A Deeper Dive on Compromise and Negotiation: Getting more nuanced on ‘Bad’ and ‘Good’ Compromise

By Joshua N. Weiss, Ph.D.

If you have followed any of my work on negotiation you have seen that I am generally not a fan of compromise in negotiation. When I share that perspective with a lot of audiences I am often met with confusion and, sometimes, dismay.? Recently I was reflecting on this question more deeply and realized that I really should be clearer by what I mean by compromise and that, perhaps, I have been a bit unfair to the concept.? But not totally unfair.?

The more I think about it, there are really two categories of compromise when it comes to negotiation. To keep it simple, I am going to talk about the things you should never compromise on and then things you can let go of if needed.? Before I get into all of this, let me define compromise so that is clear.? For the purposes of this discussion, compromise is defined with two components.? First, compromise is an agreement or a settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making?concessions (i.e. giving something up).? Second, compromise also means accepting standards that are lower than is desirable.

So, if that is the case, what might a bad compromise look like in negotiation?? Here are the realms where I see compromise being a negative thing:

1.??????? On issues of great importance to you.? When you enter into any negotiation you have a goal or objective you are trying to achieve. That goal translates into what is most important to you.? If you compromise on your critical interests/goals you are really doing yourself a disservice and will most certainly regret doing it. Sadly, this is a place where I see people doing this most regularly. When people engage in this kind of compromise they leave the negotiation table, walk out the door, and kick themselves. Over the longer term people who take this approach often come to dislike negotiation as a result.?

2.??????? When your values are at stake.? In many of your negotiations there is a values based component – those moral and ethical issues you hold near and dear – to what you are discussing.? If you compromise on your values you will bemoan that decision into the future and it may even haunt you in the future negotiations.? ?

3.??????? When you have not done a good job from a preparation point of view. ?Another bad type of compromise is when you have not done your homework and failed to prepare adequately. Compromising when you lack knowledge and a genuine understanding of the issue in question is a recipe for failure and disappointment.

4.??????? When you see the goal of negotiation being to reach agreement. Negotiators often feel compelled to compromise when they think the purpose of negotiation is to reach agreement (incidentally, it is not – it is about meeting your goals as best as possible).? When you hold this perspective, you often unproductively compromise just to get a deal done.? ????

OK, now that we have discussed bad compromises and when not to do that, what about good compromise and when it might make sense to do so?? Here are a few thoughts:

1.??????? On issues that are not of great concern to you.? Not all issues in negotiation are alike.? Some are more important than others to you based on what you value.? A reasonable place to compromise is around those issues that are not important to you. And it is even better if they are not important to you, but are valuable to the other party. Letting those kinds of issues go makes good sense.?

2.??????? When expediency is most important.? There are scenarios in negotiation when time is of the essence and finding a solution quickly is a very important interest of the parties involved. When this is the case, compromise can be a beneficial way of approaching the issues. Just make certain that when you do this you are not compromising on an issue that is critically important to you or that puts in jeopardy your values or ethics. Further, understand that you are likely going to give up on the best solution to find something that is just ‘good enough’ so you can keep the process moving.

3.??????? When you trust the other negotiator. When you trust the other negotiator, you often have some type of relationship with them and will likely negotiate together in the future. If in fact that is the case, and you give something up that is valuable to you in this process AND are very confident that will be made up in a future negotiation, this is an acceptable form of compromise. That stated, you must be very careful here. Often people make promises related to future commitments only to have those fall by the wayside. This is why trust is so key and becomes the critical factor in this type of negotiation scenario.? ???????????

Finally, there is one last important challenge when it comes to compromise that you should consider – when should you compromise during the negotiation process?? Too often people compromise early in a negotiation when it may not be necessary. The only way you find out if you must compromise is to stay with the process and uncover new information as the negotiation unfolds. When you do that sometimes you realize compromise is unnecessary. That stated, if you go through a good bit of the process and cannot see any alignment related to the party’s respective underlying interests than compromise may indeed be the best course of action. Again a good rule of thumb is to compromise toward the end of a process after all other avenues have been exhausted.

So, not all compromise is bad and not all compromise is good.? The key is to know the difference and not to succumb to the pressures negotiators often feel. And make sure that if you do compromise it is toward the end of the process where you realize it may be your only way forward.? ?????