Destiny and Why the End May Only be a New Beginning!

I am certain that I cannot be the only person on the planet that ‘ponders the great imponderables’. Surely there are others who, from time to time, wonder if there is such as thing as destiny, as fate? Questions that test our very reason for being or even what kind of being we are – really. Where is life leading us? Is there life after death? What do I believe?

For me, it was time to integrate the various thoughts and ideas, feelings, perceptions, beliefs – what I heard and read and over the years to try and make some sense out of it all. To me that seems like a worthwhile exercise, or am I just kidding myself?

By the time you are through reading this you may just consider this to be the ‘idle ramblings of a crazy old man’! That will be your 'choice'. However, I would be interested in knowing your views or whether, in fact, this piece has stimulated your thinking. Maybe you have been having similar thoughts over time as well and now this article can act as a catalyst to bring them together and tell a story – your story as you see it, feel it, believe it. Perhaps that story will be quite different from mine. So, here we go, off into the ‘wild blue yonder’!

Is there an inevitable succession of events that creates the colorful if not sometimes desperate or tragic mosaic of life?

Are we on a journey much akin to a ‘runaway train’ just waiting for the inevitable ‘crash’ to occur?

I can only speak to my perceptions – listen to my feelings on this subject. Each person must make up their own mind – come to some conclusion they are comfortable with – or avoid the issue all together, which most seem to do.

For me, I believe that we are all predestined – that the ultimate destination we reach, whether quickly or lengthy in terms of time travel, whether painful or pleasurable has been ordained and we cannot escape it despite our best efforts. No matter what we do in terms of the choices we make during our lifetime, we end up where we are supposed to be – in that larger order of things – a small life in the large universe.

Our choices, made daily, merely result in us experiencing more or less pain, disruption, pleasure or happiness (the continuous pursuit and achievement of worthwhile goals) along the way. But in no case does it change the ultimate course of things or for that matter the ultimate destination we reach in terms of achievement, contribution, relationships, wisdom.

In my opinion, the only thing in life you can control are your choices. We, as human beings, were given free will. Those choices will inevitably define who we are and what we become. In any situation you have a choice you can make. However, there is a ‘wild card’ and that is ‘society’. If you ever saw Stanley Kubrick’s ‘A Clockwork Orange’ about ultraviolence, you see that society can ultimately be an overwhelming force or influence on the choices you make. So while you still have control, in a sense, society and the cultural context in which you exist can have a powerful effect on you and the way you think – your attitudes and thus your behaviours - the choices you make.

However, I would say that it is also important at certain points on that journey to reflect on ‘what have been those defining moments’. To me a ‘defining moment’ is a point in time when some ‘trigger’ causes us to reflect on who we are, why we are here, where we are going, what we are doing and what we have done to get where we are. These, to me, are can be critical ‘inflection’ points in our life from which the learning associated with our experience – that defining moment, can act like a ‘mid-course’ correction to move us to a better place – or, again depending upon societal or cultural context, move us to what ultimately will lead to a path less travelled or one fraught with peril. Sorry for getting off the ‘beaten path’ here, but I did not want to miss the opportunity to get this little insight out in the open for your inspection or your own personal retrospection as the case may be.I found that creating a personal and/or a professional mission statement or statement of core purpose for my being to be very constructive and helpful - why do I exist? Try it, it may be a useful in terms of giving you clarity and focus.

For example, for many years my professional mission/purpose has been 'to share the wisdom gained from my 42 years of business around the world with senior executives and leaders of tomorrow in the hope of giving them insight, understanding and the inspiration to act on issues of strategic importance to their organisations'. While I have modified slightly over time, it remains largely intact - as I think it should. Your fundamental purpose - why you exist should not change like the changing direction of the wind. It must remain an anchor to keep you from drifting into uncharted or dangerous waters. Then, of course, there is a personal one mission as well which I will save for another post - possibly when I share the new 'human achievement model' I have been working on.

