Did I learn anything from Irrfan Khan?

A lot I think! 

So let's take a glance at What did I learn from Irrfan Khan? I must say that I have been deeply saddened, and I am wondering why! I never met the man, I haven't seen many of his movies, I haven't been a fan of his, then why? 

I did reflect on my having tears for this man and here is what I could gather. 

Like all of us have teachers in various forms, shapes, size; I guess he had been one through his movies and his persona/beingness. Here is a reflection on my learnings from the news I have been reading. 

1. Resilience: Khan made his film debut with a small role in Salaam Bombay! (1988), which was followed by years of struggle. After starring in the British film The Warrior (2001), he had his breakthrough with starring roles in the dramas Haasil (2003) and Maqbool (2004). From 1988 to 2003, imagine the resilience and persistence and never give-up-attribute of this actor !! The world saw the very same resilience during the last two years since the time he was diagnosed with the rare disease . Remarkable !

2. Speak less-Listen and absorb more: Look at this excerpt from Indian Express - A lanky boy with a head of curly hair, Irrfan was one of the quietest students in the class of 1987. His classmates, such as Bharti Sharma,founder of Kshitij Theater Society in Delhi, used to wonder, “Pata nahin yeh itna chup kyun rahta hai?’ “ He never missed any class but he also did not participate in discussions. It was only when he performed that we understood that Irrfan was a person who believed in listening rather than speaking. He had absorbed everything we were taught and was implementing it in his performance,” she adds. Look what marvelous performer he turned out to be just by listening! 

3. Constantly improving: Dinesh Khanna, who was a year senior to Irrfan and his close friend, says the actor, who was shy in person, was always trying to push the envelop on stage. “He was never satisfied with his acting and constantly trying to improve,” says Khanna. Sincere and committed are how his former classmates describe him.The perfect recipe to excel ! 

4. Empathy and caring: He would stand by the people he worked with. Support and care for them. Anup Singh who directed him in Qissa reminisces “While shooting Qissa, I once walked off the set because of a problem with one of the producers. Later that night, Irrfan came into my room with his music system. He set it up himself and then played the music of Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan for me for hours. It was only early in the morning that he left when he finally saw me smiling. He was just as giving with his co-actors.  With Tillotama Shome, for instance, during the same shoot, he would never give her advice but if he saw that she was nervous, he would point to a bird or crack a small joke. Those of us who knew him, watched him on the screen, were bequeathed a legacy whether we realise it or not. 

What we do with that legacy will define us. An artist of his passion leaves behind something ineffable and yet more powerful than a thousand suns. He leaves behind the truth of feelings. Love, anger, joy, compassion. He has left us intimations of depths of feeling.”

5. Conviction, Clarity and Guts: He would give a clear yes or no to a script. He did say no to many international projects, ones he did not believe in.

6. Perfection: This is what his wife Sutapa mentioned in the family statement "It’s unbelievable for us but I would put it in Irrfan’s words, “it’s magical” whether he is there or not there, and that’s what he loved, he never loved one dimensional reality. The only thing I have a grudge against him is; he has spoiled me for life. His strive for perfection doesn’t let me settle for ordinary in any thing. There was a rhythm which he always saw in everything, even in cacophony and chaos, so I have learnt to sing and dance to the music of that rhythm, even with my tone-deaf voice and two left feet."

7. Parenting: This one is not from Irrfan the person but the character he played in his last film, Angrezi Medium. 

He demonstrated the actions of a father of a daughter who wanted to achieve her dreams. 

I watched that movie along with my daughter just last week and both ended up having tears. Aaha! Now I know, possibly, why I was so sad. Irrfan connected to us through his characters and with this thought that he would always be doing for eternity, I feel a bit better...