Decide or Don't and You Have...
Barry Lewis Green
Educator, Speaker, Coach, Writer, Creator ... advancing Character Leadership and Education ... to move forward together, stronger ... engaging change.
Decisions, decisions. Day 23 is about Decisiveness.
ROCK 105 is 105 days of deeper dives on 105 virtues. Thus far, we have gone in on Acceptance, Accountability, Appreciation, Assertiveness, Awe, Beauty, Candor , Caring, Certitude, Charity, Cheerfulness, Cleanliness, Commitment, Compassion, Confidence, Consideration, Contentment, Cooperation, Courage, Courtesy ... and Creativity and Daring ... as strengths of character in these days and going forward.
Yesterday, I offered up on Creativity and Daring. Decisiveness flies with them. If Creativity and Daring are wings, then Decisiveness is the tail, providing guidance and direction. Creativity and Daring can be small acts of creating time, or a solution to a problem immediately faced. Decisiveness can be so, as well. Every day. We can create, dare and decide in moments and minutes.
Now, please consider that to decide is to "cut off" ... to cut the cord. Decisions can be made quickly or over time, but they are decisions... they do imply a direction committed, short term or longer. If we are not committed over the moments, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months or years necessary, then we have not truly decided. To decide is to "cut off". To commit. We can indeed change our minds but that too is a decision. And, decisions are made every moment; many are small. I call them micro decisions. We decide on when to get up, what to do, where and what to eat, to call or not to call... and even when we decide not to decide, we have decided. We decide every moment. These are those micro decisions, every moment, every day. Then, there are the macro.
My Macro Decision
I have made a number of varying and increasingly macro decisions in my life; countless really... to move, to return, to marry, to divorce, to eulogize parents, to move in my career... to deal with stroke... and more. You have too, no doubt. I am at the stage of another, now.
Yesterday, I posted on Facebook...
- In these days, and amidst the trials, trails and even triumphs along the way, I have been thinking of what matters most to this boy. Beyond my inner core of friends and those I love, what soulfully matters most to me? I have been in this work of leadership development for 40 years now, and know my stuff (and still learning thank God). I have had so many wonderful colleagues and mentors... and have been remembering their examples. Shinedown sings "I've got a 4 letter word for I don't care"... and I think I know of which they sing. I only want to be and do what plucks the heart strings and that which I know I can bring Excellence to in this, my own life... the rest I don't care anymore. Some body else's work and service and joy ... and I want no arbitrary metrics or goals or "shoulds" in the way. No more icky. Life has its responsibilities, and one of the biggest is to live it. And so, in these days, I get to carve that out... not to be "busy" but to be Barry. Let your Soul speak. It freakin' knows. Better yet, listen. That still, small voice is tryin' to tell you something. That all said, I got a crap load of work to do, but it ain't work. This week, getting some parts of m act together, long freakin' overdue. It is damn sure time. Insha'allah. Oh, and that song... mmmm... love it...
Macro decisions take time. They require Patience and Discernment ...
... in order to have the Confidence, Trust and Faith in their Wisdom. They require Honesty and Truthfulness and Courage.
This decision of mine has taken time, and much of the above. This next Chapter (nay, Book) of mine has been approaching for some time, and I have taken my time to discern and decide. Even along the way, I have made decisions, each one building.
This morning I posted...
- Panda may not be as impressed but I am wearing 42" waist pants snug but comfortable, first time in years. Years! Down from 48" high. Next run is for 40"... by Fall. 38" by Winter. Not counting steps right now... just eating right and active an hour a day at least. I may be single bubbled... but I am double bubble thrilled. Traction freakin' matters. This will get me to the jacket and closer to the dance instructor dude back when. This matters to me though Panda loves me either way.
Such success has been built on a string of micro decisions in support of the process. Decisions are cutting off from other actions. They can be micro or macro, but one macro will require a process of micros... habits released, new habits picked up. Each time, we decide. My thought is that you consider this virtue of Decisiveness.
Read the Virtues Reflection Card above. Reflect on it. Consider how it applies for you in these days and times, and going forward. I am more deeply realizing that I am less inclined to use the word goals now, and more inclined to use the word decision. A goal is something you towards which to aim, and a decision is something to which you commit. I am preferring the latter.
With that in mind and in support of developing our decisive muscles... consider:
- 3 Timeless Rules for Making Tough Decisions
- A classic decision making process
- In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing. --- Theodore Roosevelt
- The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward. --- Amelia Earhart
- Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. --- Ralph Waldo Emerson
- As president, you can get all kinds of advice from all kinds of people. But at the end of the day, when it comes time to make that decision, as president, all you have to guide you are your values and your vision and the life experiences that make you who you are. --- Michelle Obama
What you do with this you decide, or not... and you still have decided.
Peace, passion and prosperity...
Barry Lewis Green, aka The Unity Guy with Epic Engage
Lead, inspire, educate, and unite. Move forward together, stronger. My work is about bringing campuses, companies and communities together, moving forward stronger. I work with educators, entrepreneurs and emerging leaders to do just that. My work is about character leadership and education and its role in helping individuals and organizations build a better world at school, work, business and community. I deliver on it through speaking, coaching and development in character leadership and education. My expertise is character leadership and education. I advance unity in diversity by moving the needle on leadership and education that is high character and results forging. I speak, teach, coach, facilitate, lead, write, sing, dance, cartoon and create on that. In 1980, Professor Rolf Hattenauer changed my life. A highly respected expert in Human Resource Management, he expected much of us and he believed much in us. He was an educator and leader of high character. He was extraordinary. To this day and beyond, I try my darnedest to honor his spirit with my own work. That is another story. But I hope I did him service here.
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