Death by Honeysuckle: How a Simple Walk Changed My Perspective

The past many days - many weeks, in fact – have been full on.  My project of countless months is being birthed, and I have felt like a first-time expectant parent, wondering what is going to happen next, if all of the preparations are truly enough, and if things would be 'OK'.  

But the stress of it all!  It blind-sided me. I have always felt like I was adept at handling stressors, not letting them get even a toe hold on my psyche, usually. But perhaps it was the fatigue from the pre-dawn-to-dark work days, or maybe it was the whispers of self-doubt wearing away at me; regardless, I was really feeling it.  Even during my daily yoga and meditation, the fear of failure would sometimes slide in like a phantom, and even though it left as quickly as it came, its murky residue remained.

I realized it was time to take a walk in the woods.  There would be a message waiting for me there, of course, and plus I knew that the fresh air and sunshine would be a welcome change from the burning glow of my laptop.  So I popped the lid closed on my constant companion, left my phone there to keep it company, and went to a favorite park with rolling hills, big trees, and a gurgling creek where I used to go with my dog. 

As I began walking on the trail, I immediately felt better, cleansed even, by the warm sunshine and soft late spring breeze.  I started to breathe easier, and silently remarked to myself how I should do this more often.  Then, as I rounded a final bend, I was stopped dead in my tracks by the sweetest smell imaginable. 

Ah, it was the sugary scent of honeysuckle! I stepped closer still, to bathe in its redolence.  I felt the corners of my lips curl up into a smile as I remembered its unmistakable gift of goodness throughout my neighborhood and on the school playground as a child.  Good days, those- I thought.  After a few minutes, I took three steps to again be on my way, but yet stopped abruptly.  There was something not right, there was something calling out for my attention.  The message was starting to come in.

And there it was - nestled within the wiry bundle of honeysuckle that only a moment ago had my adoration.  It was a young mulberry tree that had become the unwitting lattice for the flowering vine. Upon closer inspection, I saw that the honeysuckle had wrapped itself around all of the lower branches of the tree.  So much, in fact, that it was hard to discern what was tree versus vine.  This sweet vine that had just brought me so much pleasure and ease a few minutes before was actually slowly killing this tree, smothering it. Only at the very top of the tree did its leaves still remain.

I touched a leafless lower branch of the tree, so that it would know that someone saw it.  Isn’t that what we all want?  To be seen, to be heard? Both the tree and the vine were just trying to do what they are naturally meant to: grow and thrive.  But the vine, in this case, was overpowering the sensibilities of the tree.  This was not a union of harmony, and it appears that unless the groundskeepers of the park tend to the situation, the fate of the tree shall be sealed.

Finishing my walk, I knew that this was the message for me.  And I am writing this because it may be a message for you, too.  We are the groundskeepers of our lives.  Are we paying attention to what is growing?  Does some part need more nourishment, like better soil in which to grow, or more air or transforming sun? Or does something need to rest, and be watered in quiet and shade?  Taking care, in this moment, is the bottom line.  The projects, the work, the stress, the love, the joy, the sorrow – every emotional gamut – will come and go.  Look to yourself, inside and out.  Is there something that, even though its promise is sweetness, might be choking you? And if so, do you will it to be that way, or do you want it to change?  Only you can prune and enrich your own garden. 

So what shall it be?  For you know, the garden doesn’t stop growing.  Sometime today, set aside ten minutes to consider all of this.  Ten minutes may sound like a lot, but is it really?  Aren’t you worth the care and attention?  You are justified in taking this time for yourself, to keep your being healthy and optimal.  Your friends, family and colleagues deserve it, too, so that you can bring forward your best for them as well, and vice versa.  Go ahead, then, I invite you to enter your garden, and make it beautiful again, one snip and one seed at a time.

~Jennifer Lipski