Dealing with Christmas Blues

And Embracing the New Year

As the festive season approaches, many of us are swept up in the rush to meet expectations, organizing the perfect Christmas dinner, ensuring the celebrations are just right, and navigating the complex web of emotions that come with this time of year. For some, it’s a season of joy, but for others—myself included—it’s also a time of reflection, grief, and longing.

This year, my family and I are facing our first Christmas without my mum, the matriarch of our family. She was the heart of our holidays—the one who filled the fridge with all our favorite treats, wrapped gifts that seemed to cascade endlessly under the tree, and made sure every Christmas card reached its destination, even in the busiest postal season. Her absence leaves a void that feels almost impossible to fill.

It’s hard not to feel the weight of her absence, especially as we approach Christmas Day. The sight of an empty chair at the table or the silence of the kitchen without her clattering about is a constant reminder of what we’ve lost. But in this quietness, I’ve found a moment to reflect—a space to honor her memory while navigating the emotions of the season.

If you, too, are grappling with loss, loneliness, or the heavy expectations of the holidays, know that you’re not alone. Here are a few ways I’m finding peace in the midst of it all, and I hope they might bring comfort to you as well:

1. Create Space for Reflection

In the stillness of early morning or a quiet moment during the day, take time to sit with your thoughts. Writing, as I’m doing now, can be incredibly cathartic. It allows us to process our emotions, whether they’re grief, sadness, or even moments of gratitude.

2. Find Community and Connection

Yesterday, I visited my sister’s local church. The simple yet profound message of the service—to seize opportunities, reflect, and love those around us—lifted my spirits. Even if faith isn’t your path, finding a community where you feel a sense of belonging, whether through friends, family, or local groups, can provide solace.

3. Embrace Your Emotions

The holidays often magnify our feelings. Let yourself feel them. If grief moves you to tears, let them flow. If fear arises, face it. Our emotions are a testament to our humanity and to the depth of our love and connections.

4. Simplify and Prioritize

If the demands of the season feel overwhelming, give yourself permission to step back. Chunk down your tasks, focus on what truly matters, and remember that a small gesture—a phone call or checking in on a friend—can be the greatest gift.

5. Honor the Memories

For me, my mum’s presence feels alive in the traditions she created and the values she instilled in us. Though she won’t be sitting at the table, I see her in the way my siblings and I come together, in her favorite dishes we prepare, and in the love that continues to bind us.

6. Look Ahead with Grace

As the year comes to a close, it’s natural to feel uncertainty about what lies ahead. Letting go of the need to control everything and embracing the unknown with an open heart can be liberating. This isn’t about dismissing the pain of the past year but about allowing ourselves to move forward, even with the weight of our experiences.

A Final Thought

This Christmas, let’s give ourselves the gift of humanity. Be kind to yourself. Slow down and appreciate the moments, however small, that bring light amidst the darkness. Whether it’s sharing a quiet laugh, crying when the emotions overwhelm you, or simply breathing deeply and letting it be, remember: you are only human.

This season, may we all find peace, connection, and the courage to face the new year with hope. And to those we’ve lost, may their memories bring warmth to our hearts and guide us through the days to come.

Merry Christmas, and may your new year be one of healing and love.

#ChristmasBlues #CopingWithLoss #NewYearReflections #SelfCareMatters #RetreatsWithHelen @retreatswithhelen