Debunking Autism Cure Myths: What Both Sides Get Wrong

This week I stumbled across one of the regular news articles about a possible “cure” for autism, and the usual, highly polarised comment section that went with it. On one hand were those arguing that autism is a neurological difference and seeking a cure is both impossible and offensive. On the other hand, parents of autistic children facing huge challenges who were prepared to do anything to give their children a better life and saw autism as a major problem. Surely, they cannot both be right? Perhaps they can, because I do not think both groups are answering the same question.

For a long time, I would have been firmly in the first camp, taking instant offense at the suggestion that there is something wrong with me that needs to be fixed. Indeed, if you put it to me in those terms, I would still be less than pleased. But I think that this whole discussion is actually much more subtle and nuanced, and that when we consider it from both sides away from the smash-and-grab of an online comments section, there is a lot of common ground here.

I think the way we need to approach the debate is not to think about the arguments being made but the threats being felt by either side. Let’s start with the autistic people who, like myself, object to being told that there is something wrong with us. I do not believe that there is anything wrong with being autistic, and it is definitely not a disease. Many of the parts of me that I like the most and that help me with my work, I credit, at least in part, to being autistic. Strengths like analysis, pattern recognition, creativity, and problem solving are both fundamental to who I am and, I believe, inextricably linked to being autistic. So of course I will not be happy to hear a suggestion that these need to be taken away from me.

But is being autistic all good news for me? Absolutely not. I was bullied horribly at school for being different, and I struggle with social skills to this day. My sensory issues can be a literal headache at times and make many workspaces completely inaccessible to me. Now, while much of the time I think that the issue is that the world around me is not designed for me, there are several aspects of me that I would change if I could, and some of these are undoubtedly related to being autistic. My troublesome digestive system, for example, brings me no benefits at all, and is a common issue with neurodivergent people. If I were offered a “cure” for this today, I would take it in a flash.

So here is a key point. We all have aspects of ourselves that we are not happy with. It is part of being human. We wish we were lighter in weight, fitter, better looking, or more intelligent. Look at the demand for miracle weight loss drugs and the boom in self-improvement books and courses. But here’s the thing – this applies to neurotypical people just as much as to neurodivergent individuals. The fact that some of the things I would like to change about myself are related to my neurology is a bit of a red herring.

Which brings me to the sometimes desperate plight of the parents of autistic children who want the best for their child, as almost all parents do. I know when one of my children spent the first two weeks of their lives in intensive care struggling to breathe, I would have done anything to make them instantly well and bring them home. That is all that most parents of autistic children are doing. But because they know that many of the most serious challenges their children face are linked to being autistic, they seek a cure for autism.

This is where we all need to understand each other a little better. I suspect that many of the parents of autistic children seeking a cure for autism really mean that they want a cure for the things that cause their children difficulty, like being non-verbal or struggling with basic self-care. Any parent of a child with those issues, regardless of their neurotype, would want a better life for their child. I don’t think they see being autistic as a fundamental part of their child that would change them into a different person entirely were it removed, while many autistic adults see it exactly like that. Parents do not want to change who their child is, they just want their problems fixed, and who can argue with that. The unfortunate point is that many medical professionals still lead them to believe that autism is the cause of all their child’s struggles and has no positive side at all, which is simply untrue.

But we autistic adults also need to be more understanding. We all seek to change aspects of ourselves just as the parents seek solutions for their children. Yes, we may be more protective of our autistic identity and recognise it as a fundamental part of us, not an add-on, but that does not mean that we do not have autistic traits that cause us problems. So we are really not that different from the parents of autistic children seeking help for their children, we just label it differently.

So, in many respects, the labels are the problem here. The parents are seeking help for their children’s challenges, the shorthand for which can quickly become a cure for autism. The autistic adults hear “a cure for autism” and immediately see it as an attack on our existence. But neither side is saying what the other thinks. You can be proud to be autistic, as I am, and still recognise that autism brings challenges that you would happily live without. You can want the best for your child as a parent without questioning the validity of the existence of autistic adults. The reduction of everything to a soundbite is the problem, because some things are just too complex to express clearly in 6 words.

But suppose we can overcome this reduction to hostility. In that case, I believe that autistic adults and parents of autistic children working together could be a powerful force for change that is badly needed. Help and support where needed while celebrating the positive aspects of autism. Recognition that being neurologically different is not a problem in itself, while accepting that we all have aspects of ourselves that we would like to change and that some of these can be related to our neurotype.

One of the things I would like to achieve in my writing is to show the parents of autistic children who are desperately worried about their child’s future that there are autistic adults who are successful and happy. Yes, I face challenges every day, but who doesn’t? It is just that many of my challenges are with things that neurotypicals find to be second nature, while other things that many find difficult come naturally to me. None of us are better than anyone else – we are just different. We all have strengths and gifts, flaws and challenges. We are human beings.