?? This dead crypto founder might be alive
Gm, this is the doodhwala, the only crypto newsletter that Santa gifts as a present during Christmas.
So, you can gift the subscription to the doodhwala to your frens? ??
Here’s what we got in the ?? today:
- ?? Oh DAMN! Gerry is still alive
- ?? The problem with Bitcoin miners in 5 numbers
- ?? Chaach and Charts: Users vs Developers
- ?? Milky Meme Of The Day
Let’s boogie
?? Oh DAMN! Gerry is still alive
This is Gerald Cotten.
(the dude, not the dogs)
→ First: You’d think he’s a nerdy tech dude.
You’re right.
→ Second: You’d think he started a crypto company, cuz we’re talkin about him.
You’re right again.
→ Third: You’d think he stole nearly $200 million in Bitcoin Inc., faked his death in Jaipur, set up his wife, and is now chilling in the Caribbean.
…wait what?!?! ??
Yup, Mr. Cotten is thought to be the mastermind of QuadrigaCX, a mysterious Bitcoin exchange, and the largest crypto exchange in the capital of Punjab…yes…Canada ????
There’s even a Netflix documentary about it (10/10 doodh recommends ??)
But now, 3 years after this death, 2 years after Quadriga’s BTC was seized, and 1 year after the documentary, the stolen BTC is on the move.
Netflix, you listening?
What TF happened?
On December 17, over 104 BTC ($1.7 million) was moved out of Quardriga’s wallets.
This happened in 5 transactions of about 10-30 BTC per transaction.
Where did the money go?
About 69 BTC (lol) went to Wasabi, a non-custodial privacy Bitcoin wallet, which uses a feature called CoinJoin.
CoinJoin is not the name of the FTX orgy session, eww ??
It’s a method of grouping BTC payments from multiple addresses into one transaction. So that it can’t be traced back to one transaction.
Suddenly, it looks less suspicious.
The Bitcoin mover wanted to hide their traces, so they used Wasabi.
The rest of the BTC was sent to random addresses.
Who tf is behind this?
3 suspects. One is quite boring, and two are exciting tbh.
1?? Ernst & Young
Seriously is there a company with a more boring name than Ernst and Young ??
E&Y was appointed as the bankruptcy trustee for Quadriga.
Basically, they oversee the money.
But they don’t hold the keys to the BTC wallet, so they can do pretty much nothing to stop the movement of the Bitcoin ??
2?? Master Sifu
WARNING: This is a whooole different rabbit hole ??
Michael Patryn aka Master Sifu this dude:
He was the co-founder of Quadriga along with Gerald, and he’s an:
- identity thief
- creator of — Wonderland —which turned out to be a scam
- the dude with a goatee that almost screams “don’t trust me with your money”
He could be back and behind this transfer. ??
3?? Gerald Cotten
Yup, the dead CEO could just be not so dead.
With no evidence as to who’s behind the move, and Cotten’s death still a mystery, he could be behind the move.
After all, he’s the only one who had access to the private keys of the stolen BTC.
Doodhwala’s take:
2022 is weird af for crypto.
After LUNA, 3AC, and FTX, anything can happen.
So a dead crypto founder coming back to life and stealing the Bitcoin he already stole once isn’t that out of whack, don’t ya think?
Who do you think is behind the Quadriga Bitcoin move?
Hit us with your whackiest answer and win some $MATIC ??
?? Help the doodhwala ??
We started this newsletter as a fun thing! ??
It went well.
- you laughed
- you told us our humor is ??
- you even sent us a bottle of spoiled milk
But most importantly crypto is kinda fun for you now.
Our goal has always been to give you the ?? milkiest ?? content ever.
And it ain’t just news. And it certainly ain’t just newsletters. ??
It’s a whole buncha things!
We’ve got a few ideas. Some good, many many are terrible.
So, we wanna know what you think.
Be a cool doodh and take this survey pls.
?? ?? ??
The problem with Bitcoin miners in 5 numbers
Bitcoin miners are down worse than N95 mask makers this year. ??
Yesterday, one of the largest Bitcoin mining companies — Core Scientific — announced bankruptcy which is a fancy way of a company telling its lenders, “ummm, we don’t have any money to pay you lolsorry!”
Bitcoin miners are DOWN bad because of:
- falling prices (got no clue about prices)
- increasing hashrate, (wtf is hashtrate)
- higher electricity and hardware costs (why does this matter?)
But how deep ?? are they in? Here are 5 numbers for you:
-$3,200 — the loss of a Bitcoin miner when they mine exactly 1 Bitcoin right now.
WTF!
Yes, the average Bitcoin mining cost is around $20k, and Bitcoin is trading at $16.2k.
Unless a miner is creating the coins outta thin air, like the govt creates the dollar or the rupee, the costs are pretty high rn.
And I thought I lost a lot of money in this bear market. ??
2 — the number of BIG Bitcoin miners that filed for bankruptcy this quarter. The first was Compute North, and the second was Core Scientific which went ?? this week.
Chances are 2 → 5 soon as more North American miners are about to ??
$4.3 billion — the valuation of Core Scientific when it went public last year. And how much is it valued right now?
$1 billion? $0.5 billion?
Nope, it’s down 98% to $78 million.
→ That’s worse than Bitcoin since its top in Nov 2021 (??75%)
→ That’s worse than Paytm’s share performance since listing (??66%)
→ THAT’S EVEN WORSE THAN FTT’s price change since FTX blew up (??96%)
9,618 Bitcoins — the number of BTC Core Scientific had to sell back in April 2022 to remain operational.
This amount of BTC was sold for $380 million
If they sold this BTC now, it’ll be worth $160 million
Looks like Core Scientific managed to time the 2022 top. ??
Talk about one last win before a whole string of losses! ??
-88% — the decline in the stock price of Marathon Digital (the largest publicly traded Bitcoin miner).
Funny thing is, Marathon Digital is the best performing public Bitcoin mining company on the market. ??
Guess I'm beating someone in this market. ?
Doodhwala’s take:
For miners to have a better 2023, Bitcoin prices need to improve or mining costs need to drop, or they need to subscribe and read the doodhwala.
?? ♂?
Chaach and Charts: Users vs Developers
“Buidl and they will come”
There’s some saying like that. Here’s what it means:
Spell the word “build” incorrectly as “buidl” and they i.e. grammar nazis will come and correct you.
Oh!
I’ve just been informed that this ?? is not what it means.
In fact, it means, build something and users will come.
But that’s not what’s happening with the blockchains.
Because the top 3 blockchains by developer activity are:
?? Ethereum
??Cosmos
But the top 3 blockchains by daily active users are:
?? Binance smart chain Development Services
?? Ethereum
Milky Meme of the Day
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