audience and deliver a powerful message. I chose to break this convention and produced a 7.5 minute video that shared the story of Let Her Out, and along the way, demonstrates that I can stand in front of a live or virtual audience and deliver a powerful message. This video:

  • Tells my story
  • Is 100% ME
  • Will generate opportunities and breathe a new life into Let Her Out

Speaker Reel Cover

In turn, this piece of work will allow me to do more of the work that I love - the work in my Zone of Genius.

While I eliminated a great deal of work from my Zones of Competence and Excellence during the quest, I also was reminded that when I spend even a fraction of time more in my Zone of Genius, work needed in other areas feels easier and lighter.?

If that isn’t Shedding the Heavy, I don’t know what is.?


Bottom line: When you put in the work on yourself, you feel different.

And the work never stops.?

That is the greatest learning of this journey: keep going.?

Being healthy, decreasing the thought swirl and spending time in my Zone of Genius aren’t “check the box” activities. I will keep putting in the work.

Every. Single. Day.?

The following quote that came from one of my program colleagues is my new mantra:

"I think you should keep going just to see what happens."?

I’m not going anywhere, so stick with me to see what happens next!??


Thank you for reading this article. I draw on my experiences as a coach, author and speaker, as well as my roles of wife, daughter, mother, sister and friend to create content on meaningful connections and living authentically. I'm currently documenting my 6-month Quest to "Shed the Heavy" and invite you to subscribe and follow along. Other work that might be of interest: 52 Weeks of Meaningful Connections and my bestselling book Let Her Out: Reclaim Who You Have Always Been.


Pam Reyes

A Catalyst for Leaders Ready to Lead on Your Own Terms | Transformational Leadership Development Strategist | Team Culture Builder

7 个月

Bravo Natalie Siston, such an inspiration to reach beyond to our zone of genius! ??

回复
Toni Crow

Coaching heart-centred leaders and teams in tech, sciences, and engineering. Evolve towards authenticity, wellbeing, healthy relationships, and impactful performance.

7 个月

That is a lot of heavy going poof and a lot of light and love, Natalie! You are inspiring! Thankful for your share ??

回复
Keely Cormier

Global Operations Exec | Change Leadership | Scaling & Expansion | Culture Building | Business Growth

7 个月

Love your reflections. Thank you for sharing your journey. A great inspiration! ??

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Kevin Moreau ~ Mr. Mingle ??

?? Empowering Misfits to Unleash their Superpowers & Thrive ?? Creator of the Happy Misfits Movement ??? Speaker, Teacher & Podcast Host ? Social Catalyst ?? Owlistic Coach ?? Open Networker

7 个月

Wow, what a wonderful share, Natalie Siston! ?? "putting in the work. Every. Single. Day." is such a massive game-changer! As embracing self-compassion & self-forgiveness whenever we miss a day & feel bad about it. Thank you for the inspiration ??

回复

Amazingly authentic and powerful story congratulations and see whst happens next is a great thought to hold

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