Dementia & The Holidays - A Guide to Success

As we head into the holiday season many of us look forward to family traditions. Gathering everyone for meals, sharing stories of holidays past, seeing family you haven’t seen in a while, and the joy and festivities that are shared throughout the season.

As you pick up your loved one for those first holiday celebrations, I encourage you to keep a few things in mind, especially if your loved one is challenged with any form of memory loss or cognitive impairment.

1.?????? Having a plan

2.?????? What to pack

3.?????? The importance of home

4.?????? Remember selfcare

Having a Plan- if mom or dad are living in a senior living community, be sure you are communicating with the associates of the community when you are picking up mom/dad and when you will be bringing them back.

Be mindful of the concept of time. It is very important to share with the community, or other members of your family when you will be picking mom up and dropping her off. You might want to wait until the day, or days, before the event to tell mom. Someone with dementia may start anxiously awaiting your arrival days before they are being picked up.

Tip – early in the day tends to be a better time to take mom/dad on an outing, afternoons may be challenging and lead to unexpected agitation and sundowning.

What to Pack- you want your loved one to be comfortable wherever they are traveling. A few things to keep in mind - are they normally cold? Be sure to pack a blanket or extra layers. Will they be staying for a prolonged period of time? Pack any medications and extra doses in case you are later than expected. If mom or dad lives in a community, ask the associates what items may be helpful to pack to make sure mom is comfortable.

The importance of home- holiday get togethers are fun, but sometimes the best part is after the event when you are able to relax and unwind in the comfort of your own home. You might feel that mom or dad are just as comfortable in your house as they would be in their own apartment, but that might not be true. We know in senior living that home does not have to be the house you grew up in or raised your family in, it is a place you can call your own and feel comfortable. Although you provide a welcoming space for mom/dad to visit, it’s not their home and they may be longing for that comfort after a few hours.

Remember selfcare- never forget the importance of taking care of yourself and the role it plays in caregiving. We tend to run ourselves ragged during the holidays, not thinking about the effect it has on our body, both mentally and physically. Be sure you are prioritizing sleep, eating right, and taking time for yourself. It is so easy to get caught up in making sure you’ve bought enough gifts for family, planning out who is hosting what event, baking the traditional cookies, and making sure you’re visiting mom/dad that you forget to take care of yourself. You will be the best caregiver if you remember to care for yourself, you will be able to approach situations with a level head, patience and understanding.

Oh, and when it comes to gift giving, don’t be afraid to buy multiples of an item- your senior living community may thank you! If mom has a favorite shirt or sweater, being able to swap out the dirty one for a clean one may be what starts the day off with a smile!

I leave you with this holiday message, when celebrating with someone living with memory impairment it’s more about the journey than it is the destination- enjoy the moments, even if they look a little different than in years past. The best way to set yourself and your loved one up for a successful holiday, is to do what is in the best interest of the person living with dementia.?

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