In any case, continuing on, you see in my mind, to consider the contrary view – that there is no destiny would, to me at least, say that ‘life is a totally random event’. I can’t accept that. It would say that if things fall into place in a good way or bad way, it is just coincidence – an accidental and seemingly unplanned sequence of events. Possibly what some refer to as ‘luck’, ‘fate’ or 'conicidence'?

To me, in effect, each of us is born with an ‘on/off’ switch built in. How many of us have had a ‘near death experience’? I know I have had at least three. It wasn’t my time – yet. But it will come as destiny decrees it will. That ‘on/off’ switch!

The key is making the most of our lives – trying to not only gain wisdom, build relationships of lasting value but to contribute in a meaningful while on that journey of life – not merely to mark time, keep a seat warm or sit idly by twiddling our thumbs while life passes us by or just think only about our own personal well-being.

We must stop merely being ‘interested in doing things’ as that will lead to an end of life situation in which you are tormented to the end of your days by saying to yourself, ‘I should have done that’ or “I wish I had done that’ or ‘Why didn’t I do that when I had the chance?’. Instead one must live with passion – gusto, energy and literally carpe diem! If life is to have meaning then it must be filled with fulfillment – not disappointment; positive thoughts, not negative ones. The scales must be tipped in the right direction or we end up being pushed by our problems and not led by our dreams.

I have always told my children, you have two choices in life. You can ‘let things happen’ to you in which case you become a ‘victim’ or you can ‘make things happen’. The worst thing you can do in life is do nothing. The fact of the matter is that the less you do the less you want to. You must dream – to imagine what could be. To me a person without imagination is like a bird without wings.

To me life is a gift. The way we bestow honor upon the giver of that gift is by what we do with that life. We only have one shot, make the best of it and take good aim!

Furthermore, in my opinion, what we refer to as the ‘spirit’ or ‘soul’ of a person is in fact an ‘energy force’ which is within each of us. Often it can be detected as ‘heat energy’ but other forms such as electromagnetic are also being discovered. Energy can neither be created nor destroyed. This is the famous ‘conservation of energy’ law of physics upon which much of what we know and understand about the way our universe works is based upon. However, energy can change form in which case then my theory is simply this:

When the human vessel we call a body ceases to function – in other words we die ‘physically’, that energy within us – the spirit or life essence is released into the universe. It never dies. It may, as stated above, however, change form at some point. Into what, who really knows? It is, I suppose much the same as a dirigible or blimp (Goodyear; Graf Zeppelin) is filled with hydrogen. When a discontinuity or rupture occurs and the integrity of the ship is compromised, the gas escapes into the universe, but the gas molecules continue to exist or combine with molecules of other gases such as oxygen. A fresh start in a new form? Who knows? But we can hope! It could be exciting!

The only question I have is whether the subconscious mind (possibly the conscious mind) – the thoughts, ideas and memories accompany the escape of that energy i.e., they are a part of it. If so, that would be good news especially for those who have believed in ‘life after death’ although life could be quite different – take on quite a different ‘form’ as the energy that was once within it may well be transformed. I would like to think it is so.

I mean, think about those ‘out of body’ experiences many people have had as they teetered between life and death in certain situations. They found themselves floating above their body looking down and observing what was going on. They were not aware, however, of what shape or form they really had during that ‘out of body’ experience, only that they could perceive and sense what was going on.

In speaking with these individuals who have survived, in virtually all cases we find out that there was a decision they had to make – to stay or to go, often, toward the bright light or cross a bridge to be with loved ones who had gone before them – there arms and hands outstretched to grab on to them as they come across the bridge. In that sense I suppose some consciousness must be present for otherwise how could a person in that ‘state’ be able to make the decision to stay or go?

So, in conclusion, for me, destiny is inescapable – what will be will be and nothing you do can change that fact. However, since life itself is all about the journey and not the destination, your actions – your choices can make a difference – they can bring more pleasure or pain. So be vigilant, work to experience more happiness than sadness. And look forward to something exciting in what might be the final act of life – yet another life in a different form. Who really knows?

Food for thought I suppose. Chew on it and see where you come out!