Dealing with Change? Focus on Today

I’ve been thinking a lot about change lately. My son is heading off to college. My company just got acquired. My father passed away last year. And a thousand other things that occupy my mind but aren't worth mentioning.

We’re absolutely surrounded by change. Perhaps we think it’s unique to our fast-paced world. It’s not new. The line about “the only constant is change” is attributed to Greek philosopher Heraclitus who lived and experienced change 2500 years ago. If life is a school that constantly gives us tests to shape our thinking and help us grow, then change is like finals week, seeing if we can put into practice what we’ve learned.

The truth is, we’ve all been there in one way or another. Life has a way of throwing curves our way. Job change, divorce, death of a loved one, or just the uncertainty of what your future holds – these things can be incredibly stressful. It doesn’t have to be that way.

There’s a practice of some Buddhist monks that I find fascinating. They’ll work together to create elaborate sand mandalas -- incredible works of art. It starts with the lead monk drawing an outline on the ground. They’ll work for days, sometimes weeks, usually in groups, delicately dropping colored sand into intricate patterns on top of the outline. They consider the act of creating this work sacred. After the group spends weeks together, caring for the placement of each individual grain of sand, they step away from their masterpiece. Then what? Selfies? Post to Twitter to see how many ‘likes’ they can get? Maybe a coat of shellac so they can stand it up and hang it on the wall of the monastery or a museum?

Nope. They carefully sweep their masterpiece up into containers and pour the sand into a river, washing it away with their blessings.

The message? Impermanence. Nothing lasts forever. 

Creation and Acceptance

I’ve been trying to crack the code on this puzzle for years. How can we just “let it go” and take whatever life brings? Doesn’t that just make us a leaf on the river, out of control, but going with the flow?

For me, the sand mandala has become the perfect analogy for a balanced approach to life. It demonstrates two types of energy at play. Creation and Acceptance.

With creation, we focus on a richly imagined future (the outline of the mandala). We work with diligence to create something beautiful. Every action, every moment is sacred, carefully crafted towards our goal.

And then, after we’ve done everything we can and our creation is complete, we let it go. With acceptance, we have gratitude for the experience, content in the knowing that we’ve done everything we could do and outcomes are always uncertain.

The simplest advice is often the hardest to follow. It’s natural for us to obsess about the past, especially if we’ve invested so heavily in it. A job, a relationship, a life that was richly imagined and cared for.

That was the old reality. And because it’s in the past, that old reality is gone. Putting our energy there is a lost cause. No amount of shouting at the sky will change the past.

Obsessing about the future is not helpful either. Yes, we need a healthy plan. We need a focus, even an expectation for what we’d like life to be like – like the mandala outline on the ground. We can create a richly imagined future. But when standing in the face of a big change that we didn’t plan for (health, relationships, work), sometimes it’s hard not to obsess about what might happen.

Make Today Great

So what to do?

Regardless of our situation, we can focus on the current moment and make it great. Think of the monks making the mandala. They’re focused. They’re giving their absolute best to create something beautiful. They’re filling themselves with joy.

Change can be confusing and complicated. We need something simple to focus on, to help us get our bearings. One small step we can take towards more solid ground. It starts right now. Take a deep breath. Smile.

Make today great.

Scott Shute is a customer-focused executive, mindfulness leader, and enthusiastic photography nerd. You can follow him on LinkedIn, Instagram (@scottshutephotos), or on his website at www.scottshutephotos.com.