THE DAYS THAT TRY MEN'S SOULS...

THESE ARE THE DAYS THAT TRY MEN’S SOULS…

“These are the times that try men’s souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands by it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives everything its value…”

Thomas Paine, ‘The Crisis’

I can’t imagine how Thomas Paine felt when he wrote these words, but I fully understand trials and tribulations, so I agree that there are times when a person will look up to the heavens with pregnant eyes and feel abandoned, misunderstood, maligned, alone and all the other adjectives that make one feel that perhaps not being born would have been a better option. Then of course, one would reach deep into one’s soul and be moved to write about the days that try men’s souls.  

When Wuhan coughed, most of us didn’t even notice, when Wuhan sneezed, we probably said a quick “bless you”, and moved on with the silly busyness of our lives. When Wuhan lay sick, we probably thought, ‘Poor baby’, you will soon feel well, it’s winter, it’s the ‘flu, it’s normal’. But when Wuhan exploded, we took notice; this was not just the ‘flu, this was not normal, this was out of hand, this became a pandemic.

For my first pandemic, it has been both overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time, if that is possible. I have felt comfortably in pain, if there is such a thing. Perhaps I now know what it means to live each day as it comes, a lesson I thought I had mastered by now with all the times I have been comfortably in pain, which has been times without number. I have found out that I could never have been in healthcare; I have panic attacks when I wear face masks. This means of course, that I have discovered a new phobia. If wearing a facemask becomes the new normal, it means I will throw out more than just my lipstick, lip gloss and lip liners, it also means I will have to take anti depressants or some other medication with me, so when I flip out, I won’t get carted off to an isolation centre to decompress for 14 days or so.

I have also realized that housework on a daily basis is torture, there is only so much dusting, washing, sweeping, mopping and cooking a person can do without beginning to feel like they are leaning towards insanity. When I started having conversations with inanimate objects, I took the decision to stop my 12 hour day of chores. Now I can still smile when I see a mess and walk pass it without feeling like I am a failure.

I have realized that it is ridiculous to think that you have to keep to a routine. 24 hours are 24 hours, there is no such thing as morning, noon, evening and night in a pandemic. Do whatever your mind and body want to do, when you want to do it. In lockdown, you go upstairs or down stairs, if you are lucky enough to have stairs! Otherwise, you stay on one floor all the time, every time.

I have experienced my first pandemic with all my children; this is truly weird. I cannot tell them what to do because the experience is new to all of us. So for the first time, we are comparing our pandemic notes and advising each other on what we each think is the best way to go. On the other hand, my mother too, is also experiencing her first pandemic as well; it is also a learning experience for her. Three generations, one pandemic, these are truly the times that try men’s souls.           

What has truly been painful for me is thinking about how this has been for the most vulnerable people in the world; the elderly, the refugees, those who rely on earning a daily wage, those with underlying health issues, the healthcare workers, the unemployed, those living with domestic violence, the imprisoned, the youth and so many others who are having a nightmare of a time. These are the days that will try their souls. Let us remember them with a prayer and whatever we can give.

Those who love bad news have had a field day; it has been an awesome time. Even the most ridiculous minutia has been dissected a million times. Those who love to peddle unverified information have been all over the place. They have spread every ludicrous supposition known to man. Those who love disasters have predicted woe upon woe upon woe; we are supposedly only going downhill from here, left to them, we should all just curl up and die.

My conclusion to this is a beautiful message I cut out of a birthday card about 10 years ago that I fell in love with and that inspires me always: “Live while you are alive and bloom where you are planted…” it is simple, it is doable, it is timeless and it is pertinent. Since we are in a time that tries our souls, let us live while we are alive and bloom where we are planted.