Did I ever tell you about the time - Iguana Edition

Did I ever tell you about the time I went for auditions for You're a Star and got sh!t on by an iguana!?

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Back in the day, it was one of the first talent competitions that we saw here in Ireland.

I was living in Dublin, and a friend of mine suggested we go and give it a shot.

I had been in a band, loved to sing, and my dad always reckoned my sisters and I should have made an album. We were blessed with singing voices.

But I never had any longing to go enter a competition. It wasn't even on my radar.

So I said yes and off we went.?

We queued up and waited our turn for the first audition, she went in and came out so disappointed as she had not gotten through. It was my turn next so off in I went, and my knees started to knock together, and my lip started to tremble like an Elvis impersonator. Funny, I still get that now, right when I start to speak at a seminar OR when I'm doing shoulders in the gym.

Anyway, there were the 3 judges, Linda Martin, Brendan O'Connor , and another guy I can't remember. I went in, belted out Beverly Craven - Promise Me, and would you believe, I got through round one.

My friend had left, so I was hanging around with all the other successful talent, delighted with ourselves, and a bit nervous about the whole thing.

There were all sorts around, some super talented, some not at all but who thought or believed they were, and some in the middle.

It was so cool listening to people practice a wide and diverse spectrum of things right there in the Helix.

I was taking it all in, and my name was called for the second round.

In I went, sang my brains out and got through, though, Linda Martin was not happy about it. But the 2 lads liked me and they pushed for it.?

When I left the second time I went out to wait again, and spotted a girl with a very big iguana.

He was gorgeous. I was instantly hooked and wanted to hold him.

Something to note here, at these auditions for You're a Star, I was wearing a cream knitted dress, CREAM!

I asked her if I could hold him, she said no problem and popped him on my shoulder, where he promptly sh!t green and brown poo down the front of my dress.

My cream dress!

At an audition!

Where I had no change of clothes!!!!!

Jaysus!

All I could do was laugh, make a joke about it being good luck, and come up with a solution while every single person around me howled with laughter! People were telling other people to come have a look at 'yer wan who got sh!t on by an iguana'!

I took a minute to think and realised the solution was simple.?

I had my hair down and was wearing a cool fedora hat, the whole ensemble was a vibe ... but I had to improvise. So I tied up my hair, pulled the ponytail to the side and ... draped the ponytail down over the sh!t.?

Popped back on the fedora and got ready for round 3.

Now my dress had sh!t on it, my hair had shIt on it, and I was up next!?

I walked in, head held high and opened with ...

'So ... I just got poo'd on my an iguana, but I'm a positive person, so I'm gonna believe that that's good luck, a bit like when a bird poo's on you'

And smiled really wide!?

The 2 lads burst out laughing and asked if they could see, and Ms Martin chucked out a sarcastic laugh and an eye roll!?

She'd made her mind up before I even opened my mouth.

I sang my heart out again, and while the lads liked me, they deferred to herself, and that was the end of my audition experience.?

I learned a lot that day.

1. Friendship sometimes can't withstand one person winning if the other isn't.

2. When you go for something, go all in no matter what. Full ass everything, no half ass shizzle!

3. Don't hold someone else's iguana when you're wearing a cream dress at an audition.

4. If you do, figure it out, make it work and smile like you're winning, because even if you aren't? ... you are!

5. Make sure that the thing that stops you doing something is NEVER yourself!

XOXO

Ciara