Developing Empathy: The Superpower of Extraordinary Leaders

Without a doubt, empathy is an amazing superpower. And it makes for extraordinary leaders.

When leaders act with kindness they are able to connect not just intellectually through work, but also emotionally and mentally with their team members. Leaders who act empathetically in everything they do truly and genuinely understand people, care for them and, consequently, make better decisions. And, for the naysayers who think that empathy is fluffy and only works to make people feel better, but not to do better work, here it is: leaders who act more empathetically are better prepared to navigate complex challenges while building resilient teams and stronger organizational culture. In addition, research shows that empathy is essential to business success. For example, studies have shown that people would be willing to work longer hours for empathetic leaders and recommend that leader and the company to others.

A culture of empathy is an ultracompetitive culture. Organizations that embrace, encourage, practice and celebrate empathy in their leaders have higher levels of employee engagement, satisfaction, a better workplace experience, high productivity, better performance and, consequently, deliver better overall financial results. A study by Harvard Business Review found that empathetic leaders have in themselves and their teams higher levels of performance and well-being, simultaneously!

Empathy is generally described as the ability and awareness to understand and sense other people’s emotions and feelings, and the ability to imagine ourselves in their place and what someone else might be thinking or feeling.

For leaders, empathy means that they can see themselves feeling a similar experience as described by another person in the team, even if they haven't gone or are not going through that experience. That’s why empathy is extremely powerful to build better and more meaningful relationships, which has a radical positive effect at work for the purposes of more effective cooperation and collaboration. In addition, Empathy fosters the emergence of behaviors associated with help and support to others, which is more than positive when organizations are going through difficulties and adversities. No wonder why empathy is like magic and why it is important as a leaders’ superpower.

However, we know that many leaders (and people in general) have difficulties developing empathy. In part, this is because the stigma of empathy as softness, weakness, fluffiness or something else that only serves the purpose of making people feel better and not delivering business results. But, as we will see, empathy is not about being nice, or avoiding conflicts or not making tough decisions, which can lead to confusion. Empathy is a big umbrella and being assertive, facing and resolving conflict and making tough decisions can still be done while still being an empathetic leader. In this context, empathy would be about truly and genuinely understanding and caring for others, and responding to them in an effective and caring way. As a matter of fact, research shows that empathy leaders to better decision-making, conflict resolution and innovation.

These are some recommendations for leaders to develop their empathy superpower.

Developing Empathy

Learn to Listen to Understand

Most people listen with the intent to respond, and not to understand. Test it in yourself: think about what you think about when you are listening to others and you will see. However, listening with the intent to understand is being fully present, physically, mentally and emotionally, when someone else is speaking. When leaders listen with the intent to understand they have a better chance to put themselves in their interlocutor’s shoes. Research shows that leaders who listen with the intent to understand rather than to respond are leaders whose teams are more engaged.

Go for It: Seek Feedback

Leaders who actively seek feedback from their team members intentionally and purposefully are showing two things. The first, that they care about people say about them. The second is that they will act on that feedback to improve as a leader. Feedback helps people understand how their actions impact others. Actively seeking feedback sends a strong message to the team that translates in more empowerment and engagement. In fact, research shows that employees are more likely to stay in their organization for longer time when the leaders listen to their feedback.

Be Very Curious

Asking relevant, mindful, thoughtful and genuine questions is one of the most powerful building blocks of empathy. Asking questions means that the leaders want to find out more and understand better. When leaders ask questions they are sending the message that they acknowledge that they don’t have all the information, and also that they value other people’s contribution. Leaders who are curious display high levels of emotional intelligence which, in turn, inspire and engage their teams.

Embrace and Show Vulnerability

What better way to inspire others to be vulnerable and feel included than when the very leader is embracing and showing vulnerability about him, her or themselves? Leaders who show vulnerability by taking the risks to emotionally expose themselves to others create a strong environment of trust and safety. This is conductive to better communication, creativity, inclusion, belonging, collaboration and much more.

Act with Kindness and Compassion

Kindness is about being compassionate, considerate and caring for other people without the expectation of getting something in return for it. When leaders act with kindness and compassion they actively use their talents, resources and leverage to improve other people’s lives by leading with authentic acts of love, generosity, compassion, care and, especially, service. Science shows that kindness is as positive for the recipient as it is for the giver and the observer. Thus, when leaders act with kindness and compassion, kindness is reinforced in them while others are inspired by it. Leaders who act with kindness and compassion create the conditions for higher levels of employee well-being and job engagement and satisfaction.

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is about being present in the moment and aware of thoughts, emotions, and sensations. Leaders who practice mindfulness can be more attentive and responsive to the needs of the team members.

Regulate Emotions

Emotional regulation is an active and conscious act of managing one’s emotions and respond to the emotions of others in an effective way. Empathy requires emotional regulation and leaders who practice it are significantly more effective in managing conflicts, building relationships, and making decisions.

Invest in Empathy

For some leaders, empathy can be a significantly difficult challenge to learn and embrace. In these cases, it is important for leaders to find ways to invest in empathy training programs or coaching.

Practice gratitude

Gratitude is about being thankful and appreciative. One of the most powerful drivers of employee engagement is appreciation at work. Yet, most employees still report that their leaders do not show signs of gratitude on a consistent basis. For some leaders it requires a lot of effort to unlearning, learning and relearning to finally embrace the goodness and positive effects of gratitude.

Celebrate Empathy

When leaders celebrate empathy they are sending a strong message: that they care so much about it as to make it an actual cause of celebration. When empathy is celebrated, empathy is encouraged.

The Road to Empathy

Empathy is an amazing superpower. But, because of confusion, misunderstanding and outright rejection of the science of the benefits of empathy, many leaders don’t even know how to be empathetic at work. And, just like training a physical muscle in our bodies, training for empathy will require going to the “gym” (the empathy gym) and strengthening the weak muscles.

The training includes listening, being open-minded, seeking feedback, celebrating empathy, and much more. And this training is essential. It’s not enough for a leader to attend an “empathy course” if there’s no practice. This would be like watching a video on how to get strong muscles but never lifting weights to make it happen.

The benefits of empathy for leaders are undeniable. Empathetic leaders build stronger relationships with their people, make better decisions (even when those decisions are tough), inspire and encourage more creativity and innovation, create a more positive work environment, foster inclusivity and belonging. And the impact of all this is not just in “making people feel better”, but also about increasing employee engagement and job satisfaction, which lead to higher productivity and better performance.

All in all, empathy is quite the superpower and, just as science and also people’s perception demonstrate, empathetic leaders create the right conditions for their teams and organizations to outperform those where empathy doesn’t exist.

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By Enrique Rubio, Founder at Hacking HR