DESTINATION: UNKNOW

FULL CIRCLE

Insertion point: STL

Rally point: NEAR DOWNTOWN

Floating down through the clouds. Hoping the damn parachute opens? Is this the Serengeti? “The place where the land runs on forever”? Where’s Lake Victoria? That’s a river but it’s too big to be the Mara? Where am I? That’ll teach me about the blunderbuss. What have I gotten myself into this time? Where are the grasslands? Remnants of Mounds? That water is intoxicating. I’m MIA! A “(Missing Persons)” In America:

Life is so strange when you don't know

How can you tell where you're going to

you can't be sure of any situation

something could change and then you won't know

You ask yourself

Where do we go from here

It seems so all too near

Just as far beyond as I can see

I still don't know what this all means to me

I began my journey with this site not really having a clue where I would land. I thought maybe I might get work. But I’ve never liked using the web for the job search. So many unknown destinations await me there. I am frightened by it. The uncertainty of it is mind boggling to me. I’m a play it safe sort of gal. I’m known for my professional nature and appearance. I am humble and happy being, just being human! I didn’t understand this about myself until I faced the reaper so many times without relenting to the grasp. I’m the known yet unknown quantity in the mix. I followed the rules. But life doesn’t have any rules. Rules are the creation of nature and humans. All is but illusion. Is this the Serengeti? The cradle of human life in another form? I fired a blunderbuss a few months ago. Now I’m wondering where I am. “Life is so strange”. #Accountability

Like a teenager trying to figure out what to do after high school, I am lost. I fired the shot not knowing if I would hit anything. But apparently, I have. Unsure of what it’s about? That scares me too. But something has changed. I wake up in the morning ready to rock & roll. I spend about an hour to myself, maybe coffee? I leisurely bathe and then pick out my days gear. Always the same footwear. I call them by battle boots. Made by Dr. Scholl, #producttalk. Lol. I hardly wear makeup anymore. I’m beyond the need for the war paint. But I do indulge myself some mornings. I hop in the car about 30m before the mission begins. The drive is serene. Something I’ve never experienced before. I don’t rush through the traffic trying to get there on time. I instead enjoy the sites! The construction crews, on the highway and beyond. The river rolling in the distance. I arrive first. Next comes the Commanding Officer. Followed by my Commander. An all-female of color command, including me. I enjoy the sun on my skin as I breathe in on the landing. The breeze is surrealistic. The beauty of the Gateway Arch and the buildings in the skyline. The sound of a rooster?! A historic church to adorn the immediate landscape. A small farm in the middle of the city. Serenity is the best way to describe the feeling inside my soul as I stand there just enjoying the sun shining on in. I enter the building clad in my “Neo” like charcoal twin dress with the flourish of “Vader” and begin my day serving at an outpost for #youthdevelopment. But I’m an imposter! “Life is so strange”? #Womenempoweringwomen #Youcandoanything

Imposter Syndrome! I came into this command with a reputation of excellence. Previous commanders have given me the seal of approval as the “miracle worker” that can solve all of the problems in a flash. I’m stationed at the Gateway to the Plains of the modern Serengeti of Neo Rome. I’m not sure if I’m up to it. Trying to live up to your own reputation is not exactly something I would wish upon another. But I did take a decommissioned police vehicle to the state capitol. Complete with driver. I think I made a good impression on the ladies from across the state. It was a conference for persons of my rank to discuss procedural change and my coming out party. Had a panic attack. Resolved my concern. Brought the sun on in. Strutted my stuff by asking poignant questions demonstrating my knowledge of the field. Imposter? #Winningwomen

When you don't know

your destination

and something could change

Civil Servant, that’s me. The damn blunderbuss has brought me back to the doors of the US Government. I’m working for “The People of these United States” again. My last foray into government left me bruised by the system. And an unhinged human. My “Apocalypse Now” moment! But I’ve always had a special place in my heart for humanity. Speaking as one of the “Alien Children”. After all I am you, you are me. Maybe I’ll be like Harvey Pekar. He worked for the government and created “American Splendor”. This writing thing may have proven that life is so strange. The algorithm saw me again. It has put a new player on the field of play. I’m not certain of the option life is offering me but I intend to explore it to the fullest. I’ve been wondering what to do with my memoir once I complete it. A window might be about to open up. Because “Life is so strange”. #Humanity #stlouismissouri #stateofmind #POC

I don't know what to do

and I don't even know the time of day

I guess it doesn't matter anyway

“Ease on down the road”. That’s my plan because I’m not going to carry anything that might be a heavy load. I intend to continue to ride the wave of change like #Obama. Who knows what is to come for me? Mom/teachers always wanted me to go into politics. In fact, she almost ran for office. Death threats derailed her run. She had a family. That’s the first time I ever met a STLCO Prosecutor. We got lucky that night. I saved mom. Something all too many politicians are facing in our current climate. I used to dabble in the world of the lobbyist. Maybe sitting in the “big chair” of my state Representative gave me impure thoughts. Or maybe watching William "Lacy" Clay multitask reminded me of myself. Could be the fact that young people keep comparing me to Maxine Waters. Beware future Steve Mnuchin's of the world!?Maybe #50 to his #44? I have no clue about my destination. Just that I’m comfortable where I am for now. The sun is shining, and my crappy apartment has even begun to appear more palatable.

You ask yourself

When will my time come

has it all been said and done

I know I'll leave when it's my time to go

Till then I'll carry on with what I know

Life is so strange

Destination unknown

when you don't know

your destination

something could change

its unknown

and then you won't know

Destination unknown

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https://youtu.be/1WDly1Oc_P4