The Definition of Life: Crafting Your Own Narrative

Our lives are a reflection of the definitions we create for them. In fact, your life becomes exactly what your definition of it is. The day you redefine life is the day it begins to transform. Even satisfaction is tied to how you define it—your definitions dictate your contentment or dissatisfaction.

But where do these definitions come from? Most of the time, they stem from what we love or value deeply. Your definition of life is influenced by what or whom you want to impress or influence. For example, if your love is directed toward a monkey, your efforts would naturally center around actions that impress the monkey, like jumping from tree to tree. This means your sense of success is directly tied to whether you achieve what your love values.

Let’s extend this idea to societal norms. In rural areas, for instance, it might not matter how much you achieve professionally—if you aren’t married, people may consider you unsuccessful. I don’t say this to criticize marriage but to emphasize how definitions imposed by society can shape our sense of self-worth. If you aim to gain society's approval, you may have to conform to their definitions. But what happens when you don’t?

Redefining Success: My Story

I once told my family that I wanted to marry for love, but they weren’t supportive. A friend of mine said, "If you don’t marry, what will the villagers think?" I responded, "I don’t care, because I’m not trying to impress them." My definition of life doesn’t align with theirs. For me, getting married without love is not success.

This divergence taught me an important lesson: many people create definitions for life based on societal or familial expectations. This often leads to unhappiness. We must craft definitions carefully because they determine not only our sense of success but also our overall well-being.

The Impact of Misguided Definitions

One of my friends once asked me, “What is success?” I replied, “That depends—what does success mean to you?” For him, success meant getting a government job, as his family wanted him to. For me, success lies in being spiritually fulfilled. My definition is rooted in faith and inner peace, not external achievements.

This doesn’t mean I dismiss financial success; I recognize its importance. But for me, financial success is secondary to spiritual fulfillment. My life is already successful because I’ve achieved what aligns with my personal definition.

When definitions go wrong, the consequences can be devastating. A person failing an exam and committing suicide is a tragic example. The root cause is their belief that passing the exam defines their life’s success. Similarly, I’ve seen families crumble because of misguided definitions. For instance, my grandparents believe success means children obeying their parents. When my aunt chose divorce over conforming to their expectations, they felt devastated.

Finding the Right Definition

The right definition of life is grounded in inner satisfaction. A life driven by external approval will always be incomplete. Look at great figures like Buddha, Jesus, Mahavira, or Osho—they defined life through spirituality and inner peace. For them, success was intrinsic, not tied to external validation.

You feel unhappy and unsuccessful not because of your circumstances, but because of the definitions you’ve created. Change them. Stop looking outward for satisfaction. External achievements will never bring lasting contentment. Instead, align your definitions with what is meaningful to you internally.

Redefining your life is a deeply personal journey. The definitions you choose will shape your reality, your happiness, and your sense of success. Choose wisely

Disclaimer: This article is based on my personal reflections and experiences. It is not intended as advice or guidance. Please reflect on your own life and circumstances to craft definitions that align with your values and goals.