Demonstrating Grit.

Some of the most challenging moments in your life require tremendous focus, energy, strength and commitment. It requires “Grit” – an important combination of resiliency, perseverance, and passion to achieve long-term goals regardless of obstacles. Harry Houdini, the famous magician, once quipped that “most lock doors exist only in your mind.” That is true in many cases, but there are plenty of locked doors in the real world. You can look for a key – or simply kick down the door. Grit is an important choice and skill. It sometimes means the difference between life and death. In a nation full of abundance, comfort and privilege, Grit may be one of America’s rarest and most precious assets. Grit is what enabled a relatively weak and untested nation of farmers and blacksmiths to participate in the Boston Tea Party in 1773, and defeat the king and all his men. It also helped us quickly bounce-back and deliver a complete reset after 9/11. Demonstrating Grit is one of the most important things we can do.

A few months ago I was traveling from Texas to Colorado and experienced a gentleman with super-human grit – and the experience changed my life. I was moving through the airport security line behind a man wearing military fatigues and boots. Many of the security personnel seemed to know him and engaged in friendly conversation. He was severely disfigured with 90% or more of his face and body burned. His right arm was a prosthetic with a hook; he made a humorous comment about it as they sent it through the X-ray machine. I could only imagine the horrors he has endured. We made small talk and shared that we were both looking forward to getting home to Colorado to see our families for the weekend. I made extra effort to look at him directly in the eyes. He was articulate, engaging, and very funny – and you could feel his strength. Mental, emotional, and physical strength: True Grit. The small things that were on my mind that morning quickly washed away. I don't know his name, but that man is my hero.

There are moments that remain forever - and completely change you. Over 30 years ago, I was walking home from high school with a great friend, Dave. He was popular and athletic, a good story teller, and a top student full of passion, humor, and interesting ideas. We were kindred spirits. It was a sunny, windy Friday afternoon in the late Spring. I vividly remember every step, story and laugh that day. I have relived it many times in my mind. It was just like many other days we had walked home together; at one point in the journey there was a fork in the road where we took different paths. That particular day we spoke for a few moments, then continued in different directions. When I was about 100 meters or so away, Dave yelled out “Bob, thanks for being such a great friend.” The wind was blowing, but I heard it clearly. I smiled and quickly gave him the thumbs up. Later that night he took his life. To this day no one seems to have an answer for that day. That heavy rock continues to weigh on me all these years later. That tragedy inspires me to understand people and grit even more, and find better ways to strengthen my own gritty mindsets and help others to do the same.

Grit has become an important topic on high school and college campuses across the country, and many boardrooms of some of the most successful companies in America. It is a quality that is hard to measure and understand, and building skills in resiliency have become a major focus for both parents and business leaders. In the early 1990s, Dr. Martin Seligman at the University of Pennsylvania pioneered research in what is today referred to as Positive Psychology. His work has provided important perspectives on how to develop resiliency – such as hope, optimism and self-efficacy, and how to bounce-back after severe challenges. His defining book, Learned Optimism (1991), was the beginning into understanding how we can develop our resiliency skills. He believes we develop Grit by developing 24 character strengths that lead to engaged, meaningful, and purposeful lives. In 2007, Erik Weihenmayer, the first blind-man to climb all 7 major summits of the world, including Mount Everest, and Dr. Paul Stoltz, published their important book, The Adversity Advantage: Turning Everyday Struggles into Everyday Greatness. This year, Dr. Angela Duckworth of the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania, a leading expert on the subject of resiliency, published Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance (2016). She has a great Ted Talk on the subject (TED talk). According to Duckworth, there are five core character traits from which all human personalities stem from: Openness, Conscientiousness, Extroversion, Agreeableness, and Neurotic. Each exists on a continuum with its opposite on the other end, and our personality is the expression of this dynamic interaction. She believes that Conscientiousness is most closely associated with Grit.  

Life is moving faster than ever, and leading a successful and healthy life is not an easy thing to achieve in our modern world. Anxiety and depression are increasing rapidly across our society, especially among our young people on high school and college campuses. We need to provide leadership and direction, and absolutely can reduce our vulnerability to the pressures of life by strengthening our resiliency capabilities and skills. We have so many resources and new thinking on how to do it. Two things we can do immediately to build our resiliency muscles - and help guide our children: Develop a Growth Mindset, and learn to shape a more powerful self-narrative when failure or tragedy unfolds in our lives. We can demonstrate Grit and lead brilliant, bold, and successful lives. All of us. May we challenge each other to model the Grit we see in others – and always demonstrate and strengthen our Grit to ensure we live good, meaningful lives. And extend a helping hand at the right moment to ensure others can demonstrate it, too. What are you doing to demonstrate your Grit at both home and the office today?

Let's Create More Sparks: Robert is a curious Irish-Canadian and well-traveled American who naturally enjoys story telling that includes lots of interesting facts and figures. Stats and data points help tell powerful stories. Interesting quotes and good books bring vivid colors and memorable shapes to a story. Ideally you found an idea or two in this LinkedIn article that you can now use as a fantastic conversation starter with friends or colleagues over a coffee on a leisurely Saturday afternoon.