Defining Moments
Merrimack Webster dictionary defines “defining moment” as the time that shows very clearly what something is really about.
Defining Moments are those moments that define us, or have a meaningful impact on our life trajectory. Defining Moment can be poignant or subtle, inspiring or unremarkable, positive or negative. It is easy to recognize in hindsight of those moments, however insignificant those moments might have been appreciated at the time they happened. You won't always know it is a defining moment until it happens, sometimes long after it happens.
Most of the defining moments are results of events which strongly challenge or reenforce certain fundamental value you hold or something invokes a strong sense of self awareness. It could be a single experience when the confidence replaces self doubt that we all wrestle with from time to time, or a negative defining moment such as when your character or integrity are being challenged which takes a long time to get over, if you ever do.
There are a few moments I can easily recognized as defining moments for myself.
Becoming a father for the first time was definitely a defining moment in my life. Until you actually become a parent, you will probably not truly understand and appreciate what being a parent means. It is a joy and awesome responsibility at the same time. I gained a much better appreciation for all the things my parents did for us. I remember reading about a lady who escaped the Vietnam war as a little girl and separated with her parents during the chaotic final evacuation. She was eventually adopted by an American couple and grew up with a happy family with full life until she had her own child. It was at that exact moment that she realized that she had to go back to Vietnam and find her parents. Fortunately for her, she was able to eventually locate her parents in a Vietnam village and had an emotional reunion.
Another defining moment during my career occurred two days after I was on a new job run managing a business over ten years ago. I was asking one of our attorneys about a term in a commercial contract, he told me directly that I was in charge and had to make that call. It was a very unremarkable moment at the time but really made me reflect and as a result I gained an increased awareness of my responsibility for decision making.
I also remember those defining moments that it was time for me to make significant decisions in my career including the exact moment I made the decision to go back to business school and the moment I became acutely aware that I needed to change direction in my career.
Not surprisingly, there are defining moments in the history of each country as well, just as individual person.
I read recently how the 1878 solar eclipse was truly a defining moment for the United States. By that time, the United States had emerged on the global stage as an industrial power, but Europe was clearly the center of science. The eclipse of 1878 became a chance for the American public to rally around the scientists and to decide that we did want to compete in that realm. By the early 20th century, United States had become the world’s leader.
In a previous post, I wrote about how the Opium Wars occurred 150 years ago still shape China’s view of the West and influence today’s policy making. In a different twist of history, the 2008 financial crisis was also a defining moment for China. With all the major economies including the United States in a financial ruin, China, justified or not, overnight gained significant political confidence in its economic strength on the world stage. The graph on the right is from a recent McKinsey report on the relative GDP of China vs US which clearly shows an turning point around 2008.
It is important for us to recognize and reflect on those defining moments and understand the underlying value which enabled those moments to become the defining moments. Doing so would make us reflect and have a better appreciation of our own value.
Can you identify and share a few defining moments from your life or from your organizations?
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