December 13, 2022

Welcome to The?Huddle!

He was eight years old when he asked his parents for two Christmas gifts: a GI Joe and an Easy Bake Oven. His father wasn’t so sure about the Easy Bake Oven. In the 1970s, that would likely result in a “tell me what’s going on” meeting in the kid’s bedroom. Though not entirely on board, Dad relented and got him both gifts.?

Today, it seems like the right move.?

This little eight-year-old didn’t exactly go down the “most desired” path. At 17, in Manhattan, he was a high-school dropout who found himself working at a Baskin-Robbins and, later, a pizza joint. Not exactly the path to greatness for most youngsters.?

But this kid didn’t stop there.?

He “graduated” to making salads at a popular Theatre District restaurant. The owner was so taken by the kid’s talent and desire that he paid his way to attend the French Culinary Institute. Upon graduating, he became a sous-chef, then a chef, and later, an entrepreneur who opened restaurants around the country.?

I first became aware of Bobby Flay on a corny TV show that I was enamored with. I don’t cook, but I watch just about anything involving a winner and a loser.?The Iron Chef?was, in my humble opinion, a slice of greatness! My guy was Chef Morimoto (I met him once in his restaurant in Philadelphia! One of my “pinch me” moments), yet Bobby Flay was always lurking.?

It’s an American Dream-type story. City kid drops out of high school, gets a job a the local pizza shop, discovers that he can make a living by doing something he likes, runs into an “angel” who pays his tuition to get trained, and decades later is an ultra-successful businessman. In a snippet below, we’ll visit the Hero’s Journey. This is a perfect example.?

Today, let’s blow out a candle and wish Chef Bobby Flay a happy 58th birthday. He is a great example of how talent, a strong will, and some luck can help us to be more than we could have once imagined.?

If you enjoy?The?Huddle,?please forward it to someone in your circle of friends. Our list is growing, and perhaps it will spur someone to spend a few minutes each week reflecting, thinking, and feeling a tad more motivated.?

Make Your Bed?

?I got a great email from a former client, friend, and?Huddle?reader a couple of weeks ago. Here’s the story.

Mark Every is a second-generation Navy SEAL. He took his parents (he rightly pointed out that his mom has been through the program twice - as a wife and then as a mother) to a “Frogman Reunion” in Washington, DC. The guest speaker was Admiral William McRaven.

You may know Adm. McRaven, or at least you have heard the concept of “Make Your Bed.” He wrote a book with that title.?Here’s a great commencement speech where he shares his thoughts on that concept.

Mark also shared this: “he probably spent 20 minutes talking to my parents like they were the most important people in the room.”

That’s leadership.

The books you read and the people you associate with...?

?In my early 20s, I had the good fortune of being around driven, mission-oriented people.?

Like many of you, I didn’t start my journey on second base. And depending on how you view it, probably not even on first base. I was the son of a coal miner and a convenience store worker, and neither of my parents graduated from high school. In my community, that wasn’t that unusual. The only thing that kept me out of the coal mines was the fact that I loved baseball, and I was good enough to play in college.?

I slept through lots of high school classes. I’d come alive for History and English, only to be lulled back to sleep in Biology or Math. I regret that I wasted so much time and opportunity.

But once the thought of my future scared me into caring a little more, I slowly started to come around. Granted, that was my second year of college (my first semester is can be categorized as a disaster…but I did win a foosball trophy down at the Student Union).?

What was the thing that got me on the right path??

People and books.

I had professors and coaches that breathed life into me. I looked at others who were doing much better than me and started to believe that if they could do it, maybe I could too.?

I was fortunate to be surrounded by wonderful, nurturing adults, and I noticed: they were all readers. I copied them. I wanted to make up for my lack of effort and preparation; to this day, I still feel like I’m compensating for a shaky start.?

Here’s a YouTube channel with 17 classic Self-Help books .?I read a good many of these in my early 20s. My favorite is the first on the list, Psycho-Cybernetics, by Maxwell Maltz. In our modern sophistication, it’s easy to dismiss these books as hokey. But I promise, there are some fundamental truths in many of these books that can begin to tweak our thinking.

The books you read and the people you associate with determine your future.?

Spending Money Consciously?

?It’s that time of year. If you celebrate Christmas, the stress is beginning. For many, it sucks the joy of the holiday season away. Spending money you don’t have for things that people may or may not want or need. It can be stressful.?

I ran across?this blog post ?that examined how we spend our money through the lens of Japanese philosophy.?

“Wabi-sabi” is the one that caught my eye. It’s the idea that as things age and decay, they become more beautiful. As someone closer to my 60th birthday than my 50th, I sure hope this is true!?

It’s short…and worth a read.?

We are getting close to Goal Setting season!?

?There is a season for everything. And for most people, turning the calendar pages to a new year automatically sets us on a path to new beginnings. We start thinking about how things are going and what changes we need to see to make our lot in life just a bit better.?

Now, if you’ve spent much time with me as a client, you know I’m not a big advocate of traditional goal setting. I think it is essentially a waste of time.?

I encourage you to read this post ?I made in January of this year for perhaps a different take on this annual activity that often is forgotten by Groundhog Day.?

?A quote to leave you with

Have a great week!