THE DETOXIFICATION OF FEMINISM

No one of a reasonable mindset would disagree that we should subscribe to “equality of opportunity” for women. But, as with any “ism”, feminism has taken on an ideological fervour — and one that can be as dangerous as some of the people who purport to speak in its name. In this sense, in this article, a man from the West, and a woman from Asia, combine forces — in order to attempt the first step towards the “detoxification of feminism”.

Why I cannot call myself a “Feminist” at the moment — [Mathew Warboys]

For me, in the Western context at least, feminism has become, at best, a movement without a cause — and, at worst, a very dangerous ideological crusade.

Do not get me wrong, I believe in “equality of opportunity” for all people — but I do not believe in the abhorrent concept of “equity” (which is the modern buzzword for “equality of outcome”).

This is one of the most dangerous concepts that the world has ever seen — and I refuse to subject the women in my life whom I care about to this scourge. We often hear dangerous slogans like: “50% of CEOs should be women” — when I prefer to ask women whether they actually wish to be a CEO or not — not force them into such.

At the same time, we hear constant reference to the non-existent “gender pay gap” — when there is, in fact, only a “motherhood pay gap”. It may well be that you do not believe that being a mother is important — and that is not a fine opinion, but at least it is consistent. On the other hand, I prefer to ask women whether they wish to forego an element of cash — in order to induce effective parenting, and a better family life.

It does not make sense to me to refer to the “tyrannical patriarchy” when four times as many men commit suicide than women across the world.

Because, at least in the West, “equality of opportunity” has been achieved for most women — and has thus rendered feminism to be a movement without a cause — that is probably why we are now talking about such misguided factors as whether the length of eye contact with a woman should be policed at work instead.

No doubt women suffer sexual harassment — and that is abhorrent — I know, it is something that I have experienced on several occasions from women as well.

There are probably a number of people standing by to provide me with a list of other factors of discrimination for women — and I would not necessarily deny them. But, at the same time, a comparable list can be provided for men as well.

In the end, I believe that this boils down to the fact that it is not a competition — we should eradicate suffering on an individual basis.

No doubt I do not have credibility on this topic — as a mouthpiece for white male middle-class privilege — but the great news is that such post-modern identity politics is not going to be my judge on this. I do not subscribe to its attempted authority or power over me.

An attempt to detoxify feminism — [Ashita Verma]

The world is a random place. A cruel place. A beautiful place. Not all men are rapists, not all women are callous opportunists running behind your jobs.

We live in a so-called male dominating society. And there is dominance indeed, but we are no longer in the 1970s where a girl can’t stand up for herself. Today we have twisted every argument, every opportunity in the name of ‘feminism’, that this word is polluted, and has lost its way. And if we go on at this pace, we will be living in a female-dominating society by 2060, and men would be fighting for ‘Masculinism’.

Think about it. If male dominance is wrong, female dominance is wrong too.

Feminism demands equal rights for men and women. Feminism isn’t about just females, it is for men too. Can’t we consider everyone as people?  We are already living in 2020, the world has changed, we don’t have just two genders, there are so many.

Remember Jasleen Kaur’s case in Tilak Nagar area of Delhi, 2015? She accused Saravjeet Singh of harassing her, and the guy was filed with so many charges against Indian Penal Court. But those allegations turned out to be fake, after a year. Till then, his life was destroyed completely. There are thousands of cases that happen and some of them being just a ‘make-belief’. Incidents like these are proof men are suffering too.

In India, 88 rape cases are reported each day according to the National Crime Records Bureau. Female foeticide is still a trend, a girl is expected to get married soon after her graduation. A female is expected to be dependent first on her father, then her husband and later her son. A girl is well capable of standing alone, rather better said as it’s her choice. We do need to stand up for such causes. But not at the stake of stepping on men.

We want equal opportunities. We must get equal opportunities. Reservation system must not be there in the name of ‘feminism’. We are not at a place yet where females get equal rights at the workplace in India but that’s the point. Why do we have to label the gender? Why can’t we label the skills? A hardworking person, committed towards work, has the right skill set should be paid accordingly irrespective of the gender.

The world through the lens of a 22-year-old, Indian girl should not be gender-specific. We are all people, we must work on the morals of individualism. Today’s woman can do everything a man can do. She can be a mother and a CEO or a housewife, no one has a right to question that. Similarly, a man can have paternity leaves to spend time with their toddler without being made fun of by society. We are all people with different choices, and no movements must be stretched to a point that they harm others.

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The conversation has started. The “detoxification of feminism” has begun. We hope that you shall wish to partake in the programme for change. Let us liberate men and women from the ideological crusade that “feminism” has become. A brighter — and more harmonious — future is awaiting our effort here.

Mathew Warboys: Mathew is the CEO of The CEO Hub — a digital and creative marketing agency. Mathew has been shortlisted three times for the so-called “Junior Nobel Prize” (and therefore attended an Awards Ceremony with the President of Ireland in 2015). Mathew is now leading a campaign about male mental health and suicide prevention — due to his own personal struggles in the past — and has played a key role in supporting the up and coming “International Men’s Day” (on Thursday 19th November 2020).

Ashita Verma: Ashita Verma is a Content Marketer with xMonks and Erickson India, having leading coaches from all over India. She is among India’s top 100 content writers with the 52nd position by contracts and freelancers list 2020. Ashita has contributed to ‘THE INDIAN PEN ANTHOLOGY’, India’s 8th hottest release on Amazon in the month of September. Ashita is currently working on a crime fiction coming up in 2021.